How to Write and Publish a Non-Fiction Book in 17 Weeks

I'm currently in the middle of a very exciting time: drafting my third book, tentatively titled 12 RITUALS FOR ART + INCOME: Learn and Apply the Habits of Successful Artists, Writers, and Other Creatives. 
 I thought I'd share with you my plan to complete and publish the book by the end of November, 2014.

The Plan

1. Week of August 4: Draft The Beginning (first chapter)
2. Week of August 11: Draft Chapter 2 and organize interviews
3. Week of August 18: Draft Chapter 3 and title research/testing.
4. Week of August 25: Draft Chapter 4 
5. Week of September 1: Draft Chapter 5
6. Week of Sept 8: Draft Chapter 6
7. Week of Sept 15: Draft Chapter 7 and begin cover design
8. Week of Sept 22: Draft Chapter 8 and ask for Beta Readers
9. Week of Sept 29: Draft Chapter 9
10. Week of Oct 6: Draft Chapter 10 and continue cover design
11. Week of Oct. 13: Draft Chapter 11 and ask for Beta Readers
12. Week of Oct 20: Draft Chapter 12
13. Week of Oct 27: Draft Chapter 13
14. Week of November 3: Draft Chapter 14
15. Week of November 10: Re-write and send to Beta Readers. 
16. Week of November 17: Complete cover design, write book description and any other sales copy or launch copy needed. Set up/spread the word about hard launch via Author Marketing Club.
17. Week of November 24: Incorporate the thoughts and edits of my beta readers and soft launch the book! (Hard launch will be December 30, 2014.)

Eating the Elephant

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time goes the cliche. The first version of the plan had me working on the book until the last day of December. And when I talked to Prince Charming about my plan to work right through our baby's birth and even work the week of Christmas (ha... ha ha, ha), there was enough eyebrow raising that I thought maybe there was a slight chance I was biting off like, huge elephant bites at a time when my life will already be a feast, metaphorically and literally.  So I tightened up the schedule so I can enjoy my baby and holiday time. I did this by making my elephant bites a wee bit larger earlier in the plan, but still chew able.  I allowed for those bigger bites by saying "no" to some other things in my life. This is the key you have to understand if you are going to fit more in.

Drafting to Soft Launch

The plan is a very tight schedule and includes up until the soft launch (the publishing of the book on Amazon.com). The hard launch is when the publicity takes place and the book reaches a wider audience.

If you have the time, I recommend adding a few additional weeks to give yourself some breathing room on your own book. I think 20 weeks is a good goal for this process.

Research Time

Please note that this plan does not include the majority of the research time for the book. I'll still be researching throughout my drafting time, but I've also already done a lot of the research.  This is a topic I've been intensely interested in for years. I tend to naturally collect information on topics I'm interested in, and I did,  both before I knew I'd be writing about this, and more systematically after I started blogging about it, sometime over a year ago.

Word Count Goal

The book will likely hit somewhere between 42,000 and 60,000 words. This is enough to get the point across without being too much of a time investment for busy readers. Each chapter will be around 3,000 to 4,300 words, so that's less than 1000 words a day. Hey, that's a pretty easy bite of the elephant!

P.S.  FYI I would probably never eat a real-life elephant.

Publishing

I use Amazon's KDP program which makes the publishing process both easy and very quick. See this post for more about why I love this program for self-publishing authors.

Your Project

I hope today's post helps you on your own book writing project! Let me know in the comments below if you have any questions or thoughts. Please share this post with that person you know who has a non-fiction book inside them just waiting to get out.

photo credit: Just Us 3 via photopin cc

Top 5 Packing Tips for A Long-Term Mission Trip

This is part one of a guest post by Thomaida Hudanish, a blog reader and traveler who I met when she came to Palestine as part of the trip she talks about in this post. Stay tuned for part two which will be published in early November. Enjoy. - Genevieve

Type of Trip:

Extended Volunteer/Mission Trip/Pilgrimage a.k.a. Around-the-World-to- Help-Children

Length of Trip:

Indefinite

Destinations:

India, the Middle East, Western Europe

Overview

In November 2013, I set off for a trip to volunteer with Orthodox Christian ministries in various places, beginning with an orphanage outside of Kolkata, India and continuing to a school in the West Bank, Palestine. While I packed with the intention of continuing to volunteer after these first two assignments, instead I returned to the United States via a 5-week tour of France, Germany & England, to seize a job opportunity in line with the same goals and mission that inspired me to take this journey.

Tips

1. Two Kinds.

Rick Steves says that there are two kinds of travelers: those who packed light and those who wish they had. I agree and I'm still in the second camp. As much as I wish that I could throw everything on my back and jump onto a moving train, that's not the kind of trip I planned and let's face it, that's not the kind of traveler I am. So, yes, PACK AS LIGHT AS YOU CAN. Then read on to learn why I'm still glad I brought more than I wanted to.

2. Tell Your Story.

I packed a letter-size laminated US/World map and an inexpensive, 20-pg photo album with pictures of friends, family members and everyday happenings in my life at home. These are two tools that helped me to share about my life and relate with new friends, in many cases across language barriers. Alternatively, you might consider making a little slide show to flip through on whatever electronic device you bring.

3. Compartmentalize

I'm a huge fan of packing sacks, regardless of brand. They help me to stay organized even after I settle into a location. The other thing I did was to create designated Ziploc bags for my office, first aid & medications and electronic accessories. For example, the "Office" bag held pen refills, a permanent marker, binder clips, a highlighter, sticky tack, post-its, and a glue stick. The "First Aid" bag had Bandaids, anti-diarrhea medication, vitamin-C packets, hydrocortizone cream and so on. Another Ziploc held chargers, plug converters, cords, and extra batteries. This way, even on the road, everything had a place. I also packed a few extra Ziplocs in varying sizes.

4. Fashion vs. Function

Knowing that my travel destinations could involve the beach, a formal event or a professional work setting, I had to plan for variety, but focus my packing on the known activities: playing with children and going to church. Long skirts were a must for the conservative cultures and monastic environments that I intended to be a part of, so I brought three. Additional favorites were: a merino wool pullover, a cream-colored long- sleeve shirt with some lace detail to help dress up some outfits, a lightweight henley with adjustable sleeve-length, black leggings, and a pair of comfortable, sturdy mary-jane style Privos. A daily moisturizer with SPF was the MVP of my cosmetics, but I also used a little makeup, sparkly hair accessories and earrings for special occasions.

5. Technology on the Road

I didn't want to lug my laptop around the world--what a hassle! As a writer, however, it's the one tool I used every day. I brought along an extra hard drive for biweekly backups and packed it in a separate bag from the laptop in case of theft. In addition to writing a blog, editing photos and keeping up with my family and friends via Skype, I used the laptop extensively in each volunteer position. I purchased a new camera for the trip because documenting my experiences for readers at home was a priority. My older point & shoot camera came along as backup for excursions involving sand, water or questionable security.

Another gadget I like for journeys big and small is the humble headlamp. It's great for reading in bed after you've crawled under the mosquito net for the night.

Thomaida wrote a series of articles about her 7-month volunteer pilgrimage covering India, Turkey, Israel/Palestine, France, Germany and England at www.honeybeebuzz.org. She lives, writes and dreams up new ways to make the world a better place in Portland, Oregon.

My Top 3 Takeaways For a Wealthy Creative Life - WDS 2014

Part of my USA travels this July included a trip to Portland, Oregon for the World Domination Summit, "a  gathering of creative, interesting people from all over the world." More from the Eventbrite description: "Every summer, thousands of people travel to Portland, Oregon for an immersive experience in life, work, and travel."  

My top 3 takeaways for the creative life from WDS 2014:

Use your imagination to increase your bravery.

We are scared. Our imaginations, when used correctly, are powerful things. Put those two together and you have a recipe for bravery. Over and over, the speakers talked about how scary it was to take risks in life, business, and creativity. But if you use your imagination in a positive way, you can do anything. It's like the tired advice given to professional speakers to imagine audience members all naked. Stuff like that works. But here are some more original examples.

• Gary Hirsch got interested in how art impacts peoples lives for good, and hand painted a bunch of tiny robots, giving them away to people as "bravebots." He and a team hand painted one of these for every summit attendee. He's got photos of people holding these before they go in for chemo, surgery, and before doing other, less physically scary things, like, oh, write a book. His challenge to us was to "activate" our little bot by posting our brave thing on social media. So I did. My one brave thing: write and publish a book by the end of 2014.

• Tiny home builder Dee Williams came onstage wearing a "superhero cape" that was actually a Delta airlines blanket. Just that alone took guts. In a moving and hilarious speech, she talked about how walking around in her every day life wearing her "invisible superhero cape" gave her not only buns of steel and better posture, but an attentiveness to how she might help people around her in grocery stores, parking lots, and other daily-life places.

Declare yourself.

Saying your dreams out loud can be magical. A simple declaration of identity or action, spoken to an audience, has more power in your life than unspoken thoughts.

Speaker Elisa Blaha Cripe had trouble definining what she did. After lots of soul-searching, this is her answer: "I make stuff." And she really does. It's powerful because there's so much integrity in her statement. She is an artist and crafter and she is constantly creating.

She had us write down our declarations.

Mine: I'm a writer.

Scarier: I write inspiring books that help people live better, happier lives.

Scariest: I am love.

Take imperfect action.

This gem came from most of the speakers, but was most clearly stated by one of my favorites, Jadah Sellner, who told  authentic stories about the imperfections and failures that went along with her entrepreneurial journey. These stories were encouraging in light of the very successful business she eventually built (after lots of failure.)

I was struck by how the action people took was most assuredly and often NOT the action I would have taken. Ever. After witnessing the effects of an oil spill, "The Planet Walker" John Francis decided to stop riding in cars and took a 17-year vow of silence. Would I have ever dreamed up that response? No. Was it effective in changing things? For him it was, probably because it came from a true place inside him.

A fellow attendee, "The Poem Catcher" decided to travel the world with a large butterfly net. He asks people to write and donate poems and throw them in his net. Then he makes books and sells them and gives the proceeds to charity. Here he is:

These actions are creative, possibly insane, and probably imperfect, but they are working.

However, it's called imperfect action because it doesn't always work. Don't be afraid to try something else. There's no shame in trying and failing if you learn and try something else.

I'm writing a book on creativity, and will be focusing on that throughout this fall. I'll use this space to write about what I'm sure will be a very imperfect journey towards a completed book. I look forward to sharing it with you.

What do you think of these takeaways? Which one is speaking to you the most?

More About My Experience

This was my first time going to the summit, although I've thought it would be fun to go since I first heard about it a couple of years ago. It is the first event I've attended as an investment in myself as a writerpreneur, which felt good in that little-bit-scary, challenging way. I showed up alone, nervous about an entire weekend of meeting strangers. With over 3,000 other people in attendance, would I meet the right ones? Would I learn a lot, make exciting connections, and have fun?

I needn't have worried.

Before the first day was even halfway over, I felt that I never wanted to speak or blog again, because I had met so many good-hearted people doing wonderful, interesting, creative, world-changing things. People with so much to share, so much wisdom. All I wanted to do was listen and learn from these people. Of course the funny thing about creative and world-changing people is that they are curious and they wanted to hear about what I was doing too. Each person I met was encouraging and genuinely interested in what I was doing, some energetically offering helpful advice, encouragement, or connections.  I don't remember the conversational content of several of the most impactful interactions I had, just how they gazed into my eyes with so much gentleness, acceptance, love and undistracted presence that my life is changed for the better. Not a single person I talked to was cynical, jealous, or discouraging.

One B-schooler I met up with during the welcome party, Jackie Knechtel at Pure Vibrant Living, rushed me around, introducing me to about half the attendees, it seemed like. When I asked how she knew so many people there, she said that she'd traveled to over 50 countries, and just loved people. People loved her too, basking in her warmth and openness and hugs.

Throughout the weekend I continued to meet kindred spirits, like this wonderful woman who runs Alight Biz Solutions. She and I plotted together about creativity, project management, book writing, and empowering women in business. And we shared the summit's gift to us: a free hot air balloon ride.

Pho and Everything else in America

There are rare occasions when traveling that one experience rises so far above the others,  that no matter how amazing the others are, they fade into the background when remembering the trip.

Such is the case with one experience from our pretty-epic-if-I-do-say-so-myself July travels around the U.S. (and a quick trip up to Canada).

Now, if I saw you on this trip, I don't want you to be jealous. If I sailed on a boat with you, went to a funeral with you, rode a cruzbike with you, danced in your bedroom, crab-clawed my way down a mountain with you, cherished your adorable newborn, planned world domination with you, rode in a hot air balloon with you, chased waterfalls with you, cuddled with your loving, one-eyed Chihuahua, or floated in a jacuzzi during a hurricane with you, please don't be jealous.  I'm telling you I had a wonderful time.

If you are my husband, please don't be jealous.

I think you will all understand.

What happened was, I fell in love with a bowl of Pho. It was just so delicious.

More specifically, this bowl of Pho served up at New Tu Do on Bowery Street in NYC is the one that has my heart:

For the uninitiated, Pho is a Vietnamese rice noodle dish usually prepared in an oxtail broth that has been slow-simmered for a long time.

