Still Deeply in Labneh, I Mean Love

Warning: Cheese Factor High

1341914125I intend to get a little bit cheesy with this post, just to let you know that the romance is still alive out here, just a few days after our three month wedding anniversary.

Photo proof is a must, of course.

To the left is one of the gorgeous meals Charming put together on a recent low-key night in.

The white cheese slices are labneh, which we eat almost constantly. Labneh is a Middle Eastern cheese product so ubiquitous and so varied in its forms (yogurt labneh, creamy labneh, firm labneh, labneh with various seasonings) that we even made up a game inserting labneh into movie titles (ie, Rebel Without a Labneh) that was snorting good fun.

Apparently the proof of love is in the cooking. Here's another delectable light dinner Prince Charming prepared:

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The fresh produce here this summer is the stuff of legend. As I write this, I am eating a Fuerte avocado that practically peeled itself out of its own skin. The pit smiled at me and jumped into the garbage on it's own. The creamy green meat is packed with flavor and is perfectly ripe.

Even though Charming does most of the cooking, lately I've been reciprocating with my latest obsession: green smoothies.

Yumsville!

What have I learned in three months of marriage? Getting married and then moving to a land where neither of your speak the language or know anyone very well is a quick way to learn exactly how each of you respond to stress, loneliness, and a completely new environment. There have been arguments with very fast resolutions, as each of us quickly realize we better be nice to each other since we are each other's only friend here. The low times have been balanced out with the fun we've had together seeing wonderful new sights, eating delicious new food, meeting people together, and many shared frustrations, I mean adventures.

Wedding Bells in Ramallah

Charming's Co-Workers Tie the Knot

I love weddings. And I was so excited because Charming and I were invited to a local one last Sunday (July 1st). The couple were married in the Greek Orthodox church in Ramallah.Look how beautiful they look with their family and friends all around them in the receiving line:

440734_origOoh, look how beautiful the bon bons were. Along with champagne, what  a great reward for sitting through an hour-long church service in a language we don't speak yet (Arabic).
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The couple entered the reception hall maybe an hour or more after we got there: 9pm, and dinner had not been served (although we were doing just fine with drinks and appetizers) .Finally the couple begin to process in. And the process involved dancing with swords. Must be a tribal tradition.

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The dancing with swords in the entry hall lasted at least twenty minutes, with the crowd sort of slowly summoning the couple into the reception hall.Once inside, the couple were announced and they began their first dance. Not a three minute slow dance, but a long, high energy, shake-your-tail-feathers type of first dance. They just kept dancing and dancing, being joined by the crowd. Actually, I wasn't feeling so well and Prince Charming had an early morning, so we left before the first dance (going on 20 minutes) was over. By then it was around 10pm, and the bridal party showed no signs of taking a break from dancing.

Some of Charming's co-workers were there, and told us about other local weddings. Apparently when it's a Muslim wedding (this was a Christian one) the men and women party separately.

Two days after this wedding, my prince got to attend a Muslim wedding in Gaza. The men got together to drink Coke, and someone announced that the couple was now married and made a little speech. He said it lasted about 15 minutes and he even got a little party favor gift. The women were celebrating in another room. No, the bride was not present at the announcement of her marriage to the men. But the groom did get to attend the ladies celebration.

Religion Evolving

Images and Thoughts on Religion and Conflict from Bethlehem and Jerusalem

I am indeed, living in the Middle East. Home of arguably the most famous ongoing conflict in the world. I write this partially to address the situation that hangs over every  single head here.  Although people live life normally, the situation is always present because it's a part of daily life: the ongoing, deeply rooted, bewilderingly complex state of affairs between Israel and Palestine.

After going through checkpoints a number of times now, and having visited a few of the holy sites in Jerusalem this weekend, I personally have to report a surprising sense of heaviness in the air in this part of the world. It really shouldn't be surprising, since there is so much impotent rage here, yet I also expected to find a spiritual feeling here. Places that are very spiritual tend to feel light to me. Another way of saying it is the air feels thin. These thin places  seem closer to awareness, awakening, or salvation.

