How Artists and Writers are Usually the Opposite of Driven Business Types

Today I got an update from Jonathan Fields of Good Life Project. He interviews all kinds of people who are changing the world in a meaningful way. I’m a fan of his show, and read the bio of the man he recently interviewed, Chip Conley. Here are a couple snippets.

“As the founder of the legendary hotel group, Joie de Vivre, he shattered the status quo for excellence in hotel leadership and customer experience.”

and

“Chip was riding the crest of the wave. Then things went south…

With his success as an author he began traveling the country speaking to packed houses. But the hellacious schedule found him undernourished both creatively and physically. While on stage his body failed him in the most profound way. He literally died on stage. Chip’s heart had to be restarted several times in the amublance to the hospital.

He made it through, but it was a wake-up call. Conley wasn’t here just to build an empire, he was here to create meaning.”

The thing is, we’ve heard this story so many times. Ambitious business person experiences stress-related health problems and realizes life is about more than making money.

When artists, dreamers, and creatives hear this story, we simply can’t relate.

The “lesson” seems obvious. We start out in life instinctively knowing that this journey isn’t about empire-building, but rather, about meaning-building. In fact, we may wish we could focus a little more on making money — like Chip Conley before his heart attack.

However, what the artist instinctively knows about life is a huge gift, and also a massive head start. Some people need a heart attack to slow them down and get them to focus on what’s important. For others, it’s natural.

 The challenge for artists, creatives, and dreamers who want to make meaning AND money is to focus on consistently building habits, or rituals, that combine both business skills and heart-based creation.

The way to start is through the 12 Rituals for Art + Income.

Genghis Khan Golan

We Came, We Saw, We Ate Chocolate

Our planned road trip for this vacation.

I figured as long as I was going to name this post after a Mongolian conquerer who has nothing to do with the Golan, I might as well throw in a reference to a Roman conquerer who also has nothing to do with the Golan.Except, well, the area does have a history of being conquered.  With it's natural resources -- soil made fertile by ancient volcanic eruptions, a large freshwater lake, naturally occurring wind tunnels, and mountain ranges great for military look-outs -- it's an enviable piece of land.As far as I can tell, the history is similar to that of the rest of Israel.  (By the way, this will be an amateur and probably incorrect brief history.) There were people living in the Syrian Golan in relative peace from many different ethnoreligions: in this case, Muslims, Jews, and Druze. With the influx of Jewish settlers in the mid 20th century, Syria got warlike and brutal. Israel conquered the area in 1968, and Syria tried to get it back during the Yom Kippur war of 1977, but Israel was able to beat them back. Since then, it has been Israel's most peaceful border, thanks in part to a UN peacekeeping group. Now the area is known for wine, chocolate, waterfalls, and being green.

The Packing Story

Despite the name of this blog, I do not like to pack. In fact, one of my goals with this blog is to make packing easier on myself and others. I like to spend minimal time packing, and still have everything I need, while traveling as light as possible. Oh, and looking as chic and non-touristy as possible. (you'll rarely find me wearing tracksuits or socks with sandals, although I have stooped to the occasional usage of a fanny pack).So to prove to myself that I am learning something about packing, I gave myself a 15 minute limit to pack for this  four day trip.And I failed. 15 minutes turned into 45 minutes, and with the contents of my wardrobe exploded  all over my room, my resolve was weak and I was vulnerable to temptation, which came in the form of friends downstairs in the cafe inviting me to have drinks with them.  So I went downstairs and celebrated life, and a couple hours later, finally finished packing. And packed it all in a tiny day backpack and a little computer brief case-type thing.  I don't have photo proof, so you'll just have to take my word for it, okay?

Hitting the Road

We started our road trip just north of Jerusalem in our home of Ramallah, Palestine, and went up to the top of Israel where the Sea of Galilee is -- the freshwater lake that marks the entrance to the Golan. (You can just make out that Sea on the map inside all the blue placemarkers).  From there we traveled higher to the Golan Heights, a large plateau ridged with a few mountains. A bit further north, and we would've been in Syria, where no sane person wants to be right now.A few days before our trip, I was doodling on a white board, and drew a figure that Prince Charming said reminded him of a Young Genghis Khan. So I turned it into an inspirational poster:

 

The funny thing is, we spent the first night of our Golan trip in a Mongolian Yurt, at a camp called Genghis Khan in the Golan.

