These are photos I took back in March 2014 of my friend Leena in Palestine. She recently got married. Congratulations to Leena and her groom. We miss you!
One benefit of simple living is the space it allows me to appreciate and create instances of detail, texture, and beauty moment-to-moment. I've been collecting close-ups in the form of photographs lately. Here are a few of them.
Some will say that art, or creation, thrives in a state of chaos. Envision the stereotype of the studio piled high with canvasses filled and empty, paint brushes, scattered fruit. See the cliche of the writer behind her desk, hidden from view by books, pages, and files stacked high.
I find that controlled chaos, or what I prefer to think of as curated or chosen chaos, is helpful for making connections that wouldn't be made otherwise, like how crashing into into someone at a packed party might help you meet a friend you would've otherwise never met.
I like chosen chaos for a certain stage in the creative process, the time when you are well into a project, deep in the jungle of it.
But, and here's how minimalism helps my creativity bloom, I like to start with a blank slate. My mind needs calm, an empty room, metaphorically and sometimes literally, to gain the deep serenity from which ideas arise.
If you never allow yourself the time to clean, clear, declutter, forgive, and take out the trash, traffic backs up, and with it the exhaust fumes of writer's block, burnout, procrastination, and distraction.
As scary as a blank canvas or empty page can be, you do need it to create something new.
One of my writing projects became the Simple Living Toolkit, which aims to help people reap a more joyful life by embracing minimalism. You can check it out here.
We moved to Arlington, Virginia on July 15th. This could be temporary, a three month visit to the D.C. area, or we could stay longer. We are here because Prince Charming is doing some consulting for a nonprofit in this area, and of course, because we have wanderlust.
Exploring a new city with a baby (now 8 months old) is a whole new world, a world troubled by fear of poop seeping out of a diaper and onto the varnished oak table of a trendy brunch restaurant. And other concerns, like is it okay if my son licks the glass window of the metro train, and is it better to deal with the sweat and back strain involved in baby wearing or the hassle of maneuvering a stroller into and out of elevators, metros, and through the narrow hallways of a trendy brunch restaurant.
We embraced wanderlust, we embraced packing lust, and now we are embracing the result of all that lust, which is a baby. Primary upside: he's adorable.
Deeply adorable. The world -- when I can sweep away the sheer weight of responsibility, thoughts of the strongly worded letters I may write to all installers and maintainers of baby-changing stations in bathrooms, and concerns about poop, germs, and poop, and poop -- is a different place when I am out with Bump.
When we are outside (and inside, and pretty much all the time except when he is extremely hungry or sleepy), Bump acts as a representative of the office of spreading glorious happiness. I watch the faces of people approaching us on the street, the stressed students, the tired tourists, the careworn business people. Those faces transform when they get a glimpse of Bump's slow sunrise smile. They slow down. They smile. Their shoulders relax just a little bit. They sigh. They say things like,
"He smiles from his heart."
"He adorable. He is like, a model baby. He is the model adorable baby."
"Does he always smile like that?"
"Is he always like this?"
Usually I say, "yes, pretty much" in response to the last two questions, but after giving it some thought, I realize that people are hoping they are special, that Bump is smiling at them, really seeing them, seeing their uniqueness and giving them a smiles that recognizes the best in them. And he is. So I may begin to answer differently, perhaps.
Perhaps sometimes I will say, "No, he's not always like this. It's you. You've got a special soul and he recognizes that and wants to give you the gift of his smile as a way to say thank you for sharing that which is good in you with the world."
Or, maybe I'll keep letting Bump's sweet smile do the talking.
This is not my bag.
I'm still learning about packing light as a mama. Bump is exactly seven months old today, and I have very little figured out as far as traveling with or without him.
This is what Bump looks like today.
During those nights when I'm waking up every few hours to feed him, I long for a weekend getaway when I can sleep through the night. But I recently took one such weekend getaway, and the entire time I felt like I was missing a limb, or at least part of one, because he wasn't nearby. I wondered constantly how he was doing and if he was okay, even though I knew he was having a great time with Prince Charming. I also had to carry my rather large breast pump and its attendant bottles and tubes. I forgot to bring milk bags, but thankfully another breastfeeding mom on the trip had brought some with her. Mommy packing is why the top picture is not my bag, but the bag of a friend who is child free.