Instead of finding that lightness, that transformative essence, in Jerusalem, my  spirit felt weighed down. Perhaps this was because of being denied entrance to a holy site because I am not Muslim (How could they tell? The color of my skin and the showing hair on my head, I think). Perhaps because of all the checkpoints, the guns, the soldiers, and the guards. Finally, it could have been the overwhelming crowds, heat, and incessant marketing of low-value souvenirs.

Old City, Jerusalem. Taken by Prince Charming.

What I'd like to write here is coming from my own thoughts on religion, my own spiritual journey, and trying to gain clarity on how religion relates to the situation here.

It's true that I don't fully understand the situation, and I've heard the longer one lives here the less one understands it. If I don't understand it, it's going to be very hard to make any small steps toward doing my tiny little part to be a peacemaker, which is what I'm here for.  Actually, I am here because I said "Yes." Simply that. Peace is just one of the unmet needs here.

The land conflict here is certainly tribal. And religious. And those two are connected here in a way that is hard for me to understand. In the U.S. it's fairly common to separate our religion from our tribe.

There are a lot of problems with religion. Two groups very aware of these problems are thoughtful residents of the Middle East and thoughtful American religious believers. I was one of the latter group as recently as two years ago (I still consider myself a Christian, although my beliefs are such that many Christians would say that I am not one, but that's another story). Young, thoughtful believers are leaving the church in droves, leaving the remainder to ask why.

There's a common phrase people use to describe the state of their soul-beliefs. I heard it a lot in Los Angeles: spiritual but not religious. I believe that those who describe themselves this way are part of a cultural trend that will, I hope, result in the evolution of religion. In A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle writes "The new spirituality, the transformation of consciousness, is arising to a large extent outside of the structures of the existing institutionalized religions."

Religion is where spirituality and community come together.  The essence of spirituality is this: we are all connected to everyone and everything. The essence of community is this: we love each other no matter what.

Yet often religion, which should be the nexus of the two, separates us and makes it all too easy to define and differentiate between those who deserve our love and those who don't. Religion seems to specialize in black and white. Not grey.

What I know from my personal spiritual evolution is that for a long time, I couldn't handle grey area. The certainty of dogma appealed to me. Here is what is right, here is what is wrong. I still believe in absolutes truths, but I don't think any one religion has them all.

For me that moment when I could think "Ah! I don't have to actually believe, literally, that Mary was a virgin to learn from her example of purity of heart, faith, and maternal love.  She said yes. What a beautiful metaphor. Maybe I can say yes too," was a life-giving breakthrough. It freed me to have faith and spirituality without leaving my brain behind.

Entering the little door to the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem. It had to be shrunk to hobbit size to make it harder for invading armies to enter.

From that point, I realized most of what I had tried so hard to believe -- much of it unpalatable to the intellect --  were teaching metaphors, not absolute truths.  Taking them  seriously and intensely is very important.  I think this is why many people feel they must believe in such a literal way. If it's not true, it has no value for them. Yet there is great value in art, in literature, in many things created by humans to express  life-giving concepts.

I tried explaining this new paradigm to Christian friends and it didn't go over well. Finally, someone told me that religion is like a virus - its structure must stay the same or it won't replicate successfully.  Therefore, attempts to redefine it must be quashed for the religion to continue.

Perhaps the best hope for peace here in the Middle East is what Tolle calls "a large-scale opening of spirituality outside of the religious structures."

Letters squished into every available opening in the Western Wall, the holiest site in Judaism. Can you see mine? The word "love" is visible.

The men-only side of the Western Wall, viewed through the divider between the men's and the women's side.

I'm not sure anything could have confirmed my decision to change my thoughts on religion a couple of years ago more than visiting Jerusalem this weekend did. When I was in Jerusalem, it was evident to me that all three monotheistic religions come from the same source, and therefore what they teach cannot all be true in the literal sense. What was also clear is that what people here are fighting for is not love, freedom, salvation, peace, or any of the things that their religions promise. What people are fighting for is the right to identify with a place and say that it belongs to them because of what they look like, who their ancestors are, and what they call themselves. It's not about spirituality. At best, the fight is about heritage. About history.  And I believe all the people in the world should be able to respectfully visit heritage sites and pray --or not-- in the way they choose.

Women of various beliefs and backgrounds pray in their own ways at the Western Wall.