 

Truly, as the brochure read, our yurt was  "The Hilton of Tents."

 

From there, we hiked to a view of the Sea of Galilee, where, according to the New Testament, most of Jesus' sermons and miracles took place. Jesus would not be happy to note that many hillsides around the Sea of Galilee are now off limits due to mines left over from the previously described warfare.

 

Saint Peter, however, would be happy to note that tourists in the area are enjoying the local delicacy -- fried "Saint Peter Fish".

 

The Golan Heights area is known for its lush wet seasons, but in October anywhere in Israel or Palestine, one is mostly going to see parched land, and that was  certainly the case for this road trip.

 

" data-mce-

After about all the brown we could handle, we saw this signrising out of the aridity, promising something that seemed improbable.

 

Despite TLC's advice to the contrary, we went chasing waterfalls. And we were rewarded when, just off the highway, there was a gorge split by a respectable-for-dry-season waterfall accessorized by layers of greenery.

 

Later, it was time to explore wine country. We went to the visitor's center in Qatzrin ("the Heart of the Golan") where we watched a 30-minute recruitment video that had us both momentarily wishing we were Jewish so we could move to the Golan, meet a handsome cowboy, fondle the  rich loam, get drunk on pure mountain spring water, and have incredibly gorgeous, healthy children. Perhaps in another universe. In this one, we would go on to get incredibly lost and frustrated driving in circles, and eventually find one of the boutique wineries we'd been hearing about.

 

This family-owned place was run by a married couple, their two adult children, and the spouses of those children. This arrangement would be a dream come true for some people, but I must say I smelled something awry within the rich emotional bouquet that made up the atmosphere of the place. Mrs. Assaf was kind and hospitable to us, bringing us perhaps a dozen (or more! I lost count!) wines to taste, but she seemed sad or distracted. Perhaps she was tired, perhaps she had been arguing with someone, perhaps the winery was too busy, or something else was worrying her. The deeper into our cups we sank, the more outrageous were the scenarios that  I dreamed up about what could possibly be leading to the slightly dour atmosphere. At any rate, the wine and snacks were delicious.

 

 A visit to a chocolate factory was more cheerful.

Even the loftiest of cocoa highs couldn't keep us from feeling deflated after a failed attempt to fill up our gas tank. There aren't a lot of gas stations in the Golan, and the one on the kibbutz where the chocolate factory was located seemed to be out of order. It took our card, but then only gave us one shekel's worth of gas. On our next try, imagine our surprise when we unintentionally purchased air for our tires from the next machine over. The attendant couldn't help us, which we assumed was because of the language barrier. But apparently not, because an American couple  who spoke Hebrew rolled up next, and had similar problems.  Despite bonding over us all being from Los Angeles, our Hebrew connection didn't help. No one left that gas station with a full tank.

 

We bumped into these folks later on Mount Bental, home of a former Syrian military bunker that is now a geographic wonder and popular vista for tourists. We chatted about how it turns out that Visa isn't a good credit card to bring on a trip to Israel.On Mount Bental, we could see into Syria and get our bearings.

 

The peak and the path to it were decorated with wooden cutouts of soldiers with guns and sculptures made by artist Yoop de Yons from old weapon parts.

My favorite meal of the whole trip was at a French restaurant I don't remember the name or location of. Roasted figs stuffed with goat cheese, followed by papardella pasta with smoked goose in wine and butter, with cream, herbs, and poached egg, all washed down with white wine.

Finally it was back down to the Sea of Galilee, where I walked on water. That is to say, I walked along the shoreline for a photo op.

How to Make Jibneh (Guest Post by Prince Charming)

Jibneh is the Arabic word for cheese. As many of you know, Charming is a talented and dedicated chef.  He enjoys challenges like trying a new recipe or cooking an unfamiliar vegetable. I've enjoyed the results of his dairy explorations and think it only fair that we share his forays into fromage with you. -GPH