This one had juicy pieces of thinly-sliced beef, bean sprouts, Thai basil, cilantro, and lemon. I dressed it with the perfect amount of Sriracha. How my heart longs for it again.

I emailed a friend, "I can have hope in all things turning out okay in the world because that bowl of pho exists."

Now let's put that bowl of Pho in its place in the trip.

Saying Goodbye

My trip began a week earlier than we had planned with the passing of my Aunt Jenny, who had been suffering with brain cancer for almost two years. I wasn't planning on going to the memorial service, but after I talked to my mom, Prince Charming and I decided to scramble and see if I could fly home to NC for a week before our regularly scheduled trip which would have begun in NYC. I could and I did.  It was great to be with my family during this really sad time. Of course, joy was mixed into our grief, because Aunt Jenny's suffering has ended.

It's always fun to get together with my big family, even if though what brought us together was sad. Being one of the oldest cousins on this side of the family, I remember the birth or toddlerhood of most of my cousins, who now, inexplicably, have become handsome young men.

The handsome part is explicable (those good genes everywhere) but not the grown up part, and not the "men" part. I have no idea why there is a preponderance of males on this side of the family. Out of my seventeen cousins, there are 13 boys and 4 girls.

NYC

Next Prince Charming flew over and I flew up. We met in NYC where we enjoyed civilization, including lots of people-watching and wandering the streets of Manhattan. During our time in the city, we ate things like hipster pork sammies served on chopping boards with artisanal sasparilla soda. But more importantly, I met my other soulmate, that aforementioned bowl of Pho.  The first time I ate it, I regretted not being able to finish the bowl. Even though I was stuffed, I immediately wanted to go back to the restaurant. I begged Charming. I hoped for burps that would bring back the taste. I had a very vivid dream in which I was eating it again. So of course we went back a second time. I made sure to get a pho-to of the two loves of my life.

I think this pho-to captures the crazy look in my eyes revealing my obsessive adoration.

Both times after I took that first bite of Pho, I felt my unborn child move in my womb. No joke. I wasn't sure if I'd felt fetal movement before, but the kid loved the pho and decided to let me know. Oh! Yes, we are expecting. This is the first time I've mentioned it on the blog. If all goes as planned, we'll have our baby in December.

After eating the Pho the second time, we left the restaurant. I was just thinking of how excited I was to tell everyone about the Pho and the baby kicks, and then I looked down and there on the ground was a fifty-dollar bill. No joke. The streets of New York paid for both meals.

The Boat

Immediately after the second pho-ntastic experience, we met my family on this cruise liner in Brooklyn.

We had a lovely family reunion on board Cunard's Queen Mary II.

Boston & Halifax

This cruise had two stops: Boston and Halifax. Boston was rather rainy and cold due to Hurricane Arthur. We spent most of our time inside foggy-windowed cars, busses, and restaurants.

Halifax, Nova Scotia was more fun. We debarked and enjoyed shenanigans around the old port city.

Then, back in NYC after the cruise, we took the last opportunity to hang out with the family for a while and enjoyed a nice, long, getting-a-bit-lost walk on and around the Brooklyn bridge. My sister hurt her knee and had to be carried part of the way.

Portland

From New York, Charming and I parted ways with the family, enjoyed a couple more days in the city, and then got on a plane bound for Portland, Oregon.

My dear college friend and travel buddy Elizabeth and her husband Chris had welcomed, just a few days before our arrival, their firstborn into the world. What a little bundle of heart-melting sweetness! I'm so thankful for getting to share this special time with Chris and Elizabeth and their tiny one.

Elizabeth and I both had the extreme good luck to fall in love with and marry devilishly handsome, virile men who do all the grocery shopping and cooking for the household. I know. You want to hit us. It is pretty awesome since we all know the corollary to "love covers a multitude of sins" is "a fresh baked loaf of sourdough bread covers a multitude of sins."

The guys talked sauces, charcuterie, and local produce. A friendship blossomed.

Chris took us out chasing waterfalls and showed us the splendid natural beauty of the area.

And of course there was lots of gorgeous hipster food, including the city's famous Voodoo Donuts (second photo down).

My weekend activity in Portland was the World Domination Summit, which was incredible, and which I will postpone writing about until later this month. For now, suffice it to say I rode in a hot air balloon.

San Francisco

After Portland, we jumped on a flight for San Francisco. This time, it was all about seeing family, friends, and enjoying my uncle's amazing electrified Cruzbikes.

Los Angeles

A few quick days in LA were next, and that trip was about seeing friends too. It's been more than two years since Charming and I have been together on the West Coast, where many of our friends and connections live.  We are so grateful we got to spend some time with these folks and even more who aren't pictured.

Back to Palestine on One of the Last Flights

This is a long post, and it doesn't even cover the whole trip - just some of the good stuff. I didn't even have time for the misadventures, the things the hurricane ruined, the arguments, the vomiting, the hurt feelings, the flight delays, the exhaustion.  There's always more to the story.

Shortly after we got back, flights into Tel Aviv from the states were grounded until further notice. We got back safely to Ramallah, preparing ourselves to try to understand exactly how bad things are. Things are indeed very bad in Gaza (although we are safe here). Israel's bombs and chemical weapons have killed and injured many children and civilians in Gaza, and likely more by the time I publish this. Thousands of people have been displaced. Remember our friend Osama from Gaza? He and his wife now have 28 people living in their apartment, and he says they will soon run out of water. This conflict needs to end, and it needs a truly peaceful and just resolution.

3 Ways to Give Back and Improve your Creativity

I was recently talking to a young photographer-filmmaker, and he was telling me that he planned to teach media classes to high schoolers at the same time as he was building his own career in media. I thought what a wonderful way to give back.

People tend to think of giving back as something unselfish they can do with their free time - something that will serve others. It's true that giving back requires thinking of others, and it's best done without expecting anything in return.

However, the secret about giving back is that it can also be a powerful booster for your creativity-based career. While I think it's important not to be entirely motivated by what you can personally gain from giving back, I do think there's nothing wrong with being partially motivated by what you will gain from giving back.

Here are three ways to give back, along with how they can help your creativity-based career:

1. Teach.

Whether you're volunteering or teaching for pay, something about the act of sharing your craft and art with others can help cement your own understanding of it, and even help you make breakthroughs in your art. Hint: Teach before you feel ready.

2. Write thank you notes.

Expressing gratitude to those you've helped you learn to be a better artist, or to those who've helped your career doesn't just make people feel good. It also serves to keep you and your art in the mind of people who may be able to help you by giving referrals or connections.

3.  Give your art away.

This has to be done strategically, so that the perceived value of your art doesn't decrease, but occasionally doing things for free can really serve a person or organization who needs what you have to give. And the bonus is that when you give something away for free, people feel indebted to you in a positive way; they want to help you and your career in any way they can. I always sell more books than usual after I give a bunch of books away, presumably because people who got it for free recommend my book to their friends, who then pay for it.

Bonus: Another way you can give back is by commenting on blogs like this one.  Can you think of a way to give back that I didn't list? Comment below for the benefit of all the readers.  Thank you!

Holy Land Sites: Nazareth and the Dome of the Rock

In late May and early June my dear friend Kimberly came to Palestine to visit us.

Kimberly is a friend I've known for a long time - since before our first year of college when I called her in the summer of 2003 to find out what kind of person my future roommate was. I knew we'd be friends when I found out she drove a car that she'd painted the exterior of, covering it completely in brightly colored flowers. She still an artist; now she's a professional painter and muralist. And one of my favorite people in the whole world.

Of course, since this is her first time to the Middle East, we made sure she got to experience plenty of Holy Land sites around Israel and Palestine during her two-week trip. Many of the places we went have been covered previously on this blog, but we did take her to two places that were new to me: the Dome of the Rock in the Old City of Jerusalem, and the Palestinian city of Nazareth in Israel.

Photo credit goes to Kimberly for almost all the pictures in this post.

The Dome of the Rock

Commonly confused with Al-Aqsa Mosque (which has a silver dome) the Dome of the Rock is the famous gold-domed shrine on the Temple Mount in the Old City of Jerusalem. You can see the dome behind Kimberly in this photo.

Only Muslims are allowed on the Temple Mount and in the Dome of the Rock, except for during limited visiting hours. Getting to the Old City of Jerusalem is difficult enough that planning to be there during certain hours simply hadn't happened for me previously. However, during Kimberly's visit, we made it happen. The guards told us the visiting hours on our first trip to the old city, and on the second, we experienced the Temple Mount.

First we walked up the wooden footbridge over the Western Wall.

We encountered a stack of riot gear on the way.

At this point we were in the center of the center of one of the most religiously turbulent places in the world. Through the wooden slats, we peered down upon the holiest place in Judaism, the Western Wall, the only remaining piece of the Temple. Ahead of us lay the Dome of the Rock.

The Dome of the Rock is a sacred site in Islam because tradition says that miracles occurred there, including the Prophet Muhammad's ascension into heaven. Additionally the Foundation Stone around which the Dome of the Rock is built is sacred to Jews as it's considered to be the foundation of the Temple and was the location of the Holy of Holies.

All this results in a strange simmering stew of resentment for members of both religions. On the day we were there, tourists wandered curiously around circles of robed Muslim women who sternly yelled religious chants from texts they held their hands. Some of the tourists appeared to be Jewish, and some were pretending to be Muslim so they could enter the shrine.

One Muslim friend told me he was praying at the Dome of the Rock and a bunch of female Jewish Israeli tourist soldiers entered the male prayer area without appropriate clothing. Apparently the Israeli army uses its military power over the region even to the point of openly disrespecting one of the holiest places in Islam.

Kimberly and I were both labeled as non-Muslims by the guard in front of the shrine, presumably because our heads weren't covered. We weren't allowed to enter, but it wasn't clear whether that was because we weren't Muslim or because we weren't dressed properly. To the guard, it seemed to be the same thing. We circled the shrine and consulted with some tourists who had seen another group of tourists who were allowed to enter.  They told us you had to "pass" as Muslim to enter. We were unwilling to lie about our religion, but very willing to dress differently, and that seemed to be all that mattered to the guard. We donned scarves and tried again, only to be turned back because we were wearing t-shirts that showed our elbows.

I'm 80% sure we would've been allowed to enter if we'd covered everything but our face, hands, and feet, so if you are a female non-Muslim who'd like to visit, make sure you dress accordingly.

Kimberly and I had to settle for walking around the grounds of the magnificent shrine.

It was truly spectacular.

Nazareth

Nazareth is famous for being the birthplace of Jesus. We toured the Church of the Annunciation, where tradition says Mary received a message from the Angel Gabriel that she would give birth to Jesus.

I loved the courtyard of the church, where portraits of Madonna with child hung, each from a different country, and reflecting a different idea of Mary's appearance. My favorites were Thai Mary and Chinese Mary.

The church is new, so very different in appearance from traditional churches I'm used to visiting. I was happily surprised to discover that the modern interior was warm and soaring. The multiple levels and open central area allowed the chanting from the ongoing Greek Orthodox service to waft up to tourists on the floor above.

None of the photos captured the beauty of the interior, so you'll just have to go visit the church yourself to see it. Here's a sneak peak of the ceiling.

More Fun

Here are a few more photos taken around Israel and Palestine that I can't resist adding.

Kimberly got to see a herd of camels,

enjoy the Dead Sea and mud,

and see the Church of the Sepulchre.

Juthour Arboretum

I also took Kimberly to Juthour Arboretum, our neighbor's project to preserve the natural heritage of Palestine.

They've made incredible progress on the Arboretum over the past year, and now are running an Indie Go Go campaign to raise funds to forge a sustainable, green Palestine. Please support it below. It's a great cause, and a politically neutral one.

 That's Just Wrong

I'll end on a funny note, which is a hilarious onesie we saw when we were shopping for a mutual friend who is having a baby. When clothing with English on it is produced and sold in countries where English isn't widely spoken, this plane-wreck of a fashion situation is what can happen.

Yes, that's for real.

Thanks for a wonderful visit, Kimberly.

Looking at Hot Models: Creative Success through Mentorship

Think for a moment about the big creative dreams that make you feel amazing. Are you writing? Painting? Making abundant money from selling your creative work to an enthusiastic audience? Perhaps you sigh and think about why you aren't there yet. Maybe you have some fears or concerns that are getting in your way. Maybe you saw someone else succeed at cost to their family or health.

This is where mentorship comes in.  It's very hard to do something that we've never seen anyone else do.  Creative success on your terms becomes easier to achieve in direct proportion to the number of people in your life who are modeling the kind of success you desire.

Yet it's quite rare to have these models around you naturally. If you, say, you grew up in a family of rock stars, and you want to be a rock star, you are very lucky. Rock stardom will come much easier to you than to someone who has only seen rock stars from the mosh pit.

Most of us need to do a little bit of (fun) work to create mentorship in our lives. It's pretty easy.

I've boiled it down to three steps.

1. Find some hot models to look at.

No, not the Victoria's Secret kind, unless you aspire to design lingerie or walk the runway. Find people in your creative sphere who are on fire - whose success you want to emulate.  You probably already have someone in mind, perhaps the person who inspired your to get into your field in the first place.