I understand the good heart behind religion; it's about helping people have hope and peace, and in tribal cases, reminding people where they come from.

I think when spiritual leaders discover that they can offer the same hope, guidance for living, and sense of community without drawing lines in the sand and separating people, religion will evolve. Lines in the sand are exhausting to maintain. They must be drawn and re-drawn constantly. Sometimes, as here, they require missiles, rocks, and machine guns to maintain. The  lines are exhausting because they are arbitrary. We are all connected. We generally  desire the same things for ourselves and our loved ones.

I believe that about Israelis and Palestinians, and I believe that about you and me. Yes indeed.

"I imagine that yes is the only living thing.” - E.E. Cummings

Right now, I'm saying yes to watching the fading light of the glorious post-sunset twilight  here on my balcony in Ramallah. The air here, on the outskirts of town, is lighter than in the big metropolis of Jerusalem. Kids scream with delight as they play on the street several levels below. It is a spiritual moment, my daily bread today. You are here with me, as I imagine you experiencing your own diverse daily bread moments all over the world.

Food Porn, Ramallah Edition

June 2012 Food Experiences

Some foodie heaven is happening in Ramallah, Palestine. I though you'd enjoy a few photos. We ate these all over the month of June. I'll add a note if the restaurant name isn't apparent in the photo.
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I made this at our first abode in Ramallah. I thought I'd sneak this in just because I'm proud of this pizza.

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Breakfast egg croissant at Zamn Cafe.

Also from Zamn. I think this is a Lebneh wrap.

Falafel sandwiches. These are actually from Bethlehem. Charming brought them back to the hotel. I was taking a nap, so I don't know where they are from.

Dessert at Tche Tche in Ramallah, June 26, 2012. As a bonus, you can kind of see my new hairstyle.

Minimizing Makeup

Happiness is a light makeup bag.

In my previous packing list, I blithely skipped over listing out individual items in the toiletry department, as most packing lists do. I shall be different, and give you the details. Anyone who wears makeup might want to see what's in my bag.Caroline McGraw  of A Wish Come Clear writes, "I’ve lessened my ‘need’ for specialty products and reconsidered cosmetics. For now, my look is simply this: moisturizer with SPF, tweezed brows, curled lashes, a touch of lipstick (or tinted Burt’s Bees balm), a little concealer and vanilla extract for ‘perfume’. You don’t need tons of makeup to look beautiful, and you can care for yourself (and the planet!) with less. There is elegance and class in going low-maintenance."Inspired, I decided to simplify my makeup routine. I do love makeup. I love playing with it. It's all a fun, artistic experiment that allows me to be vain, which I enjoy.  But stuff is suffering. Happiness is a light makeup bag. So I experimented and the results are that I've whittled down my daily use make up products to this very small grouping that make me feel  pretty, smart (because of how many multi-use items are here) and light-of-bag:


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  • 1. Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry Touch Sunblock SPF 30: Sunscreen is an always-must-use. Every single day. I make sure to put a double dose it on places that face the noon sun: the top of my nose, my shoulders, and my boobs on a perky day. I'm looking for a better sun cream since this one smells chemically and feels bad on my skin.
  • 2. Concealer: This is a little container of the remainder of a large tube I had before I left. It is Sheer Tint Base from Glo. A little goes a long way. The original tube lasted over a year. I really like this product.
  • 3. Vaseline: The Queen of multi-use products.
  1. I use this on my lips before lip color,
  2. Then I blend a little lip color with some Vaseline in my palm and use it as a cheek stain.
  3.  I use it to groom my brows.
  4. I use it on small cuts or dry hangnails.
  5. I use it to remove eye make up.
  • 1. Red color stick: This is an organic Zuzu Luxe lipliner in Hazelnut that I bought at Whole Foods in LA. It works great on top of Vaseline on the lips and as a cheek stain when blended with Vaseline.
  • 2. Eyelash curler: Revlon, I think.
  • 3. Brow Tweezers: Revlon. Also good for splinters and picking up very tiny things.
  • 4. Brow/eye liner brush tool: I can use this to groom my browns and remove clumps of mascara. I use the other end to apply:
  • 5. Gel eyeliner: Maybelline Eye Studio, in brown. I just smudge it on with the small slanted brush mentioned above and it seems somewhat waterproof.
  • 6. Rimmel Volume Accelerator Mascara: In extreme black. Ick. I don't like this formula. It clumps my lashes together. When I run out I will try something else.
  • 7. GloMinerals Revive Hydration Mist: This is a luxury item that my sister gave me, but for me it replaces powder as a setting agent and feels much better than powder in this hot, dry season. It smells and feels nice to spritz on at the end of doing make up.