How to Make Jibneh by Prince Charming

I originally started making cheese in Palestine because Cheddar costs a fortune. I did not think that Cheddar would be hard to make,  but that it would simply take a lot of time. I was wrong; it is hard to make. I found out, however that another thing I miss from home (which costs more than it should in America) is very easy to make. Basic white cheese. Also called full cream ricotta. Or queso blanco. Or paneer. Or Farmer’s Cheese, Cottage Cheese. Or, in Palestine, Jibneh.I also started making cheese in Palestine because we moved into an awesome apartment above La Vie Cafe in Ramallah. Our neighbors own the cafe and their love of DIY fit in pretty well with the way my wife and I want to live. It’s inspiring. The fact that they rave about everything I make doesn’t hurt.I wake up early for work, usually around 5am. I like watching the sunrise, and it's a good way to remind myself that I want to skip hangovers when we’re drinking cocktails at the cafe downstairs in the evening. The habit, however, is hard to break on the weekends, and I am usually lucky if I can sleep until 6am. To kill time until Genevieve wakes up I usually do something in the kitchen -- bread or cheese for the most part. Sometimes butter. I have mustard marinating right now too.

Simple White Cheese

Ingredients

A pot, 2 liters of cow milk, lemon juice or white vinegar, salt, cheesecloth. If you don’t have cheesecloth a clean cotton t-shirt or pillowcase cut up into a square will do. If you want to press the cheese, you'll need a carton (such as a cleaned out ice cream carton) with small holes sliced into it for the liquid to drain.

 

Instructions

• Heat two liters of milk in a pot until it is almost too hot to put you finger in. Don’t let it boil. turn off the heat.
• Immediately add ¼ cup (125 grams or so) of white vinegar or the juice of half a lemon, mix.
• Let sit for 20 minutes until the curd and whey have separated (when you see white chunks of cheese floating in yellowish liquid, it is done)
• Strain this through a cheesecloth. I usually tie this to my kitchen faucet and let it drain overnight, but if you want to eat it immediately just ball the cheese in the cloth and press it until most of the whey is out.
• Add a couple pinches of salt and mix.
•  If you want paneer or queso blanco, you can press the cheese slightly using heavy cans or jars set on top of the cheese in a carton. Here is how it looks pressed:

 

If you want classic American cottage cheese, mix it with a bit of cream only without pressing. Otherwise, I usually mix it with spices of some kind, cream, and put it through the food processor. It is particularly good mixed with lemon pepper, jalapenos, or zataar (Genevieve's favorite).Alternatively you can add it to pastry,  or you can use it to make lasagna.Serve with olives, olive oil, zataar, or whatever else you want.

Sawtain! (Double Health = Bon Appetit!) *** Al albak (right back atcha -- literally "to your heart") Prince Charming

3 Ways to Take Control of Your Time

 

The 4th ritual for art and income is turning your schedule into your own personal fairy tale. That means owning your time. It means not letting someone else take the reins of your day. It means having time to do the things you want and need to do — making art, working on your career or business, spending time with the people you love, and anything else you need to do.It means doing what’s important without feeling guilty or like you are forgetting a commitment.

Without further ado, here are three ways to take control of your time.

1. Find your soul-mate calendar situation. This love relationship doesn’t have to last forever, but it does need to be exclusive. Settle on one calendar set-up, and stick with it. I prefer Google calendar, but if a beautiful notebook with touchable, soft pages is what works for you, choose that. It has to be something you will use.

2.

Practice three ways to politely decline invitations or demands. If your default is “sure!” or “yes!” when someone asks you for something, it’s time to change your default response to demands on your time to something like: “No thanks.” “Let me think about it.” “Maybe…. can I get back to you?” This is the key to owning your time. We all have the same 24 hours in a day, and those who make the most of it spend those 24 hours doing activities they enjoy and that move them closer to their goals and desires.

3.

 Aim for a state of grace, not perfection. No one, least of all those with the gifts of imagination and creativity, is perfect at managing their time. We all forget appointments and commitments. Grace means saying sorry when you let someone down by forgetting a commitment. Grace means forgiving yourself and moving on when you let yourself down. Grace means high standards and higher levels of kindness to yourself and others. Take action on idealizing your schedule by asking a few people you admire how they keep track of their commitments. Then create your own unique system so that you can create your ideal schedule.

Day of the Catastrophe

I was having trouble deciding what to blog -- there are so many things I could choose from recently -- so I decided to play catch up, and tell you about a cultural moment I had back in May of this year.Nakba Day, or the commemoration of the Day of the Catastrophe, happens on May 15 each year in Palestine to mark the forced exodus of Palestinians from their homeland in 1948 and ongoing.The thrilling sound of drums and bagpipes (the latter have been curiously appropriated as the national instrument, or perhaps Scotland appropriated them from Palestine) caught me by surprise as I did some shopping in town that day, and I stopped to capture the spirit in the air. Despite it being a commemorative day, the word celebratory does more to accurately describe the sense of festivity there was as rowdy children marched, not perfectly in line, but adorably playing their drums and waving their flags. Ramallah residents try hard to stay positive in the face of military occupation, to protest only peacefully, and to mark all major holidays with a parade.