2.  Do more research.

Often the first people who come to mind, upon closer inspection, don't have exactly the kind of success you'd like. Say there's an artist who's work you L-O-V-E, but you discover that he's deeply depressed and drinks heavily. That's probably not a lifestyle you see as optimal for yourself. So look for artists who are successful, happy, and healthy. They aren't hard to find once you scratch through the surface of the cultural stereotype of the drunk, depressed writer or artist.

Follow these folks you find on Twitter, bookmark their websites, and support their work in any way you can. Read up on anything you can find about the way they get the work done while maintaining a happy, balanced life. Soak in their example until what they've achieved starts to seem normal and do-able to you. Even if you never meet them, their example can do wonders for your own career.

3. Connect to a mentor.

Ideally, you connect to a mentor and build a supportive friendship so that you can learn directly from someone whose example you'd like to follow. However, in the real world, it's not always possible to build a friendship with someone who may be  in another country or simply too busy to take on a new protege. In these cases, your mentor can be a coach or simply a supportive person in your life who is willing to listen, encourage you, and be consistently positive about your ideas and goals. A good coach or mentor is someone who asks about how your creative work is going and helps you stay excited, motivated, and laser focused on the next step to take in the direction of your dreams.

Here are some good guidelines to keep in mind as you communicate with a mentor.

• There's no need to use the word "mentor" until your relationship is well established and has lasted years. It's a serious word and using it too early is kind of like proposing marriage on the first date.
• You may want to consider paying to be part of a mentorship program or hiring a coach who has helped other people achieve results similar to what you desire in your life. This is true especially if you work from home or work alone a lot, as those conditions make it harder to mix with people in your industry.
• If possible, make contact with more than one mentor and make sure you mention it to your other mentors. Some of my best mentee experiences have resulted by my letting a mentor know that I'm also working with another brilliant mind in the industry/area. It helps the mentor know that you are making connections and are ambitiously pursuing excellence.
• You job is to ask questions and listen. Don't use a mentor's time to complain; instead, ask for his or her advice about challenges you are facing and then give them an update about that challenge next time you meet.

Email Template

Finally, here's an example email template you can use to reach out to someone you admire. Make sure you customize it to your voice and personality.

Dear ______,

I'm a big admirer of your _________ and you inspire me especially in the way you ____________, _____________ all while _____________. (Specific qualities you've noticed.)

I'm a writer/artist/creator myself, and I'd love to know more about how you _______________________. Specifically, ______(One specific question they can answer in 5 minute or less.)

Thanks for being such an inspiration.

Regards,

If you get a response, feel free to send more brief questions. Be yourself and be ready to think creatively about how you can make their advice work for you.

8 Steps to Declutter Your Career

This is a guest post by Australia-based career coach and consultant Caroline De Kimpe. Enjoy. - Genevieve

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Simplifying your job increases productivity, effectiveness and achievements.

And guess what?  Simplifying is exactly what will help you land that promotion or get a salary increase.

When I first came to Australia I had one suitcase full of cloths and toiletry. Since I arrived (in 2006) I moved 5 times and like most people, each time I took the opportunity to throw away “stuff” I wasn’t using any more, to declutter and prepare for a fresh home.

Still, each time I had more boxes to move.

It’s similar in our career.  Our first job is very straight forward and (most of the time) we don’t have high expectations and stress. As we climb the ranks, we have bigger teams, projects, more responsibilities and are faced with more politics. This goes often hand in hand with longer working hours and more stress.

Each time we gain a new role and we increase our responsibilities, we automatically increase the expectations we have of others and ourselves.

When it becomes too much and we feel overwhelmed our performance will start to decline, our health will go backwards and, more often than not, we'll be in a bad mood all the time.

All of which will create more stress and unhappiness.

Getting Rid of What Doesn't Serve You

Just like when you move house, once in a while, you need to declutter and throw away what doesn’t serve you anymore in your career. You have gained more roles, and with that greater responsibilities and expectations and to manage them as effective and efficient as possible you need to re-balance.

I believe a simple and effective way to start balancing your life again is to simplify as much as you can.

These are my top 8 tips to simplify your job or career:

• Open calendar (and closed door) policy. To make sure you don’t get distracted all the time you need to make yourself less accessible to everyone. Ask your team members to book a time with you to discuss their problems and challenges instead of disturbing you every 5 seconds.
• Set boundaries  – decide how much time and energy you spend on specific task.
• Clean – have a clean work space.
• Make time for yourself. Take does lunch breaks! You need to simplify from the inside out: your thinking, your decisions and your actions. Making time for yourself will give you clarity to do so.
• One task, one focus - try to avoid too much multitasking; it often creates “starts with no finishes”.
• Create an efficient system or routine.
• Have a “one pager:" a business plan, sales plan, life plan, goal plan etc.  Make it one page (or a one page summary) – much easier to follow and to keep with you.
• Don’t complicate if it’s not necessary; choose the easiest way when possible and appropriate.

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Caroline De Kimpe is a career transformation coach for men and women who have a corporate job and want to break out of their rut and transform their ordinary job into their dream career. Visit her website here.

10 Steps to Self-Publishing Success

I want you to know how easy this is, because the internet can be a confusing place, distorting the simplicity of making money from your creative work. Also, opportunities come and go, and it's very hard to gauge whether opportunities in the world of self-publishing are legitimate or not.  I'm here to tell you that you can write and widely publish a book with zero marketing budget. You can do this, and here's how. I welcome questions about this process and ask that you please post them as a comment on this blog post. That way, other people can learn from your question. I promise, if you are curious about something or confused by something, someone else shares your query.

Let's get started.

When deciding to become a published author, I saw two possible paths:

1. Write a book proposal (a new skill for me that would've meant hours of learning), and send query letters to dozens of publishers, hoping that some intern would select my proposal from the slush pile and think "yeah, minimalism for grandparents!" I could wait months or even years for a book deal, and then finally get one, eventually signing a mediocre contract allowing me a small cut of the profits.

2. I could get started writing the book right away. I could spend my precious time on this planet writing valuable content for thousands of people, not proposals or query letters that one person would see, if I was lucky.  I could have my books in the hands of my intended audience in less than a year through self-publishing.  I could use the magic of the internet for free promotion and then keep a large portion, or all of the profits.

Obviously, I chose #2.

And I've  been so glad that I did. It's outrageous that would-be authors are expected to spend hours of their time sucking up to publishing executives -- an impossibly narrow bottle neck. It's not a system that allows quality to get through. It's a system that is almost entirely lottery.

Did you know that the average nonfiction book published (self-published or traditional) in the US sells only about 250 copies per year? My books are now in the hands (more accurately, on the Kindles and iPads) of about 20,000 people. And that's just the number from the past 3 months.  Not all of those people bought my book. Most got it for free. That means my royalties are modest. I just checked my royalties for the past 7 days -- $300.  Although as far as I can tell, my royalties have been increasing steadily by month, after a tiny launch in December 2013. Royalties only show signs of increasing as more and more people read by book and tell their friends about it.

Several hundred dollars coming in month after month could be a life-changing, attitude changing, game-changing amount for a first-time author who needs some encouragement that his or her book royalties can eventually ramp up to form a full-time income.

Search the web for "self-publishing advice" and you'll instantly be confronted with lugubrious warnings about the outlook for self-publishers. The main problem? No one buys your book because no one knows about it. The idea is that traditional publishers, with their large marketing budgets, can bring your book the attention it deserves. And for a few lucky books a year, the system works. But the sad reality is that for the average author, the system fails. The publishers fail to do enough to put books in enough hands to create the best marketing: word-of-mouth.

So how did I get my book out to 20,000 + people when my marketing budget was about nill?

I'm here to save lives and careers.

I'm ready to share the secret, so that other first-time authors can quit chasing the rainbow of publishing houses and start changing lives with their writing. Rejection used to be a normal part of the job for authors.  Collecting rejection slips may be responsible for the high rate of alcoholism and suicide among writers. More poignantly, I believe it causes most budding writers to just give up.  So I'm here to save lives and careers. I want you to express your creativity, to create a work that will speak to someone, and I want you to get it out there into the world as soon as possible. Here's how.

The Step-by-Step Process:

1. Write your book.

It has to be good. The only way to tell if it's good is to get feedback from others, so gather a team of supportive yet honest beta readers who are interested in your topic or genre.

2. Rewrite your book.

Re-write your book keeping the feedback of your beta readers in mind, but ultimately listening to your own intuition. (Not your ego. Learn the difference.)

3. Have someone else copy edit your book.

Don't do this yourself, even if you're a professional copy editor. You won't be able to see typos. It's not your fault. The brain is wired to skip over things it thinks it knows already, so you are incapable of seeing errors in your own text if you know what you intended to write.

4. Have a cover designed.

Look up the cover specifications for Kindle Direct Publishing and have a cover designed. I designed my cover myself because I didn't have the budget to hire a designer, but eventually I'll have it redone by a professional.

5. Upload your book using Kindle Direct Publishing.

I used Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) to publish my books. Here's why:

• Even if your book is written in Microsoft Word, Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) will format it into a .mobi file for easy reading on Kindle. This process takes about 15-30 minutes. You submit it for review, and 12 hours later people can purchase it on Amazon.com
• Other companies that let you get your electronic book out there (i.e, e-junkie and various book selling sites) do negligible marketing for you.
• The Amazon website internal marketing machine is more powerful than all other booksellers combined, especially if you use Kindle Select.
• Anyone in the US (and many other countries) can purchase your book, whether or not they have a Kindle.

6. Enroll your book in Kindle Select.

Kindle Select is an optional program within Kindle Direct Publishing that involves exclusivity with Amazon. You cannot sell or offer your book in electronic form anywhere else for the three months your book is in the program. (Or more, if you re-enroll, which I recommend.) It's completely worth it IF you are a beginning author with a small audience. Here's why:

• As I wrote above, none of the other booksellers are worth your time when you can instantly get your book to so many people through Amazon.
• Kindle Select allows you to run promotions and free days. They internally market your promotion days, so that hundreds or thousands of people download your books, leading to the all-important word-of-mouth affect.
• You get higher royalties on international sales.
• Enrolling in Kindle Select also means people enrolled in the Kindle Owners Lending Library program can borrow your book for free, allowing your book to get into even more hands.

When might Kindle Select not be worth it? When you already have a large email list of thousands of eager fans ready to buy your book. In that case, you may be better off selling your book directly to your fans and keeping 100% of the profits.  Even then, you may want to enroll your book in Kindle Select after you've offered the book directly to your audience for a few months and given them the first opportunity to buy it. This will allow you to reach even more people while still having your initial launch be to your biggest fans and best customers.

7. Run free days promotions.

You can run two types of promotion on with Kindle Select: free days and discount days. I have only experimented a little with discount days because free days seem to be working so well. You want to schedule your free days for at least two weeks in advance so you have time to build excitement and spread the word in your community.

8. Publicize your free days to book lovers.

While Amazon will do some internal marketing for your book, you want to give your free days the best possible shot at reaching a huge audience. Again, I'm on a budget, so I look for free ways to do this. My favorite is the Author Marketing Club.  With a free membership, you can use a tool they have that lists a bunch of websites for book lovers. Use the tool to reach out to the folks who run these websites, tell them about your free day, and often they will tell their audiences about it. Many of these websites have a simple form you fill in with your book's information. For others, you need to shoot them an email.  Make sure you tell your personal network about your free day as well.

9. Edit your book anytime.

This is something I really love about KDP. If a reader points out a typo, or you think of something you left out of the book, it's really easy to upload an edited book document. You'll be done in 5 minutes, with no disruption to your book's listing on Amazon. After publishing Minimalist Living, I realized that I hadn't given people enough incentive to sign up for my email list on my website, so I edited it to include the benefits of signing up for my email list. My subscriptions increased.  I can even go back and change the cover any time I want to.

10. Renew your Kindle Select enrollment, and keep having and promoting free days.

Authors consistently see a spike in sales immediately after free days. This is probably because a bunch of people hear about the book and are intrigued, but have missed the free days. Or because people get the book for free, and then recommend that their friends check it out. It's very important that free days are only occasional and very special. That way the integrity of the value of your book is maintained. Don't make the mistake of giving away your book too often. However, most people, I think, err on the side of not giving their book away enough, meaning that their book never gains traction. I think the Kindle Select program hits the right balance for you.

That's it!

That's it! It's that easy.

Problems with Amazon

I should add that while I love Amazon and the programs they have for authors, it hasn't been an entirely perfect experience. Amazon uses an algorithm to remove fake reviews, but it's flawed, so that sometimes real reviews get deleted too. This can be especially frustrating to a first-time author. You can go from having 5 reviews to having 2 without understanding why. Since reviews help you get more reviews, the beginning can be a little slow going if Amazon removes the few reviews you do have.

The second frustration I've encountered is that my book isn't available globally. It's available to those who hold a credit card based in a bank in the US, Canada, and a small group of other countries. This means that my friends in the Middle East can't download it. I'm not sure why, but I think it has something to do with local publishing laws.

Despite these problems, Amazon KDP is overwhelmingly worth it for self-publishing authors. It's so far above the competition that at this time, no other options are worth considering.

Sit Down and Write!