Perfume to me does not count as make up. I'll have to do another post about my perfume needs, er, desires.

Finally, these are the products I use daily, but I brought more with me, and I haven't gotten rid of them… yet. I don't know if I will since, like jewelry, cosmetics don't take up much space and provide variety in looks when one's clothing choices are slim due to bag space.

Julie Gray in Tel Aviv

In one of those small miracles the universe provides, it happens that another female screenwriter with a passion for peace, creativity, and helping women, moved from Hollywood to the Middle East a few months before I did. I know, right?

Her name is Julie Gray. I found her through something she wrote for the Huffington Post, and later a mutual producer-friend in Hollywood sent us both a message: "Do you two know each other?"

I have hummed with resonance reading her blog entries about the big move. I almost feel she has saved me some writing time and certainly expressed some cultural differences in a unique and honest way that I love.

Read her adjustment-related entries here. She's living in a different area (Tel Aviv) and has a different background (she's Jewish) but a lot of what she writes is very similar to what I'm going through.

Four Different Kinds of Water Massage

Charming and I just moved into a new apartment, and it's quite posh compared to our previous digs here in Ramallah. Here are a few photos of the interior. Standing in the kitchen looking into the living room:
6112745_origPrince Charming is smitten with the kitchen and has big plans for all the delicious things he's going to cook here:
6301152_origWe love the patio:
7997155_origThe view at sunset is spectacular. I'll think about taking some nice shots of the view for a later posting. In the mean time, check out the beautiful nighttime shot of Ramallah from our old patio that Charming took and posted on his blog.

The new place has significant charms, including a shower with four different kinds of water massage and a radio. However, as of right now, the internet and hot water (as well as a long list of other lesser functions) are kaput. The landlord promised in a very passionate telephone conversation (passionate compared to US landlords, perhaps normal here) yesterday that we can trust him and that it will all be working very soon.

A Better Use for Cable Ties

This post  might make you sad or angry. I'll keep it short, because while I think it is important to share about, I don't like feeling sad and you probably don't either.Two weeks ago,  on June 12, Thomas and I  went to a lecture by Gerard Horton, a lawyer for Defense of Children International. The lecture was about Palestinian children held in military detention. It was the first time here that I'd actually been faced with this much information related to the ongoing conflict happening here. A note about Gerard. He was a British man, and his presentation was straightforward and dispassionate, which I think is the best way to be when speaking about such a political issue. He gave us the facts. The Q&A came afterward, and then we heard the passion, anger, and frustration in the crowd.

He and the organization he works with, DCI-Palestine, http://www.dci-palestine.org/  completed a four year long study of the way Palestinian children are treated when they are detained by the Israeli military. [Background info: Since 1967, Palestinians in the West Bank have been prosecuted  in Israeli military courts.]

Although the report is 142 pages to hold  the data collected from collecting the testimonies of 311 children, Gerard distilled the information down the most important point, which is that the evidence shows a pattern of inhuman treatment of minors as defined in the UN Convention against Torture.

The number one detail that strikes me when reading the report is the brutal use of cable ties to hold the children's wrists together behind their backs. It was the number one complaint of detained children, present in 95% of cases.

One child said "Soldiers tied my hands behind my back with one plastic cord and tightened it so hard that I still feel pain in my right thumb which sometimes goes numb."

A better use for cable ties might be to hold cables in place, as illustrated in this picture I took in the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem:

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There are many other issues of concern. Just a few of them:
  • Child is blindfolded (90% of cases)
  • Physical violence (75% of cases)
  • Arrested between midnight and 5 am (60% of cases)

Often the children are woken up from sleep by soldiers in their rooms pointing guns at them.

Gerard gave us a copy of the report. There's a lot of information in there, but the positive part that would improve the situation are four major recommendations DCI lawyers make that would "provide a series of simple and practical protective measures."