The parade phenomenon is my favorite display of ecumenicalism here, because there are only a limited number of children who play in the marching bands. These bands are called "scouts" and the groups are formed of children of various religions and both genders.

 

So the scouts come out to play for the holidays that all three major religious groups here celebrate. They play for the Muslim holidays, the Eastern Christian holidays, and the Latin Christian holidays. The scouts' proud parents of all religions come out for all the parade holidays - no matter the associated religion -- to see their children march and play.Since the Latin and Eastern Orthodox Christmases and Easters both fall on different days, the Christians of the city compromise: Latin Christians get to celebrate their Christmas day with a parade, and Eastern Christians get to celebrate their Easter day with a parade. That way there isn't parade overload and the city celebrates each major holiday only once a year, in a show of unity.

My Brother's Wedding & Back to Palestine

It's always a challenge getting back to our little slice of heaven in Palestine. Last time my taxi home from the airport broke down, forcing me to hang out on the side of the highway for an hour while a replacement came.

This time, our first flight was late, meaning our entire trip became delayed by almost 24 hours. Then upon our arrival in Tel Aviv, we discovered that the airline lost all three of our checked bags (one was filled with books donated to a local library, but yes, we still traveled with a rather un-minimalist amount of stuff).  After filing an incident baggage, we jumped in the special cab reserved for us (not one in the regular queue, which can only travel within Israel) . After a trip free of engine problems, we finally arrived home.

Home to our garden gate, that is. Morgan, our neighbor, rushed out to meet us at the entrance, explaining that we couldn't go into our house yet and it would be best to wait in the cafe for ten minutes or so.

Apparently, the bees, who live in a hive on the roof, had escaped. A swarm of them was filling the hallway

entrance to our apartment, thereby blocking our entry.  Exhausted from our voyage, we just had to laugh. We waited ten minutes, and then gingerly stepped our way through the remaining cloud of confused, tired bees to our apartment. It was wonderful to be home and great to see Jelly Bean.

The last leg of our USA trip included my brother's beautiful wedding and then a trip to the family cottage at Holden Beach.

I practiced my photography a lot at the wedding, snapping some portraits with Prince Charming's 50mm lens.

NOTE: These photos are in a very small size because the internet is very, very slow right now, which means each photo is taking several minutes to upload. I will wait as long as it takes to upload my favorite photo from the wedding in a larger size, so when you see the bigger photo, you know that's my favorite.

I also handed over the camera for this shot.

Then I stepped back to get the bigger picture, ending with the late, late Chinese lantern send-off attended by partygoers who had more stamina than I.

I took these from the balcony of the B&B on the farm where the wedding and festivities were held.

East Coast USA Travels

I'm traveling with a newly purchased MacBook Air, and bloggish things are taking me twice as long to figure out as I learn how to use this little shiny new machine. Though I almost threw this computer out the window last night, today I managed to upload some photos of our East Coast extravaganza. I'll put them in rough chronological order here.We landed in Raleigh, and started off with a quick visit with former roomie Julie, husband Brandon, and their already-a-heartbreaker handsome little guy, Ezra.

This trip is bookended by two family weddings. One has already happened, and the second happens this weekend. Here's the first happy, glowing couple.

Next was a jaunt to DC where we got to hang with Natalie, whose peaceful spirit could singlehandedly keep rockets from firing all over the globe.

Prince Charming got to live the dream of being an astronaut at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum, if living the dream means standing in front of a mural.

 

 

Natalie and her partner showed us lots of...

In the form of hospitality and grass-fed half and half  (and other goodies).

Then it was on to Maine, where we are now. Currently feeling very happy in the care of Charming's charming parents.

And getting lots of love in the form of food, like this fresh baked artisanal bread.

Finally I know what a lobster roll is.

And a Maine sunset.