The hardest part of this whole thing, is of course, writing the book. Get to it!

My First Trip to Gaza

Foreword: I'm re-posting this old blog entry about my first trip to Gaza because somehow it disappeared entirely from Packing Lust, probably during the transition from my last blogging service to Wordpress, the one I use now. It's one of my favorites, so I was so sad when I thought it was lost to the void forever. (I didn't have a back up of the text, just the photos). However, Prince Charming managed to find an archive of it online, despite my deleting the old blog before I knew it had gone missing. "Nothing can completely disappear from the internet," he says. (I now back up my blog regularly.) This was originally posted December 18, 2012. Enjoy.

Entry at Erez

"You're not a journalist or anything, are you?" the Israeli soldier in the first booth at Erez Crossing Point asked.

"No." But will I write about what I see? Of course. 

Until the New York Times picks up this blog, I am not a journalist. I am free to enter the Gaza Strip through the Erez Crossing thanks to Prince Charming's NGO-worker status and my status as his wife.  And from this unique position, needing neither journalist's credentials, nor being blocked from writing by my organization (as Prince Charming is), I can simply tell you  what I experienced on my first, short trip to Gaza.

Not  that it was simple for me to get into Gaza. First, an employee at Charming's NGO got me coordination with the Israel government and a visa with Hamas, the governing body of Gaza.

We arrived at Erez Crossing on December 12th.

I put my camera away since there was a "no photography" sign at the entrance. The crossing looks like one modern, airy, new airport terminal. It's a large building with a lot of bullet-proof glass and shiny surfaces.  We entered after a quick chat with the Israeli soldier who asked if I was a journalist. Then there was an interview with a passport control officer who shuffles papers and flips through every passport. Like many passport officers, she had shimmering, perfectly manicured nails. I think if I were a passport officer, I would too. The only thing there is for a would-be border-crosser to do as you shuffle, flip, and make phone calls is to stare at your hands.

At this point, I need to introduce Osama, one of Charming's colleagus in Gaza. Osama is a Palestinian who lives in Gaza and he is rarely allowed out of the strip. However, he was allowed to visit the West Bank for his job for the first time in a while, and when we went to Gaza, he re-entered with us to rejoin his family.

 "Back to jail!" Osama said merrily as we entered Gaza.

Once across the border, we caught a special golf cart we called a tuk tuk that took us across a kilometer of open land that acts as a sort of "no-man's-land" between Israel and the administration of the Gaza border.

The covered path across no-man's-land.

The tuk tuk is officially for handicapped people, but if it's open, anyone can use it. Charming remarked that the tuk tuk driver has one of the weirdest jobs in the world. Can you imagine when someone asks "what do you do," saying "I drive a golf cart back and forth across the one kilometer separating two countries in conflict."

We then got out at a checkpoint known as Hamsa Hamsa or Five Five, in English. It's run by Fatah, the political party in charge of the Palestinian National Authority, which is the name of the government of Palestine.  The Fatah checkpoint is only there because  Israel won't talk to Hamas, the political party governing Gaza. Hamas is considered by Israel, the U.S., Canada, the E.U., and Japan to be a terrorist organization. While they seem more humane than other extremist Islamic groups, say the Taliban (who tried to kill  Malala Yousafzai), it's their habit of firing rockets indiscriminately into Israel gets them labeled as terrorists.

After the buffer zone of Hamsa Hamsa, we reached Arba Arba (Four Four in English) by cab. Arba Arba is run by Hamas. We picked up our previously arranged paperwork and Hamas officials searched our bags. Cars from the Gaza office arrived and I met more Gaza staff members (of Charming's NGO).

During our twenty minutes at Arba Arba, a magical moment happened. 12/12/12 at 12:12. Charming and I got a photo to memorialize:

Gaza City

After these three different checkpoints, we arrived in Gaza City. Osama pointed out some of the destruction from the recent conflict. One thing that struck me was the precision of the attacks. Of course the Israelis made mistakes (see above note about children killed) but for the most part, (if we allow ourselves to sweep away the image of 35 dead children with that phrase) Netanyahu kept his promise when he said "...my government has instructed the Israeli Defense Forces to conduct surgical strikes against the terrorist infrastructure in Gaza."

A surgical strike in Gaza City.

Another precision strike leaves a nearby palm tree and a mosque untouched.

Destruction in Gaza City.

More wreckage in Gaza.

As we drove into the city, Osama greeted a fellow commuter he knew.

The people in Gaza use a lot of donkeys and horses for transportation and conducting business.

A special export of Palestine is the strawberry. When I tasted my first strawberry here, it was as if I had never tasted a strawberry before. Charming says the Dutch import them from Gaza and the fields are treated with great care and expertise.

Once we arrived, Lulu, the office receptionist, kindly drove me around Gaza City so I could see the sights. Having already seen a lot of destruction, I was eager to see the beach.

Enjoying the sight of the sea in Gaza.

It was lovely, this portion of the beach having had a walkway put in by Jawwal, our cell phone service provider. There were horses galloping along the water's edge. You can see them tiny in the background of the above photo.

But after that nice photo, I have to show you what happened before we saw the beach, before we had even left the street in front of Charming's office. As Lulu began to drive in front of Charming's organization,  a group of men jumped out of a nearby car, and seemed to attack the car in front of us. Men jumped and were pulled out of that car. I didn't have time to feel scared. I snapped a couple photos.

Lulu, composure and smile perfectly intact, backed up, and turned off onto another street. I simply thought the incident it was a bit of road rage on the under-construction, traffic-clogged byway. It wasn't until writing this blog post that I noticed the large knife in the brown-jacketed man's hand in the second photo. Was this a car jacking? A car burglary?

The second photo.

Maybe this explains why, a bit later, Lulu said "you don't seem scared. Some foreigner are afraid to be here." I was thrilled to be somewhere warm and sunny with an ocean view. I didn't think much about the underbelly attributes of Gaza until I was out.

Lulu took me to her future home, a fourth floor condo still under construction.

Lulu in her future condo building.

View from Lulu's future home.

We drove by the Gaza City fishing port.

Like a scene out of a Tom Waits movie, near the center of town there was an abandoned circus.  I wondered if I'd see a lion or trapeze artist roaming town, feeling lost.

Finally, my tour ended at Lulu's family home where I met her mother, two out of seven sisters,  and her brother. We had coffee and cookies served on a tray decorated with hand-embroidered cloth.

Rafah

Later that evening, we drove with Osama and Arwa down the coast to Rafah, which is on Gaza's border with Egypt. Tunnels connect Rafah to Egypt, and Osama said "Everything you see came in through the tunnels." The streets were filled with the same early-model Mercedes that most of the population drove, making Rafah feel like we were in a movie set in the 60's.

On the way to Rafah, we stopped at a fish restaurant splendidly located with a view of the water. The only sign I saw said "Fish Frsh." Fish Frsh kept live fish in large pools fed from the nearby ocean.

Patrons can attempt to net their own fish for their own dinner plate. I tried, as  Prince Charming, Osama, and Arwa looked on.

I failed. Osama said he'd never been successful either. One of the employees got down into the tank and netted us a couple of fresh fish, one of which showed up on my plate 20 minutes later.

We had a wonderful time chatting and laughing over dinner with Osama and his wife Arwa. Osama is a big fan of argila, which is a very popular hobby/habit/vice all over Palestine. It's also called sheesha, hookah, or, affectionately, hubbly bubbly.  We laughed over the fact that extreme Muslims frown on women smoking argila in public because it looks suggestive. Of what? Oh dear, the culture is far too genteel for anyone to actually say what it might be suggestive of. I'll leave it up to you to guess.

Many thanks to Osama and Arwa for being such generous and warm hosts who genuinely seem to love their adopted home, (they are descendants of refugees) yet are honest, educated, and well-traveled enough to rue the fact that they are stuck in Gaza unless they can get jobs overseas. Osama would want you to know that his favorite meal in the whole world is Kentucky Fried Chicken, and he wants peace for many reasons, but partly because he really wants Gaza to get the franchise. He also speaks with enthusiasm about how resilient the Palestinians living in Gaza are. Seriously, I can hardly overstate how  kind, hospitable, and tolerant Osama and Arwa are. I wish them the best and hope for peace and all the opportunities they could ever want for themselves and their family.

Ladies Brunch

Prince Charming's office in Gaza is majority male, and so the next day the few ladies at the office invited me to brunch with them at a restaurant in Gaza City overlooking the ocean. I always ask permission before featuring anyone on the blog (except men who attack the car in front of me) but a few of the women at the brunch didn't feel comfortable appearing here, so the only photo I'll show you is of the view of the ocean when it started raining in the middle of brunch.

Apparently, it only rains a few times a year in Gaza, so this event was cause for great joy. The women got up and rushed to the window, opening it and putting their hands out to touch the rain. One of them told me "If you ask Allah for anything while it rains, he will give it to you."  Another said that as a romantic, she loved to walk in the rain.

As you know, I'm coming from Ramallah, where it's been cold and rainy for weeks. I was surprised at their enthusiasm  and then remembered how rare rain was in L.A., and how I'd felt a similar sense of blessing being poured from the sky when it rained there. I sat back and enjoyed the sound of the rain as it poured loudly on the roof of the restaurant where we sat warm and dry.

At the brunch, and several times throughout my visit to Gaza, I tried to find out about the details of the traumas and miseries of a) being in Gaza during the strikes, and b) being a woman in Gaza. My leading questions were not met with complaints or tales of woe.  Lulu told me that the day after the ceasefire, everyone was arranging parties and gatherings. Osama drove by a group of men playing soccer by the beach and said "Is this resilience or what!" Others echoed those sentiments. The people of Gaza want to be happy and to have peace just like any other people in the world. They want outsiders to see that they are caring, strong, resilient, and hopeful.  They try to see the blessing in the rain.

Exiting Gaza

Getting back into Israel from Gaza was a lengthier process than going in. We quickly passed through Arba Arba and Hamsa Hamsa, this time walking the kilometer from Hamsa Hamsa to the Erez terminal.  (The tuk tuk wasn't around.) We walked through large turnstile doors, and then into a room with two large tables. The only direct contact one has with any Israelis during the process is with passport control. In this room, we couldn't see anyone, but Charming told me to open my bags and show them to a camera. The soldiers watching must have been okay with the contents of my bag, because a green light flashed on one of several entry doors, meaning I could go in. Charming and I entered a warren of small chambers separately. Nothing happened in my first chamber, except the light turned green, and I passed into a second, identical chamber. The red light turned green, but when I pressed the door, it didn't open. Someone uttered something in Hebrew that I didn't understand. I tried again, then realized I'd been pressing on the wall, not the door. I found the door, and it allowed me to pass into a luggage checking station. Again, I wasn't sure where to go, but when I looked up, I saw officials looking down on us from a glassed-in upper level. They motioned to me where I should go. Via this system of cameras, speakers, bullet-proof glass, and compartments, the Israeli officials are kept safe from would-be attackers.

We loaded our bags onto a conveyer belt, and another light turned green, allowing us to pass into the room where we picked up our luggage. We only had one more obstacle to get through: passport control. "What's your father's name?" The same well-manicured lady asked. I told her, and she said "What's your grandfather's name?" "Which one?" "You father's father." I told her, and she let me back into Israel. Charming's interview lasted much longer, about an hour.  He and the nice-finger-lady chatted, and then he was sent back into the terminal to wait. Finally, after another chat, they let him through. His current passport/visa/paperwork situation is complicated and it took a while for the soldiers to ascertain the legitimacy of his papers. Once they did, we were free to re-enter Israel with a  dual sense of gratitude and guilt for those we left behind.

Top 10 Food Blogs for Foodies

No  post and email from me today,  partly due to the insanity of tax day for my U.S. readers. In case you are checking, here's a consolation prize: Top 10 Food Blogs for Foodies from LifeScoop. Enjoy.

If You're Thinking of Starting a Creativity-Based Business...

I wrote this self-coaching guide for Fairy Tale Life (before I moved my creativity coaching to Packing Lust) to help you decide whether you should start a business as a writer, artist, photographer, performer, designer, or any business where you will be offering a product or a service that you create or co-create.

 The outcome we are aiming for here is for you to make a decision to:

a) Start a creativity-based business as soon as possible.

b) Start a creativity-based business on a specific date in the future.

c) Not start a creativity based business at this time.

If you are considering starting a business with a partner, make sure both of you answer the questions individually, and then discuss your answers together.

THE QUESTIONS

1. Do I believe in myself?

I don't just mean this in a Disney musical sort of way. It's not just about believing you are a good person with talent. It's about trusting your ideas, skills, gifts, and ability to grow.  It's about believing in yourself when no one else does.There will always be times when other people validate your work, but when those people aren't around, or when other people criticize, you are your most important validator and encourager.  Can you find things to love about your work? Also, can you believe in your ability to persevere while you close the gap between the quality you aspire to and the quality you actually produce? This is the gap Ira Glass refers to when he says "It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions."

2. Am I growth and learning-oriented?

The first place this applies will be in your market research, that is, in talking to and learning from potential customers, clients, or fans.  Are you open to your business not looking exactly like you first envisioned? Can you learn about what people really want and need and apply those lessons to your business?