  • An end to night time arrests.
  • Children have access to a lawyer prior to questioning.
  • All interogations be audio-visually recorded.
  • Every child to be accompanied by a parent.

After the lecture and a short video, a man stood to ask the first question. He spoke in Arabic for about ten minutes. I was so bewildered that I almost left. I can't imagine a moderator at a U.S. lecture letting a question become a speech. Finally someone handed me a headset so I could hear the translation into English, which was happening simultaneously. It turns out that he'd been detained in the same prisons shown in the presentation and he was telling his story.

Others, both English and Arabic speaking, spoke with similar passion. "Why isn't the International community doing anything about the occupation? Why isn't United States doing anything?"

Rubbery Ice Cream

1339668075This evening before attending a lecture, we went for our first taste of Rukab's ice cream. In this photo I'm trying to demonstrate the rubbery nature of the delicious Mint Chocolate Chip. Wikipedia explains it best: "One hallmark of Ramallah is Rukab's Ice Cream, which is based on the resin of chewing gum and thus has a distinctive taste."

I found the taste to be generally more or less a normal ice cream taste, but the texture was ever so slightly chewier. Interesting. Prince Charming says that it looks like snot in this photo. Don't worry, it tasted much better than that.

More from Wikipedia so you know a little about the scene in Ramallah:

" Ramallah is generally considered the most affluent and cultural, as well as the most liberal, of all Palestinian cities,[50][51] and is home to a number of popular Palestinian activists, poets, artists, and musicians. It boasts a lively nightlife, with many restaurants including the Stars and Bucks Cafe, a branch of the Tche Tche Cafe and the Orjuwan Lounge, described in 2010 as two among the 'dozens of fancy restaurants, bars and discotheques that have cropped up in Ramallah in the last three years.'[36]"

So far I haven't been to any discotheques (ever in my life?!) but I can say the folks here in Ramallah can rightfully boast about the food. It's exceeded my wildest expectations. Huge portions and everything is fresh. They season with a lot of lemon juice and parsley, two of my favorite flavors.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bug Bites and Black Belts: The Little Things Are Big Things

5054374Yesterday was a tough day of little challenges. I couldn't sleep, and in the morning, I was complaining to my prince about the extreme itchiness and discomfort I was experiencing from the bites from whatever tiny creatures inhabit our mattress. Or, I theorized, were the bites from mosquitos? Could he ask the people at the office if they had any advice? He was sipping the morning coffee that I made him in front of an open window, and looking doubtful that among all the saving children, he was going to have time to ask about the possibility of bugs in our mattress. I looked at the open window and got up to slide the screen shut, giving him a "the least you could do is shut the screen to keep the bugs out" look. Then we argued about the insect life in Rammallah, Palestine, vs. Lumberton, NC. He went to work. I cried my eyes out for an hour, loudly, relishing the fact that no one I knew was going to hear me and ask any questions.  I rallied, called him, and resolved our stupid little argument. I found the pain-relieving spray (see photo) that Prince Charming had, of course, thought to pack, covered my skin with it, and slept blissfully for four hours.

Later, doing the dishes, I was scrubbing a hardened flake of oatmeal off a cup. My hand slipped, shunting the sharp shard of oatmeal under my fingernail. A small cut, a small annoyance. But damn it, couldn't something just go right today?When Prince got back from work, I told him that if something big and horrific happened to us, like something like the people back home are afraid will happen to us (crime, terrorism, etc.) we'd get through it. Our "I'm a tough survivor" instinct would kick in. Adrenaline would flow, and we'd roll with the challenges like it was our job. And people would think we were so tough, so heroic.We laughed and laughed about how it's really the little things that are the big things. He reminded my about how he'd stubbed his toe hard a week back, and even though it was just a stubbed toe, damn it, it was sore for days, and he had a lot of walking to do. So long to impressing his new staff with his powerful gait.I was reminded of when I was at a Tae Kwon Do Tournament as a teenager. I had just sparred with a huge, Amazonian warrior black belt with legs twice as long as mine, and a deadly, "I'm from the Bronx and I've killed girls just like you," look in her eyes. (It's my story, I'll embelish a little. Okay?) I was tough. I was brutal. I fought hard. I got kicked in the stomach and the face. I didn't cry. I probably won the match, but the point is that my instructors, my teammates, everyone was telling me I was One Tough Cookie. And let's be honest, I was. There weren't a lot of girls like me in my peer group.But what happened later was that I had to stay  for hours supporting my teammates. I wandered around the tournament, getting increasingly hungry, thirsty, and tired. This was right at the beginning of puberty, and I was just beginning to learn that I had a blood sugar issue and I would feel wonky if I didn't eat every three hours.