I would be remiss if I didn't tell you that I failed in the packing light department for this trip. My goal was to bring the things I needed to feel stylish at two weddings and tromping through Maine and partying in D.C. Well, I brought too much. Learn from what I say, not what I do! I don't have a picture of it, but my bag is so heavy I almost fell over when I last wore it as a back pack. If you go to my Pinterest packingboard, you can see the packing goal for this trip, as well as a pin for what I packed. I went one dress and two shirts over that goal, and then I bought several clothing items. I have been jettisoning a few things along the way, but I could have thrived with far less. However, I'm enjoying having the variety on this rather long trip, so it's not all bad.  Hopefully my back will survive the heavy bag.

Plunging Headfirst Into Creative Terror

“I can’t deal with the roller coaster of creating!” Does this sound like you? One of my clients said something similar, and it got me thinking about how to deal with this particular roller coaster without tossing your cookies or, worse, falling off the ride altogether.

First, let’s acknowledge that we kind of love the roller coaster. I know I do. Creating – and the emotions that go along with it – meet my needs for variety and adventure.

Roller coasters are supposed to be fun, right? Thrilling, a little scary, but ultimately, an adrenaline-filled blast.

That was the case when Prince Charming and I rode Tatsu at 6 Flags in Magic Mountain, California. It’s billed as “the tallest, fastest and longest flying coaster on Earth.” The seats flip after you get on so your body is open and parallel to the ground. At one point, you are plunging headfirst toward the ground, with no cage or car. It feels like flying. It was terrifying.

Sadly, the emotional experience of creating is not quite as thrilling as Tatsu. I saw a graph that described the emotions during an entire project from conception to completion.

You start off optimistic about the novel you are writing. The enthusiasm! The dreams of literary fame! But very quickly that emotion drops off. You begin to feel doubt: about your abilities, your story, your characters. You begin procrastinating because the story has lost your interest. Perhaps you keep going, but now your expectations are low. To even finish would be an accomplishment, never mind the Man Booker Prize.

This is where most people give up.

But not you, because you are reading this blog post. You aren’t most people. You are focused on your own sweet growth, and making a greater contribution to the world. You know that you’ve made a promise to yourself, and you are not the kind of person who would break that promise.

HERE IS HOW YOU KEEP YOUR PROMISE TO YOURSELF.

You must know that this isn’t about pushing yourself through. That will only lead to literary constipation. This isn’t about dragging your ass to the computer, unlike the butt-in-chair advice you’ll get from many writers. That is masculine advice, and it comes from a sense of being at war with yourself. Sometimes I will advise a masculine perspective. I even recommend the book The War of Art, by Steven Pressfield, as a general guide for artists. Yet when you are emotionally low is not the time to be at war with yourself.

When you want to toss your cookies on the emotional roller coaster of creating is when you need to make it easyon yourself. Nurture yourself. Have fun. Scream. Get up and dance. Look in the mirror and tell yourself how gorgeous you look. Be silly.

Set up a writing (or painting, designing, etc.) schedule of mini-goals or baby steps on the path to finishing your novel. Reward yourself every time you finish a baby step. Make them as tiny and incremental as necessary.

Fun little baby steps and lots of rewards was how I finished my first book. It helped that I was on my honeymoon while writing the middle section, and that my rewards could be long kisses and wine-sipping Grecian sunsets. Get creative with your own rewards.

Remember, it doesn’t matter if you give up and start again 100 times. All that matters is that you picked up the pencil, laptop, camera, or paintbrush again.

Take Action

Be present to your emotions during your art creation. How are you feeling right now about your project? Write down each separate emotion. Consciously feel your way through each emotion, and then acknowledge that each of them can be helpful, as long as you choose to move through them, and not get stuck there. Emotions – all of them – help us become better artists.

I would love to read about what you do when you hit emotional low moments during creating. Please let me know in the comments area below.

New Birthday Camera!

This post is dedicated to my dad, who gave me this wonderful new camera - a Canon EOS Rebel T5i back in June. It's a powerful and lightweight DSLR that shoots HD video. Thank you Dad. This was an early present for my birthday, which I celebrated this Sunday.

I've been practicing shooting in manual a lot. Some shots of my beautiful home here.

Prince Charming views my new hobby with  pride only slightly tinged with jealousy of my brand new equipment. He's wanted me to share this hobby with him for a long time, and has taught me the basics of aperture, depth of field, exposure, shutter speed, and ISO.  I learned a lot from his assignment to shoot a chessboard.

But my favorite thing to shoot has always been people.

Shall I close this post with a weird, eyebrow-less selfie? Yes.