Can you build new habits that will at first feel uncomfortable or scary? Do you have the can-do attitude that is summed up in Marie Forleo's mantra "everything is figureoutable?"  Do you love to learn about how to improve your work and your business?

3. am I sincerely focused on and committed to this idea?

In the first question, you asked about your belief in yourself. The opposite of belief is doubt, and self-doubt is a powerful killer of dreams. The best way to combat self-doubt isn't through willpower to stop negative thoughts, but rather, the willpower to focus on your art and your vision of your business as you build it. Once you've researched your business idea, and made sure there is a possible audience for what you do, you've got to fully commit and focus. Doubt will certainly come up if you are human, but your focus and commitment need to be stronger than that doubt.

4. Can I help people connect?

Seth Godin writes, "In the connection economy, there's a dividing line between two kinds of projects: those that exist to create connections, and those that don't."

As an artist, your job is to create the work. As an artist who is also building a business, your job is to help people connect over the work. Do you feel comfortable in this role? Can you answer questions, foster conversations, and reveal your process enough to make people feel connected to you? Will your projects create connections?

5. Can I make the space?

To run a business, you will need to make physical space and time space. You'll need to actively manage your time, which often means using a calendar.  It means prioritizing chunks of time in which you will work with focused effort on your business. It means finding & paying for childcare if necessary. It means clearing out a room, closet, or other space where you will work.

6. Do I honor commitments to myself and others?

Danielle LaPorte says that the secret to success is to do what you say you are going to do. Of course, this is a high standard, and life is full of opportunities for white lies. (Did you really keep in touch with everyone whose high school yearbook you wrote in?) But language is powerful, and if people don't trust your words, or if you don't even trust your own words, then your business may falter.  Can you keep appointments and be on time, or communicate clearly if you have to cancel? Can you deliver products or services when you state that you will? Can you stick to your policies even when they are inconvenient?

7. Am I open to suggestions and ideas without being overwhelmed by them?

There's a delicate line between being open to growth and opportunity and staying focused on creating your vision. You have to learn to walk that line. If you are too open to every new thing that comes into your landscape, you could get overwhelmed and creatively stuck. Yet if you shut your eyes to all new ideas, you may miss out an important life or business opportunity. Have you developed your own personal sifting process so that when new ideas come in, you can implement, discard, or save for later?

8. Do I have the support of a few people close to me?

It's true that not everyone in your life - or even in your family - may understand what you are up to when you choose to start a new business. That's okay. But I believe that you need to have at least one or two close friends or family members in your corner who believe in you and are cheering you on. Bonus points if your romantic partner is on board. You supporters will be there to give you pep talks when you lag, sympathy when the going gets tough, and ideas when you feel uninspired.

9. Do I have savings, a good bridge job, or some other way of staying out of debt while I build my business?

While businesses can grow quickly, it's common that in the beginning they cost more money than they bring in. And if you don't have a built-in audience that you've already cultivated, then give yourself plenty of time to gain fans or clients.  In the mean time, you'll need a way to keep paying the bills. You could save up (the amount will vary depending on your budget and your business), you could keep working in your current job, or you could get a bridge job. A bridge job is one that covers the bills but doesn't drain your creative energy.  It helps if your bridge job meets a need for you that your business doesn't. For example, if you are an artist who spends long hours alone in the studio, an ideal bridge job might be bar tending to meet your need to socialize.  Your spouse or partner also might agree to take care of the bills for a time while you build your business. Finally there are artist communes and artist housing projects worth looking into where your cost of living could be very low.

10. Do I have a clear purpose in life that I know on a deep level and is this business connected to it?

I know, this last question is a doozy. But I believe that without a sense of purpose, life is less fun and less meaningful.  I love how Mark Twain puts it: "The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why."  Your purpose can be in a 10-page mission statement, or in one word, such as "love," but you need one and it needs to resonate deeply with you.  Your purpose may change or evolve with time. Do you know your purpose? If so, how is your business idea connected to your purpose? Running a business takes as much time as you are willing to give it, and that time will be more fun and fulfilling if you can identify every day why what you're doing matters.

 Let's Talk about Yesses!

How many yesses did you have? Did you say "yes" to all ten questions? If so, congratulations! You may be ready to start a creativity-based business! If not, can you work on turning any no's into yesses? If so, your decision can be to delay starting a business until a certain date in the future. I believe self-doubt can torture entrepreneurs, and is the greatest killer of new businesses and new ideas. I wrote this post to help you make a strong decision and vanquish self-doubt. Now that you've answered these questions, I hope that any doubts you have about your decision to start a new business are gone, and that you can move forward with confidence in your decision.

I wish you luck, fun, and magic in your new venture. Know that I am here cheering you on.

"Yessing" you all the way,

How to Be Where You Are When Wanderlust Distracts

So we just found out we are moving to the country of Comoros! Just kidding. April Fools. But for those of you who were thinking "What the bleep is Comoros?" Wikipedia's short answer is "a sovereign archipelago island nation in the Indian Ocean, located at the northern end of the Mozambique Channel off the eastern coast of Africa, between northeastern Mozambique and northwestern Madagascar." It also happens to be one of the globe's least populous nations, but one of the most densely populated. In other words, it's a tiny country packed with people.

Our Wanderlust

Okay, now that geography lesson is over, I want to delve into something personal  -- our psychology of wanderlust right now. Charming and I moved to Palestine in May and June of 2012, with plans to stay for the duration of Charming's two-year contract with his organization. Beyond two years, our stay was and is unknown. So that means in just a few months, we enter unplanned territory. And something weird happened to our mindset. It's weird and also weirdly familiar. When was the last time I had this feeling? The summer after my senior year of high school.

Spoiling the Nest

Let me start by saying that all of high school was an emotional roller coaster for me (and for everyone, I know) but I remember that by the time I graduated, my roller coaster was decidedly uncomfortable. I felt completely done with my hometown, my family, my friends, and anything I could possibly do for fun. My mom called it "spoiling the nest," and I certainly was. I was irritable and quick to complain. I lashed out and put distance between me and my loved ones. I was a bird who was ready to fly, but knew that to leave the comfort of the nest I had to convince myself that it was a boring place filled with stupid people. I needed the place and people to prove their negative attributes so that I could feel justified in leaving. I love my family, and my  hometown is filled with dear friends. So those things I harped on weren't true, but my subconscious started to make them feel true, so that when the time came to leave, I didn't hesitate.

Similarly, I noticed I have been complaining more than usual about Palestine. I've been snarking on the repressive atmosphere, the constant harassment, the shoddy business standards, everything right down to the broken hinge on our toilet seat. Even though I can find those things everywhere in the world, if I look hard enough.

The Wanderlust Timer

Nothing seemed fun or worth doing for a while. I racked my brain. What was wrong? And then I realized it. I was spoiling the nest. Even though we have no plans to leave this place, my brain had been thinking two years, two years, two years, for so long that it was like a timer started going off when two years approached. A timer that said, "Ok, prepare for the train to leave the station." The wanderlust timer.

But the truth is, we may be here for a while longer. We don't know. The widening chasm between my geographical location and my mental location called for a recent attitude shift to bring them back to the same place.

Getting My Joie Back

I did four things to get my joie de vivre back and get back to Palestine mentally, instead of being here and not being here.

1. I talked it over with some friends and realized what was going on.

2. I imagined that we made another two-year commitment here. What would I do? What new places would I see, activities would I try, friends would I make?

3. I centered by focusing on my deeper purpose in life which I can live out with enthusiasm absolutely anywhere in the world.

4. I took action on a couple of things relating to #2 and #3 and put some new adventures into motion. (With help from my friends.)

I think these steps or some variation of them could be helpful if you find yourself drifting to some other place mentally and that drifting is making your current location or job or relationship seem not quite the romantic place it once was.

What do you think? What do you do when you need to enjoy where you are a little more? Please share in the comments.

What's Next?

When our friends and family ask "What's next?" I really like being able to give a concrete answer to that question. But the truth is, we don't know right now, and we don't know how long we won't know.

So for the time being, I'm focusing on enjoying my springtime nest right here in Palestine.

All Are Valid

I'll close with this excerpt from Mark Manson that I read and enjoyed today. It's from his essay "Wanderlust."

"The more places you go the less any single one is likely to satisfy you. As with any purely external form of satisfaction, there’s a cruel diminishing returns to it. Yesterday’s exotic is today’s bore. Yesterday’s news is today’s history. It’s the core of any addictive behavior: you need more and more and more, until one day you need less. Or even worse, you die never having known enough.

The more you see and experience, the more you see the overlapping of personality across culture, you see the universality of daily human existence, the common denominator of nature, and you understand that joy and relationships too, are location-independent.

You (hopefully) begin to understand the reward for any journey must be the journey itself or nothing at all — the moments of airport tedium as well as the exaltation of the world’s highest monuments; the anxious anticipation of the unknown as well as the jaded boredom of routine; the vanity of indulging in prestige and class as well as the humility of the living among the most downtrodden and unfortunate. All are valid and necessary. All are their own steps upon the same path of your life."

- Mark Manson

Can You Be Minimalist With Kids?

Or is your house destined to look something like this during your child-rearing years?

Since publishing my book, Minimalist Living, and a few times pre-publication, I've gotten questions about how to live a minimalist lifestyle if you have kids. I didn't get into that topic in the book because a) we don't have kids yet and b) people willing to say they are successfully living a minimalist life with kids are few and far between.

From everything I've heard, the results of procreation are unpredictable. There's no way to know if you are going to give birth to neat-freak matching-sock-wearers, or if you are going to have a bunch of aspiring splatter artists. And if it's the latter, I'd be the last to tell you to crush their artistic dreams.

So let's turn to a minimalist parent who can speak to this mystery. I'm publishing portions of an email  she sent on the topic. Thanks so much to this anonymous parent who wrote the following.

Moving as a Method to Keep Clutter Minimal

Our situation over the past few years has really necessitated that we keep the clutter down, but I don't know if we would be good at it otherwise --We have dealt with three overseas moves for one-year positions, and each time we've mailed maybe one or two boxes mainly of [my husbands] books and papers, and everything else we brought had to fit into suitcases. We were always moving into furnished places, so they came stocked with just the basics-- dishes, cooking things, bedding, towels, so we were bringing clothes, things we needed to work, like laptops, and a few favorite toys for the kids. If we were in Europe coming back to the US or Canada, we also brought lots of books in German or French, as they would be hard to get here, and we want to keep up the kids' language skills. 

Traveling with the Maximum

I have to admit that we never really mastered packing light after we had kids.  Once or twice, when it was just the two of us, we traveled to Europe for a couple of weeks with just a regular-sized backpack each (the school kind, not the camping kind), but for our longer stays with the kids, we brought as much luggage as was allowed without being charged extra, and it was always a disaster because it was more than we could carry and especially tough to get on and off of trains when traveling from the airport to whereever we were living, especially when dealing with 3-4 small children, always a stroller, and once with both one in a stroller and one in a baby bijorn. But it always made us realize that once there, we really couldn't accumulate any more stuff since there would be no room to bring it along, but I found I have really enjoyed minimalist living, and having less toys and kid stuff does mean less trouble cleaning up.

What to Do About Toys

Now, we are still in a temporary situation, but instead of the furnished rental places that were our last three places to live, we are renting a home from a family on sabbatical, so much of their stuff is still in the house, (which they've lived in for years as the three kids have grown up), including so many toys--it's impossible to keep up with it!  In contrast, from 2010-2012, my kids' main playthings were a bunch of duplo legos and some small stuffed animal toys. But it was always enough to keep them entertained-- everyone liked to build things with the legos, and there were enough of them that everyone could have a project at once if they wanted. Usually the boys would build vehicles and then play with them. My older two children (now 9 and 7, but when we first moved in 2010 would have been 4 and 6), had about 4-5 beanie-baby sized animals and liked to act out imaginative stories with them, narrating their actions. Those two activities, plus reading and coloring made up just about all of their indoor activities and was really all that was needed.  Now that we have the use of the extra toys, they get strewn about, but not really played with as much. 

Celebration Giving

Gift-giving times like Christmas and birthdays are hard because I really want the kids to get to open gifts they are delighted with, but I dread having the extra stuff.  Foreign-language books (and movies) are always worth it, so that they could keep up with their language skills, we felt they were worth stocking up on (and probably took up most of the luggage space on this last move). I always try to think in terms of consumable gifts, like arts and crafts supplies, or things that are so inexpensive we don't mind leaving them behind. If the grandparents are visiting for Christmas or something, I also give them strict instructions about what they're allowed to bring as gifts, and I always try to send them back with as much stuff as they bring-- for example, clothes that can be handed down to another kid or books we can save for later. 

Pretend to Move Once a Year

I guess this doesn't really help someone in a situation of living somewhere permanently and wanting to control clutter-- they wouldn't be forced to give it up at the end of the year.  Based on my experiences, my advice would have to be, "Once a year, get as many of your possessions as you can into one suitcase and one carry-on per person, and get rid of the rest!" but that's pretty impractical, and I'm sure I wouldn't do it if I weren't forced to.  But I think I have probably become a lot more thoughtful about things I acquire, thinking ahead to what are we going to be doing with this thing a year from now -- do I really need it?  