I didn't feel hungry, but I felt lost. I began to cry. I wanted to lie down. I remember that my instructor came over to me and said "What's wrong?" I shook my head, saying something like "I don't know, ahhh! I don't know….no snack yet, I lie down here?"

He gave me the most bewildered look, and said something like "You just beat Bronx girl, and now you are crying?"

It was a Little Things are Big Things moment. It's not the big fight that'll get you. It's missing your snack two hours later.

Goats Staring Me Down

Goats Staring Me Down

Around Ramallah

 

Early this morning I went for a very short jog on Al-Teera, the main road in Ramallah that is acceptable for women to run on alone from what I understand.  I paused to take this photo of pink flowers and a minaret in the background: flowers

 

Later, I noticed our neighbors were grazing their goats in the front yard:

Goats

 

And finally, here is the amazing view from where we are staying right now. It's a good general view of a lot of the city, as well as a lovely grove of olive trees in the valley below:

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Seventeen Hours, Breast Size, and Marriage

After 17 hours sitting next to my seat mates, I got pretty chummy with Ala and Albert. Chummy enough for Ala to reach over and turn my magazine pages faster than I was turning them so she could see "Who Wore it Best" in Hollywood. Chummy enough for her to comment on the wonderfully perfect size of my breasts, as compared to the fake ones on the model in the magazine. 17 hours will do that to you. After the flight,  a person named Toby with Delta emailed an apology for the problems with the flight.  Toby wrote:

"I can only imagine how disappointed you must have been when our aircraft had to return to the gate multiple times for maintenance reasons. Additionally, we are genuinely apologetic that you arrived at your destination much later than scheduled."

He backed up his sorrow with $100 credit and 7,500 bonus miles. It's cool, Toby, that was just four more hours I got to spend with Ala and Albert. About the age of my own parents, Ala and Albert were an adorable Russian-American (Ohio) couple who'd been married for 32 years. He got less sleep than her because he let her sleep cuddled up on his shoulder or lap for the whole night. He even got up for about an hour so she could sleep on both of their seats. Her knees were hurting her.I asked her what their secret was. She said she picked a good one - a man who is just as wonderful now as  he was the day she married him.

"Even though he's getting a little belly," she said as she patted his tummy affectionately. Albert grinned a tad sheepishly. Ala continued: "It doesn't feel like it's been 32 years. Not at all."

Why I'm So Happy

01 I leave tomorrow for Tel Aviv.

Rarely have I been so happy as now, because I am now at rest, with my family in North Carolina, and in complete vacation mode. But that is not all; a lot of my happiness is from the excitement of planning future adventures, of knowing they will come.

It's the Alternating Theory of Happiness. My happiness is greater because I know going to a new place involves a lot of discomfort, risk, and learning.  Without those challenges, I becoming irritating and gain weight.

But now I revel in my current comfort, not bored with it, knowing that I'll be challenged soon enough. Alternate experiences always show up.

//

I'm really looking forward to seeing my prince charming again. It's been a long three weeks away from him.

//

For those of you who feel things deeply and like to experience far out places, my prince's micro-blog Last Stoppers is worth bookmarking. He updates it with photos and words about Last Stops. What is a Last Stop? Click over to his blog to find out.

The Real Packing List

To: The Middle EastTrip Duration: Two Years

The packing situation for this trip was exceptional because we plan to be abroad for at least two years. Our home apartment in the West Bank will be our home base from which we will travel to Turkey, Greece, Egypt, and more.Since Prince Charming's company paid for the cost of shipping, we had three boxes sent our ahead of time. Well, those boxes are still sitting in customs. No matter, we'll get them sometime. Nothing in there was vital, mostly books and a few things to make our home more comfortable for us. The important point is that we didn't have to have those boxes sent. We sold and gave away most of our stuff before we left California, and we probably would've gotten rid of everything if the organization hadn't paid for us to bring a few boxes over.

So this list, which leaves out those non-essential in the boxes, is what I brought with me on the plane, the Real Packing List. (Not what I affectionately refer to as the Travel the World Indefinitely Packing List, which is even more minimal and is aspirational for me at this point).

First, a photo of almost everything (except for what I mention below) that went into two checked bags:

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The Real List

    • One long, multicolored skirt.
    • Black skirt, knee length, classic
    • Black skirt, calf length, vintage silk lace
    • Reversible quick-drying work-out & yoga pants
    • Multi-colored dress, knee length
    • Black jacket, heavy cotton blend, double breasted style
    • Pink and grey workout jacket, quick drying, sporty
    • Grey cardigan, long, basic
    • Tan sweater, cropped
    • Black cardigan, short sleeved, flowy
    • Blue silk scarf, Mozart print
    • Pink umbrella, travel size
    • Ivory tee, v-neck
    • Black tank
    • Tan tank
    • Black tee, scoop neck
    • White hat, wide brimmed
    • Black hat, ball cap
    • Regular bra
    • Strapless bra
    • Lingerie
    • 12 pairs knickers
    • Two bikinis, interchangable colors, bikini bottoms double as knickers
    • 5-7 pairs socks
    • Black belt, skinny, woven
    • Tan and black belt, wide
    • Sunglasses
    • Gold flip flops
    • Silver heels
    • Red hand bag
    • Two neck stashes (one I'm bringing to my prince)
    • Two blank journals
    • Clothes drying cords, Rick Steves brand
    • Assorted kitchen-ware for my prince
    • Tape
    • Scissors
    • Pens
    • Pencils
    • Checkbooks
    • Small flashlight
    • Camera lens cover (bringing for my prince)
    • Assorted CD's (mostly for learning Arabic)
    • Camera
    • Video camera
    • Assorted cables for: phone, Kindle, camera
    • Batteries
    • Plug adaptors
    • Assorted jewelry
    • Assorted hair accessories
    • Pantiliners
    • Lunette (way better than pads or tampons in so many ways, ladies)
    • Small microfiber towel
    • Two nighties
    • Blue robe, vintage silk
    • Assorted toiletries: makeup, wet wipes, skincare, sexessories, etc.

And this is what I kept out until the last minute (plane outfit, workout clothes and shoes) and the things that went in my carry-on:

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After my last workout before getting on the plane, I put these items into my checked bags:

  • Running/hiking shoes
  • sports bra (doubles as bikini top)
  • Black & white tank top, halter, quick-drying fabric
  • Black shorts, quick drying fabric
  • Mesh bag for dirty laundry
  • Laptop and charger
  • Mousepad
  • Mouse
  • Phone & Charger
  • Razor
  • Yellow pad of paper

Then there's what I wore on the plane:

  • Red tank with shelf bra
  • Red and white striped t-shirt, flowy scoop neck
  • turquoise necklace
  • Dark rinse jeans, wide-leg high-waist trouser style
  • Black and tan ballet flats

All that's left to list is what I carried on with me:

  • Travel documents (passport, forms, etc)
  • Wallet with cash, CA drivers license, debit cards, coins
  • Black Moleskine journal
  • Kindle
  • Cell phone
  • Cell phone charger
  • toothbrush
  • small makeup kit
  • toothpaste
  • hand moisterizer
  • comb
  • one pair of socks
  • extra pair of knickers
  • My prince's old sweater-shirt for warmth and snuggling

And that concludes the real list!

Things I'm Leaving Out Until the Last Minute

Things I am leaving out of the bags I'm packing for the Middle East move until the very last minute:

  • Phone and charger
  • Journal
  • Kindle
  • Computer, mouse, etc.
  • Wear-on-plane outfit
  • toothbrush

It's a very basic list, but writing this list down helped me decide what to pack first. I was feeling overwhelmed and not sure where to start, so I sat down and created this short list before I could move on to the big list. The point here is that packing to go abroad for two years is a big job; to make it a little less daunting, divide it up into small parts and promise yourself a break after completing just one of those small parts.