A Helpful Chant

When doing big clean-ups, I have to chant, "when it doubt, throw it out!" I think I tend to want to be a pack rat and save things, so it can be liberating to know you have to throw things out. My husband really wants to save every bit of artwork the kids produce - so much for the "consumable" art supply gifts! But really, all the pieces worth saving can fit into a large envelope. We just don't buy a lot of stuff (it's not really in our budget to, anyway), and I instruct Grandma not to, though it's hard for her! 

Buy Second-Hand and Then Donate Again

When we lived with no car, we could walk anywhere we needed to go most of the time because [it]was such a small town, but something like a Wal-mart was a drive away.  So if I needed something that would usually call for that kind of store, I'd first check out the local Salvation Army Thrift Store, which had a decent selection and the things there were pretty nice (I checked out the one near where we presently live, and things were not so nice!)-- for instance, I picked up an iron and ironing board for probably under $10 total, so it wasn't difficult to donate it back to the thrift store when we had to move.

When Grandmothers Get in the Way

Anyway, I had the younger kids with me all the time, and the thrift store also had toys, and my daughter would always pick out some stuffed animal that she badly wanted-- a large unicorn for instance, and even though it was only $1.99 or whatever.  I'd say "no, we don't need that" realizing that it would become a precious friend that couldn't be left behind but wouldn't fit in a suitcase, and I'd feel pretty relieved that I had a good excuse not to have to bring the thing home. But on two different occasions, kindly grandmotherly types overheard, felt sorry for her, and came up and gave my daughter the money so that the poor girl could buy herself the huge unicorn or horse or whatever. Noooooo!

How to Get Your Kids to Part with Toys

We solved the problem at moving time by having a little girl friend of hers adopt them and promise to take good care of them, so it all worked out-- she got to have a couple of months of playing with them, and it wasn't so traumatic to part with them.

---

So, to those of you with offspring in their younger years, what do you say? Is it possible to live as a minimalist? Let us know in the comments, and PLEASE share any tips that have been helpful to you in this area (even if you aren't perfect or even close ;).

For more on this topic, join the free 10-Day Decluttering Challenge and associated minimalism email series.

photo credit: AngryJulieMonday via photopin cc photo credit: pricecs via photopin cc

Top 10 Best Websites for True Creativity

I typed "what is creativity?" into the Google, and this is what it said:

The use of the imagination or original ideas, esp. in the production of an artistic work.

To some extent, we each have our own definitions of creativity. Those of us in creative professions may have our own unique set of rules, superstitions, ceremonies, and special pants to protect and nourish our creativity.

Getting it Out There

So what do I mean by "true creativity?"  Well, I mean what I think is important to be truly creative. For me, true creativity emphasizes the production part of the definition. And I would go even further to say not just the production part, but the getting-it-out-there part. Because if you are all alone in your house being creative without sharing it, you are the only one who is going to benefit. And you are WAY too big-hearted, brave, and selfless to let that happen.

Criteria

The criteria, therefore, to make my list of top 10 websites for TRUE creativity included not just inspiration (although a couple are pure inspiration) but also encouragement, education, and channels for distributing the things you create. Because, again, creation without an audience -- creation without benefitting others --  is like having a child and then never letting it grow up and experience the world.

Some websites masquerade as pro-creativity sites when really, they are just pro-crastinativity sites. (And yes, I made that word up for phrasal symmetry.) Intentions might be pure, but these sites waste your time, make you feel bad about your own creative production, and then, in the worst cases,  use your weakened emotional state to sell you things you don't need. Yuck. I've filtered all those out for you. You’re welcome.

The Top Ten

Here are the topic 10 best websites for true creativity (other than this one, of course) along with their highlights and an idea-suggestion for how to use each to get you going on your creative way.

1. Design Milk

Highlight: This online magazine covers what's new and modern all over the design world: art, architecture, fashion, interior design, and technology.

Idea:  The best sources of ideas are almost never in your field (you risk copying someone else there). So if you're a fashion designer, try looking at their architecture section. You might just find yourself inspired by the lines and colors you see there.

2.  COLOURLovers

Highlight: This community of color fans shares palettes and patterns inspired by a wide variety of sources, including magazines, weddings, and Japanese art. Since I'm obsessed with color myself, I can't help but sneak in a link to this amazing article on Creative Bloq that shares 27 other online color tools. I could spend all day just looking at colors and palettes.

Idea: The colors and palettes are each given creative names by community members.  Maybe you're writing song lyrics and you need some inspiration for how you're going to sing about the color of your lover's eyes or the sky. How about "lime fusion," or "moonage daydream"?

3. Kindle Direct Publishing

Highlight: There are a lot of websites out there aimed at helping self-publishing writers promote and sell their work. But Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing is the only program I've experienced significant results from. The program is free, easy to use, and in most cases, authors can earn 70% royalties while tapping into the marketing powerhouse that is the Amazon website. Through their  KDP select program, I've been able to reach over ten times the amount of people I would normally be able to promote to. That means my book is actually out there in the world, even though I haven't spent a lot of time touring or promoting through blogs.

Idea: See just how easy it is to use by publishing one chapter of your book via KDP. Once you convince yourself just how easy it is to reach an audience, you'll be more motivated to finish your novel and start selling it.

4. Pinterest

Highlight: Pinterest may be the world's best collection of visually-presented ideas. If you are a visual or curatorial person, odds are you are already on Pinterest. If you're not, get ready to sacrifice at least the next three days and nights to this addiction.

Idea:  Maybe you're a film set designer. You could click on the "home decor" tab to instantly see incredible designs and atmosphere. And any other idea you could dream of.

5. ARTtwo50

Highlight: This brand new app allows people to virtually hang your visual art on the walls before buying it. And it markets and promotes the work of artists who sign up. I know so many artists would take a bullet before letting the words “business plan” come out of their mouth. Until ARTtwo50, that meant starvation or tending bar.

Idea: Use the app as your imagination puts you in the shoes of the people who buy your art (or who you visualize buying your art). See what they want and what they need. See how it’s going to hang above their couch. Hopefully that inspires you to make something that will make their life better.

6.  Times Haiku

Highlight: Jacob Harris at the New York Times created an algorithm that automatically detects haiku which occur within the paper's articles. This Tumblr blog features the human-selected best from those naturally occurring haiku the computer program finds.

Idea: Revisit Times Haiku when you need a writing or creativity prompt. Could this haiku:

inspire a short story, or even a novel? What about a painting?

7. Etsy

Highlight: This online market place is the first spot to check out if you want to buy or sell handmade or vintage items.

Idea:  Use the Collections feature to get atmospheric inspiration for anything from a poem to plating your latest culinary creation. Or just use it to get your own creations out there!

8. Freundevonfreunden

Highlight: FvF is an online magazine that shows creative people all over the world in their working environments, studios, and homes.

Idea: There's something inspiring about seeing artists in the space where they make things. Next time you feel self-doubt, just take a peek at FvF to be reminded that people all over the world are creating and you can too.

9. TED

Highlight: TED is a nonprofit that started with the goal of spreading ideas in the areas of technology, entertainment and design. Now it's become synonymous with videos of compelling and inspiring talks on just about any idea worth spreading.

Idea: I suggest watching TED talks when you need encouragement, motivation, or inspiration, because they tend to fire you up enough to get you back on track with YOUR projects. It's not an endless rabbit hole, with one video leading to another until you suddenly realize it's 2 AM. I usually can just watch one or two and then am able to apply an idea to my art or life.

10. Austin Kleon's Blog

Highlight: Writer-Artist Austin Kleon combines writing and visual appeal in his pieces, giving him unique authority to talk and write about the trans-mezcla nature of creativity.

Idea: If you haven't read his book, Steal Like an Artist, you should. In the meantime, check out his blog where he provides pithy and encouraging advice on the creative process.

BONUS!

11. Any Website That Makes You Laugh

Highlight: This website tickles your funny bone; it always seems to have a video or joke that cracks you up every time.

Idea: Visit when you feel creatively stuck. Laughter decreases stress, increases blood flow, increases positive brain chemicals, and can help improve creativity.

Did I miss a website that is in your top ten? Tell me which one and why in the comments.

Image credits:

1.  See-ming Lee 李思明 SML via photopin cc (image altered).

2. betta design via photopin cc (image altered).

Dry Wanderings

We spend the last two weekends in February exploring nearby places that are just too hot and dry to enjoy during the arid summers here. The first weekend, we went down to...

The Negev Desert

Vision: Emotionally fulfilling stargazing and life-changing desert sunrises.

Reality: Overcast skies, dull clouds, freezing winds, and light drizzle.

Before we left, when we confirmed that the forecast was going to dash our star-gazing dreams, Prince Charming asked me if I thought we should still go.

"Yeah," I said. "We'll go and have fun despite the weather."

And we did. It was cold and the skies were lugubrious, but there was something charming about the town of Mitzpe Ramon, Israel. It's a small outpost that has attracted a combination of hikers, outdoor enthusiasts, and  eccentric artist types. And you know how much I love eccentric artists types. Charming and I always feel comfortable in places inhabited by eccentric artist types.  And I also love outdoor enthusiasts. So I felt right at home.

I took this picture in Mitzpe Ramon. It's a bicycle (outdoorsy type thing) that has been covered with white fuzz and turned into a permanent art display (eccentric artist thing to do).

Here's the rest of that art installation:

I think it's impressive that Mitzpe Ramon has attracted anyone at all, considering that its claim to fame is a hole. A very large hole in the ground. We couldn't find the hole at first, so we drove around, asking each other do you think the hole is over there? Could it be over there by those nice apartment buildings? Maybe if we follow the sign that says "visitor center."

Then, after a frigid walk/jog up an incline, we came upon the hole.

According to TouristIsrael.com, this hole is the world's largest erosion makhtesh. Makhtesh is often translated as "crater," but that is misleading since this hole wasn't caused by an explosion or the impact of a celestial body.

A better translation of makhtesh, perhaps, would be "erosion circle," or, "big ol hole."  Geological forces created this  superlative wonder some 220 million years ago.

It was pretty chilly on top of that hole in February.

Here's a photo (from the Shalom Israel Tours website) of the hole on a better day.

We stayed at a desert-hostel-camp rather chillingly called "Silent Arrow."  The place was so hipster that it had an ironic jacuzzi.

It also had a friendly owner and volunteers, and a great vibe. We stayed in one of these tents:

wadi qelt

The next weekend, we decided to do some hiking in one of the longest and most famous valleys (wadis) in Palestine: Wadi Qelt. To hike the whole thing from Jerusalem to Jericho takes about 10-12 hours, depending on the weather, your speed and your fitness level. We wanted the gentle stroll version, so we just drove around until we found an entrance (we knew because there was a tour bus, a camel, and some bedouins) and started walking around. We started at the top of the wadi. By the way, my vision is that I can always get my dog to look at the camera. Reality:

After photos, we drove down into the wadi. That is, Charming and I rode in the car, and we made Jelly run behind us. She needed the exercise.

Once almost to the bottom of the wadi, we got out and hiked around. At the very bottom of the valley, we heard the delightful sound of bubbling water, and followed it to this narrow aqueduct:

We found a green spot amidst the brown for a nice picnic lunch.

One of the most famous spots in the Wadi Qelt is St. George's Monastery. But by the time we got back to the car and drove to the monastery, we were tired.  We quickly became discouraged about the amount of energy it would take to run the gauntlet of hyper aggressive bedouin jewelry sales representatives at the entrance to that section of the park. So we went home. We'll have to save St. George's for another day, or just enjoy photos of it online.

Most of the time when traveling, things don't turn out the way you think they will. Although neither of these trips turned out perfectly, they had unexpected joys.

What about you? Do you have a traveling story where things didn't turn out quite like you expected? I'd love to hear it in the comments.

My Love Note to Juthour

I was recently hiking at Juthour, an arboretum eco park on the outskirts of Ramallah, Palestine. It was just before sunset, and this February day was especially stunning.  The air was clear and warm, but the earliness of the season meant there were no annoying bugs out yet. We could see clearly for an especially long distance all the way to Tel Aviv. As I walked up the hill with a couple friends, chasing the sun before it sank down into that western hillside, I thought of how grateful I am for Juthour's existence. My gratitude quickly turned into a desire to help Juthour grow, since I know that the land Juthour protects is under constant threat of development, bulldozing by Israeli extremists, poisoning by shepherds who fear the wild boar, and toxic construction waste dumping. Whew, that is a laundry list of threats to this beautiful land:

When I told Morgan, one of the co-founders of Juthour, about my urge to help preserve this piece of land, she suggested I write a blog post about it. So here is my little love letter list to Juthour.

My gratitude is especially deep when I think about these nine special attributes of Juthour:

1. It's on one of the last undeveloped hillsides near Ramallah, so I don't see or hear construction noise as I enjoy nature.

2. It's proximity to where I live in Ramallah means that I don't have to make a day trip of it, and plan a hike only for special occasions. I can zip out there any time for a quick hike.

3. I can go with friends or alone, and feel safe because the friendly park rangers are frequently in the arboretum, and they expect to see me.

4. I can run on the dirt road around Juthour with my dog, without fear that people will stop and try to steal my dog because no one drives on this quiet dirt road.

5. Not only is there already an incredible variety of trees, flowers and birds at Juthour, but the park rangers are always adding more botanical treasures to this eco-park.

6. The park founders take action by reporting nearby illegal construction dumping, so I know that there won't be huge piles of trash around my hike, like there are in other hiking spots around Ramallah.

7. Juthour (which means "roots" in Arabic) is being preserved so that people can learn about and enjoy Palestine's natural beauty, so I feel welcome there as a hiker.

8. The park founders are dedicated to peaceful, non-violent resistance of the Israeli occupation of Palestine, so I'm supporting a good cause by supporting Juthour.

9. I can be inspired by the founders, who are resilient in the face of setbacks. I know when and if the Israeli government or extremist settlers destroy the trees in the park, the founders won't give up on saving the land, but will start planting the park all over again, always in a sustainable way.

I hope this natural treasure continues to grow and thrives so that Palestinians, expats, and tourists alike can enjoy the incredible sights and sounds of this special place. Are you a hiker and nature lover?  Like the Juthour Facebook page to show your support for the eco park.

Top image credit: Juthour Arboretum. The others are from my Instagram feed, which you are welcome to follow.

The Real Power of a Power Suit

My aunt, Kelly Parker Palace, wrote today's guest post. I write in my minimalism books about how the true power of a belonging lies in the memories and stories you attach to it, not the actual possession itself. I think this dramatic story illustrates that point perfectly. Once you realize that the memories are the treasure, you can let go of the old and let the new in. Enjoy. -- Genevieve

I often fantasize about how nice it would be to have an uncluttered organized closet. My clothes lined up by color or purpose, everything in its place.  The huge dose of inspiration I needed for this came to me from reading my niece’s book, Minimalist Living. I felt I was ready, normally I am a purger-not a collector. Most of our home qualifies as minimalist. My closet was the last untouched area. I thought I was ready to conquer it, but when I went to take action, I froze like a statue standing in the doorway.  Lucky for me I had access to Genevieve a world traveling, minimalist expert-author, who I knew could assist me. I whipped off the following email to her, asking for help.

Hi Sweetie,

I am reading your book on minimalism (and loving it) and it is inspiring me to de-clutter my clothing/closet. But I am having trouble getting rid of my "winter" wardrobe. Having moved here from NY and DC, I have a great collection of wonderful winter-wear: coats, expensive business suits, and all the accessories that go with these items.

Though we have now lived in hot Florida for 9 years, I still have all my winter coats, suits and clothes hanging in my closet. I keep thinking that "one day" I may move north again and would need them. Also, of course, I do travel to cold climates, so I may need a few cold weather items.

I know part of getting rid of the suits is saying goodbye to my fun and successful career with Pfizer. It makes me sad. Also some sadness is involved in the winter coat goodbyes. Any advice you can give me in letting these go?

I love you!

Aunt Kelly

Though Genevieve is time zones away on the other side of the world, she picked up the phone and called me when she read my email.  After a quick check-in, she cut to my plea for help.  Who knew what followed would be like one of the best, most cathartic “counseling” sessions of my life? That I would be shedding tears of deep emotion related to clothing in my closet?!

The Session

In our phone conversation Genevieve asked me to think about the feelings I got when I evaluated various pieces of my clothing. She recommended that I take a picture of items with which I carry powerful memories.  Maybe write a story about the most important ones. She reminded me that by taking old things out of my closet/life I would make room for new/exciting things. She asked me important questions in my search for the reasons why I had held onto items for decades, without using them, even once. I answered. She listened. I cried. I thought about things more deeply than I had in a long time. After the call and this writing exercise, I felt ten times lighter! And I’m ready to really take action towards my fantasy closet. What follows is just one story of a “Power Suit” that was holding power over me, hanging in my closet untouched for the last 14 years. I hope by photographing this suit and writing its story I will be able to get rid of it and invite something new into my life that serves me better.

The Story

The day was September 11, 2001 and I felt extra good as I walked to work in my freshly dry cleaned, chartreuse, Liz Claiborne suit, pearls, tan pumps and hose.

It was also a “good hair” day, I noted with pleasure. I was living and working in New York City.  Like many people in NYC that day, I had a spring in my step on what started as an exceptionally beautiful, crisp, clear morning.  Additionally, I was happily anticipating September 12th, my 40th birthday, and was looking forward to celebrating the big 4-0 with friends during the upcoming weekend.

The route I covered daily from my apartment to my office took me by a charming old firehouse with an open truck bay and handsome, friendly firefighters that waved and smiled at me every morning while sitting at a round table and drinking coffee, as they started their shift. Seeing these men in uniform was of the highlights of my morning walk/commute. My office was located on 42nd Street on the 36th floor of one of Pfizer Pharmaceuticals buildings, our global headquarters in the heart of Midtown Manhattan.

Loving Life

I had a job I loved at Pfizer, great co-workers and thrived on the energy of the amazing city and all it had to offer. Life was good.  In fact, in my “Power Suit” on the streets of NYC, I felt deep gratitude to be living one version of my dream life.  I was smiling at people on the way to work, not always a common practice in NYC, but I did it anyway on this gorgeous day.  Little did I know, in just a couple of hours I would be carrying my pumps and wearing holes in the bottom of my stockings as I ran down 36 flights of stairs in a terror filled exit from my office. That would be the beginning of a 16-hour saga of escaping the war zone New York City became that day.

I often feel guilty about mentioning any of my own sadness, grief, anxiety, confusion or pain which I experienced on 9/11. It feels as though it should be insignificant compared to the many that had worked at the twin towers or lost their life or a loved one. Yet, my experiences, memories and emotions of that day run so deep that to this day if I see the images of the planes hitting the towers, I am rocked with immediate tears and flashes of feelings that still haunt me.

The First

As I sat at my desk around 8:45 am on 9/11, a co-worker popped their head into my office and said, “Hey, come to the back window. A plane just hit one of the twin towers and you can see it perfectly.” Initially my mind conjured up a two-person “piper cub” plane just scratching the facade of the mighty tower.  When I turned the corner of the hall to our big picture window facing south and looked at the towers, I was not prepared for what I saw.  The clear day with low humidity provided a direct, flawless view of the towers from our 36th floor sight-line. There were no buildings tall enough to interfere with our view. What we saw made the TV images look meek. The plumes of red, orange and yellow flames and thick black smoke pouring from a gaping hole in the tower was huge and horrific against the brilliant blue sky. This was no piper cub.  A giant aircraft had hit the tower and the tragedy and loss of life was obvious. BAM! Oh my god! Just as we watched the first tower burning, it was surreal to see a second plane slam into the other tower directly in our view. Not on TV, but live before my very eyes. This could not be real. Was I having a nightmare? Were we at war?

The Second

Fear and confusion struck many of us when the second plane hit . A wave of nausea came over me. One of my male co-workers, whom I particularly admired for his strong leadership, vomited in the nearest trash can. I felt like doing that too, but didn’t have enough breakfast in me to produce it. At this point time was both fast and slow.  Several of us stood in silence watching ghastly clouds of blackness and flames rise into the sky.  What we thought was debris falling from the towers, we later realized were people jumping from their offices.  We were shaken out of our disbelief when emergency sirens to evacuate our building began to boom loudly through the halls.  Panic mode was now in full swing for all of us. We were instructed to quickly grab our personal items and “walk” down 36th flights of stairs.  I ran. So did many others.

A War Zone

Though I never saw the media cover it from this angle, several of us in the tall buildings of NYC had our thoughts race to Pearl Harbor. We felt like we were in a war zone.  Would there be more planes flying into tall buildings in the city? I wasn’t going to stick around to find out. I needed to get to the place where I felt the most protected, safe and loved on earth--my parents home in Richmond, Virginia. I needed to sit on Mom and Dad’s couch and sip tea and have them tell me things would be OK. Even though I was 39 years old, I felt like a small child, lost in the grocery store, panicked. But I was lost in NYC which was now a very scary place and I wanted out.

Running

The rest of that day is a blur. I ran all the way back to my apartment in bare feet. Sirens were blaring everywhere and the streets were filled with a parade of fire trucks. The sidewalks were crowded as people rushed to safety. At my apartment I tossed off my power suit and got into comfy traveling clothes and running shoes. My plan was to catch a train to Richmond. I packed a backpack of stuff and went to find my roommate Barb to say goodbye. She was on the roof of our apartment watching the sliver-view of the towers, with other residents.  I found her shiny blonde hair among the crowd and told her my plan. That is when we heard a massive sound and felt the ground tremble.  One of the towers was falling to the ground. My heart rate had almost returned to normal from the morning and my plan to get out of the city had calmed me a bit, but the tremor beneath me now was like another blow.  As the first tower was falling to the ground,  we watched what felt like slow motion. The storm cloud of dust was rising in the sky and I thought it would engulf us, even though we were a safe distance away.  We all knew the death toll was rising as we watched. Panic struck me again. I began to run once more. Yes, real sub-8-minute per mile running. I was scared and wanted out.

Escape

I headed south to Penn Station to catch a train. I passed people covered in white dust heading north. People crying everywhere. Strong, handsome men in $3,000 power suits crying on their cell phones.  Strangers hugging one another. Emergency vehicles were abundant. The streets were crowded.  Taxis weren’t stopping. The amazing, powerful positive energy of the city was different.  People were scared. When I arrived at Penn Station, I was met by a gruff policeman and barricades.  The officer informed me that Penn Station was closed. No trains were running. In fact, he told me that “the island” (Manhattan) was being closed down. No entry nor exit. This made me crazy! “What?!” I screamed at him, “I have to get off the island!” Then he mumbled that one of the north bridges might be open.  I felt trapped. Rumors were flying about the corpses piling up and how the city might become a health hazard. Now I was heading north hoping to find an open bridge. Again, I began to run, my anxiety still high, for the next few miles until I took a rest in Central Park. My heart rate was high, even though I was a competitive runner. Running with heavy back pack while scared can do that. I needed a rest.

Shared Grief

In Central Park I found a bench with only one person on it and plenty of room for me to stop and drink one of the water bottles I had packed.  I sat down and got control of my breathing. That is when I noticed, in detail, the well dressed young man sitting next to me, his shoulders heaving with each crying sob he made.  At first I noticed just the movement of his body, then I heard his waling. Maybe me sitting there with him allowed him to release his emotions. Or maybe the reality of the day had just hit him, but he was in pain. I put my hand on top of one of his and I gently asked, “Are you OK?”  “No, no,” he quietly gurgled through tears. “My best friend was in tower two on the 101st floor. He was above the crash. I know he’s dead”, he continued.  “I’m so sorry”, I said and began to cry with him. As each hour passed my emotions were getting more raw. It felt good to let out some of the pressure. My shock and anxiety was now grief for this young man and his friend.  I couldn’t think about the other massive loss of life that day, or I never would have stopped crying. I felt stuck to the bench, drained of energy now. But again, as if on cue, I was jolted out of an emotional nightmare by a loud rumbling in the sky.

The rumbling rocked us. Hard to identify at first, but then clearly, it was the sound of a fleet of fighter jets zooming over Central Park and NYC.  Everyone in the Park looked up, visibly shaken by another assault on our already damaged senses.  Fear and adrenaline filled me and my fellow bench dweller. We speculated. Were we being attacked? Were those US jets or enemies’? Now my negative imagination was in over-drive. I needed to run again.  After a quick farewell to my sad friend, I was off.  I walked-ran many miles over the Triborough Bridge until I strained a hamstring. Finally I reached LaGuardia Airport by foot, where all planes were grounded.

The Last Car

At the Budget Rental Car desk I got their last vehicle to drive to Richmond.  The trip should have taken 8 hours in normal circumstances but with the required detour around the city and the traffic it took 13 hours. Going south on I-95 I passed hundreds of fire trucks heading north to assist NYC in her hour of need. The fire trucks all had their lights flashing which helped keep me alert as I made the long drive. The processional of endless flashing fire trucks is a unique visual which I will always remember.  I arrived at my parents at 2am. Mom and Dad were waiting up for me. I had forgotten to eat all day.  Mom wrapped me in a blanket on the couch, brought me a bowl of cereal and both parents said, “Happy Birthday Honey, we’re so glad you are home safely.”

A New World

As I crawled into bed at my parents’ in the wee hours of the morning, I thought of my NYC apartment and what it would be like to be going back there. At that point, I didn’t know when I would be returning to NYC. I would learn many things had changed in this great city. My friendly morning firefighting crew lost some members from their shift in the towers. One thing I knew I would find upon my return was my chartreuse, Liz Claiborne power suit crumpled on the floor of my room where I had thrown it in my hasty escape on 9/11.

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1st photo credit: ifindkarma via photopin cc

2nd photo credit: Kelly Parker Palace

Welcome Fairy Tale Life Blog Community!

I've got some news.

I'm bringing my creativity coaching and blogging from my website FairyTaleLifeCoaching.com to Packing Lust. I'm combining both blogs so that I can keep all my work here, under one website. That means the Fairy Tale Life community is joining us here at Packing Lust.

Welcome!

To the talented artists and creatives who read the Fairy Tale Life blog, I'm so glad to have you here. I've moved most of the content from Fairy Tale Life over here to Packing Lust. (Click the "creativity" link in the menu above to see those posts.)

Sadly, the one thing I can't move is your wonderful comments. So, I'd like to take this chance to thank each of you by name who took the time to comment on a post at Fairy Tale Life Coaching. I hope you find continued inspiration + magic here at Packing Lust.

Thank you to:

SarahJH, Artist

Ursula, the Crafting Gypsy + Magic Button Maker

Natalie, Writer at All I Am Deciding

Vivian Mandala, Designer

Calli, Photographer

Maria, Writer, Queen of the Prairies, + Brainstormer

The Trog, Writer + Spoken Word Performer

Dan Kenny, Coach

Thanks so much.

I'm grateful for your support of Fairy Tale Life Coaching, and thankful for your support of Packing Lust (most of you are here already). To ALL who read Fairy Tale Life,  I hope Packing Lust can be a place of fun, inspiration, and magic for you.

Warmly + Sparklingly,

10 Things to Know About Italy

I was a little worried about feeling lonely over the holidays, especially because we were planning to go to Italy, just the two of us. I wasn't that worried, because I knew it would be lovely to spend time alone with Prince Charming in one of the most romantic places in the world. I mean, Italy for Christmas? Yes, please. On the other hand, Italy for Christmas? Would all the Italian families be feasting with their massive extended families (and thus not around to open the museums or run the restaurants)? Would two feel like too small a group? Well, yes, and no, respectively. Here's why Italy for the holidays is still a good idea, despite most of the Italians being on holiday themselves, along with 9 other things you might want to know about spending your Christmas and New Year in Italy.

Rome-Antics

1. The streets are still filled with people.

Indeed, most of the Italians were no where to be found. However, we found that the streets were still filled with people, providing a joyful camaraderie.

On Christmas day, we took a six-hour walk around Rome, keeping in mind that very few actual museums or sights would be open. Our goal was to hit the major photo opportunities that were (or could be) outdoors, like the Pantheon, the Spanish Steps, and Trevi Fountain. It was fun to be with the crowds of people, and romantic to not have any obligations on Christmas day other than to enjoy our time together.

Piazza di Trevi was alive with people. Pulsing with camera flashes. Everywhere we looked, we saw someone waving us out of the way so that they could take a photo of someone behind us.  Overwhelmed, we got out of the virtual mosh pit that was the steps and space in front of the fountain. After catching our  breath and a regroup, we dove back in, trading photos with another couple. Then we got out. There were tourists from all over the world. In this photo, you can see the range of headgear from Santa hat to beanie to hijab, reflecting the amazing diversity of the crowd.

 2. Foodies beware.

Maybe it's merely a testament to how much Prince Charming spoils me with his culinary skills, but I wasn't as impressed with the food in Italy as I was on previous trips. I am extremely spoiled when it comes to food. I also have very specific standards when it comes to restaurant service, standards born out of growing up with Southern hospitality, living in casual and friendly California,  and being friends with a chef-caterer who would pray and send good vibes into the food as she was preparing it. So basically, food is everything: a feeling of welcome, an invitation to friendship, and a spiritual experience.

Food Should Not Equal Stress

Sadly, over the holidays in Italy, even choosing a restaurant felt anxiety-inducing. Once we did, we encountered stressed-out hosts, unimaginative fare, and servers who on more than one occasion, simply forgot to bring us what we ordered.  And this happened despite researching restaurants, looking up reviews, and asking for recommendations. Arguably, our best food experiences were when we assembled our own picnic meals from piazza markets or from places like this butcher shop. And then there was the stellar gelato recommendation from our tour guide, Max. He said that we'd be tempted to settle for lesser gelato because shops popped up all around Giolitti to skim off tourists who wouldn't wait in line. But we waited and were rewarded. And of course, the coffee was astrologically good. 3. AirBnB rocks. If you haven't gone for it yet, go for it! Pay to stay in a stranger's house. This is not just for the money you can save, but for the richness of the experience. When you stay on someone's home, you get to experience how a local lives, day to day. And when else can you get away with snooping around in someone's bathroom cabinet? Hotels can be fun, but eventually they all start to feel the same.  With AirBnb, we could afford to stay in a prime location in Trastevere, just a stroll away from everywhere noteworthy in Rome, and a few blocks from the Tiber River.

And our rooftop view was practically cinematic.

Finally, the clock on the wall helped us relax -- and showed that the owner of our apartment had a Mediterranean sense of time.

 4. Go ahead and dork out.

I'm not sure how to segway (groan) into this one, so I'll just say it: Go for it! Last time I was exploring a big city, and my feet hurt, I saw these people dorkily zooming by on Segways. I looked at them with skepticism laced with envy. And internally mocked them.  But a Segway tour is as fun as your inner child thinks it will be.  Or more fun. A Segway tour of Ancient Rome was part of Prince Charming's birthday present, but we enjoyed it equally. It's a bit pricey at 75 Euros a person, but WORTH EVERY CENT!

 Florence

5.  Florence has the world's best window shopping.

That is, if you like colorfully bizarre and offbeat displays, which I do.  You go to Italy hungry for aesthetic marvels (and pasta) and you quickly get tired of beautiful ancient architecture. So in Florence, you hope to be surprised by new art, even after all this time. After all, Florence was the birthplace of the Renaissance.  Maybe it's still happening, you hopefully think. Or at least I did, and wasn't disappointed when on our first evening stroll, we were beckoned into a art gallery that had some surprising works by a modern artist on display. It felt like a magical moment to duck into a gallery where we were the only two people enjoying the art, while outside the windows the Arno river sparkled in the night.

But then just down the road we found out where all the out-of-work artists are employed. Some of the storefront displays were wildly creative, including a Christmas tree made from toilet-paper wrapped Barbie dolls, a flamingo wearing a necktie, and this beautiful red ballgown, that upon closer inspection, is actually bedding.

6. Museums are stressful.

I have no idea how Prince Charming got this picture that makes me look alone with the Birth of Venus. The reason I'm looking so thrilled in it is because a) I'm afraid we are about to get caught using a camera (even sans flash) and b) I'm being jostled on every side by invisible hordes of exhausted and grumpy tourists.

I'm not sure if the crowds have gotten worse since I was last in Italy or the holiday numbers combined with the limited opening hours clusterf*cked things up.  At Florence's Uffizi Galleries, we stumbled along with the waves of sweaty masses that trudged through each gallery. Museum workers had lost that "I'm-working-with-the-world's-greatest-art" sparkle in their eyes days ago. Perhaps years ago. Yuck.

Breaking the "Rules"

Oh, and also, I'd like to tell you that Prince Charming and I are officially "the reason Americans are hated" all over the world, as stated by another American tourist who seemed to pop up nearby us throughout our visit to the museum. We may have deserved her ire. You see, we know something that the other polite American, British, and Asian tourists in the line didn't know: Italians don't queue. There's no sanctity of place in line. Rather, it is respected to push yourself through the crowd where you need to go. Spain was like this to, and Israel and Palestine are similar. I'll never forget attending Mass in Spain and at the end, suddenly it's a holy mob shuffle to get up to Communion.  It must be a Mediterranean thing.

No-No

So anyway, we knew that the Italians running the museum were probably laughing at the tourists standing in line. And they had sold us an appointment ticket to get in at 4:30. It was 4:30. The museum closed at 6.  Other people in line had been standing there for an hour after their appointment to get in. We could go to the back, and get into the museum 15 minutes before closing, while watching the savvier travelers cut in line while our stress levels soarded, or we could cut. So yes, we cut in line. And we did it right in front of the official. He didn't care. In fact, he allowed us in, right after the Italian guy that cut in front of us.  Still, despite doing something culturally approved in Italy, I felt bad for doing what I knew was a no-no in my own culture.

7. You may not want to get medical care here.

File this one under the sadly hilarious. Or hilariously sad. I'm not sure which one. Not only is this Italian health care worker smoking, but he's smoking in his ambulance. This was the first thing I saw as I emerged from Florence's central train station, and it tickled me. Do you think that he'll keep smoking as he speeds through the streets on the way to an emergency? Or will he throw the cigarette out his window? Or will he take the time to get out, stub it out, and throw it away safely, all while precious seconds on the clock tick away? Do you think the cigarette smoke will bother the patient in the back, possibly struggling to breathe what could be his or her last breath? Like the line thing, what he's doing is a cultural no-no in the U.S., and probably totally fine in Italy.

8. Pisa is a fun day trip.

Just a pleasant hour and change train ride from Florence,

Pisa was a decision we left until the last minute. We almost didn't go, because there is so much to see in Florence. And we knew that Pisa was simply a glorified photo op. Yet, we couldn't resist taking photos with the world famous icon, La Torre Pendente. The Leaning Tower of Pisa has become a symbol of travel, right up there with the airplane and the globe. It may surpass the Eiffel tour in its fame. It was exciting to be there, to see that it really does lean, and to take all the silly pictures that we swore we wouldn't take. Plus the weather was  beautiful. After our photo shoot, we enjoyed sitting down for pizza. Less for the pizza and more for the location. After the host sat us, I looked up and saw that the Torre Pendente was in full view. "Really?" I said. "Really" the waiter replied, without missing a beat. Really.

Venice

9. How to escape the snobbery of Venice.

If familiarity breeds contempt, I understand why Venetians seem to hate tourists.  Venice is overrun, but that doesn't lessen the beauty and romance of Venice. I recommend a gondola ride on the Grande Canal. New Year's Eve in Venice was crowded, Bellini-guzzling fun. Followed by fireworks.

To escape the snobbery of the areas around the Grande Canal and San Marco Square, I recommend a trip out to Lido Beach, another island of Venice that we accessed by water taxi.

Ibernisti Club

There's a small club of crazies called the Ibernisti (it means hibernators) who bond over a daily dip in the frigid waters of the Adriatic Sea every winter day. On New Years, the tradition attracts bigger crowds, with families coming out to see the crazy swimmers start off a New Year in style. You know, with pain. A lot of pain. Followed by a lot of adrenaline.

Can I Join?

I had been telling everyone that I was going to do this - swim with the Ibernisti on New Year's in Venice. So I had to. And I wanted to. Because I had to. And I wanted to. Sort of. It was cold! Just moments before noon, when the first dip of 2014 was scheduled to take place, I couldn't see anyone in their swimwear. I had to join the group! Where was everyone getting ready? Finally, I saw a man in a red swimsuit duck out of a tent. I ran up to him, gesticulating wildly that I would like to swim with the Ibernisti. He smiled broadly, clapped an arm around my shoulder, and ushered me into the tent, where about a dozen men appeared to be hurriedly changing clothes. "Non guardere!" my guide said brightly to the other men. Don't watch her dress. Fortunately, I had my swimwear on under my clothes, so there was no need for nudity. And don't worry, the only Italian sausage I saw that day was the one they served us with lentils after our swim. We charged out into the water, decorated with red and white balloons. There appeared to be subgroups of the Ibernisti club, for example, one group of women all wore necklaces made of white ribbon. I quickly made friends, as one does when wondering exactly how far into the water qualifies as "swimming," when it's so cold. The answer? Up to your neck, but not past your ears because the frigid water can hurt your ears badly if you don't have a swim cap to cover them. After a respectable amount of time in the water, we emerged, took a hurried group photo, and ran through the now-warm air to dress. Afterwards, a band played Beach Music. Songs like "Sitting on the dock of the Bay," seemed out of place for Venice, but oddly fitting, and added to the warm, small-town cameraderie at Lido Beach. I made balloon animals for the kids, which was really the first time I'd been able to successfully do that in Italy. Italians and tourists become suspicious when you try to give them anything, because the M.O. of the gypsies and street salespeople is to "give" you something and then demand payment or donation in return. By the time I had gotten comfortable making balloon animals for the kids around me, we felt pleasantly far from the snobbery of Venice, and far from the tourist scenes throughout the big cities in Italy.

Milan

10. Milan is good for a Last Supper.

I'd been to Milan before, and it was raining. Guess what? It was raining this time too. We knew industrial, urban, rainy Milan wouldn't be our favorite city, and only planned to spend one day there. We wanted to see da Vinci's The Last Supper. You have to buy tickets in advance to see the famous quasi-fresco.  It's one of those things where the museum sells tickets for an affordable price, and as soon as they go on sale, tourist agencies buy them all up and resell them at triple the price. When we arrived for our appointment, the museum was telling disappointed visitors that the tickets were sold out for several months.  Yet we were able to buy them just a few days before our visit from an agency. If you want to pay the cheaper price, make sure you buy the tickets several months or more in advance. The Last Supper was more faded and in worse shape than I thought it would be, but still worth seeing. I appreciated that they let small groups in so that the space wasn't crowded. They also provided a docent who explained details for us about the painting. They didn't let us take photos in the refectory itself, but we got this one of Prince Charming with a replica just to capture the memory of being there. Milan was good for our own personal last supper as well. Finally tired of pasta, we went to a sushi restaurant, and also a sort of bakery-salad place with communal tables. Both delicious.

Your Turn

Have you been or are you planning to go to Italy over the holidays? Comment below on your experience and let us know if you have any questions.