Mommy Packing with the Kid
- Diaper bag
- Car seat
- Baby carrier/wrap
- Patience
- Baby clothes
- Blankets
- Toys
- Patience
- Pack n play bed
- Mommy's stuff
- Patience
- Sense of Adventure
- Patience
- Patience
Mommy Packing without the Kid
- Mommy's stuff
- Breast pump and accessories
- Sense of disorientation/confusion/"something missing"
- Trust (in babysitters)
- Sense of freedom
Never, during any late-night talks in the dorm with these college friends did I ever imagine that our future would find us chatting over the hum of electric breast pumps. It's funny how dreams of the future never include the less-than-glamorous parts. I had that thought recently as I scrubbed my dog's ears free of the bits of rotting animal carcass she had rolled in.
But it's all part of this magical life. The highs and lows. The sunsets and the stink.
The View from 30
I'll be turning 30 soon, and of course it's got me contemplating the future, which is one of my favorite activities. I went with the friends mentioned above on a weekend trip to Charleston to celebrate our birthdays. We counted our blessings.
Painting
It's pretty amazing to realize that we all are living out our dreams, although of course life doesn't always look or feel like we imagined back in college, when we all met. But what a privilege it is to be alive, to have my beloved, my family, my little one, and an abundance of everything I need.
2015-06-04 20.01.03
I don't know what the next decade holds, but hopefully more babies (whether for us or our friends), more writing, more travel, more learning, more laughing, and always, more love.
baby
Packing List for the Next Decade
- Love
- Curiosity
- Sense of Humor
- Meditative Mindset
- Sense of Adventure
- Patience
- Confidence
- Gratitude
And a notebook to write it down!
There was a little flurry of road trips about 7-8 months ago, before Bump arrived, and one of them was to Charleston, SC. It was a quick trip. We saw my sister-in-law and niece, and we took one of the carriage tours that the city is famous for. We admired the old fancy homes, took a quick water-view selfie, and ate a beautiful meal.
Having been raised mostly in the South, I am used to the strong connection to Civil War history places like Charleston have, including the display of the Confederate flag and monuments to fallen Confederate soldiers. However, Charming, a California boy at heart, found it strange to be surrounded by what he was educated to view as "symbols of slavery and prejudice." I tried to explain to him that most Southerners feel a deep connection to a complex and painful history, including the Civil War, but it doesn't mean they don't condemn slavery and racism.
Seven months later, I found myself back in Charleston. This was last weekend and the city was reeling in shock and grief from the murder of nine of its African-American citizens who were killed in cold blood by a maniac who explained his actions by saying he wanted to start a race war.
In the aftermath three days ago, South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley called for the Confederate flag to be removed from the State House building in Columbia, South Carolina, saying it was a "deeply offensive symbol of a brutally offensive past." Hopefully this act will help create a more inclusive, unified state that can heal from the racially motivated act of violence that rocked the state and the country.
During this recent weekend trip, signs hung all around the city, declaring unity and thoughts of sympathy to the families of the slain and the church they belonged to. The photo at the top of this post shows one of those signs, displayed in the city market and signed by passersby.
I was there with three college friends to celebrate our 30th birthdays, which we did mostly by talking, relaxing by pool and beach, and by going out for fish tacos.
After tacos Saturday night, we walked next door to an outdoor art showing we'd passed by earlier in the day. The large, graffitti-inspired murals had been a backdrop for an inclusive community event earlier that was open to the public. We arrived after the event closed, but walked around the outdoor area to one of the murals that was lit with votive candles lined up under it.
We held hands and said a prayer for Charleston as dusk deepened. A fellow latecomer arrived to the art event on a bicycle and offered to take a group photo for us.
This second Charleston trip was just as beautiful as the first, but marked by a turning point that will hopefully bring good out of evil for the city.
Prince Charming and I picked a weeknight earlier this month and went to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina for two days and a night.
We said goodbye to Bump...
... who was in good hands with my mom caring for him, then escaped for some much needed couple time.
In Lumberton, NC (where we are now), if you say "I'm going to the beach" without further elaboration its assumed you are going to Myrtle Beach. Myrtle Beach is about a two hour drive (or less if you have a lead foot) from Lumberton. It's a kind of Atlantic City of the South without the gambling. The family-friendly getaway is populated with an abundance of mini golf courses, water parks, and theaters. Everything is given a fun theme, including most restaurants, all mini golf, and most theater productions (Medieval Times, pirates, etc). And then of course, there's the beach where you can relax between thematic experiences.
It was a fun little romantic getaway. We stayed in an AirBnB condo on the 11th floor of an oceanfront building and woke up to the beautiful sunrise in the top photo. We took sleepy selfies:
The night before we'd gone to see the The Carolina Opry, a musical variety show at the Calvin Gilmore Theater. A lot of the music was country-western type stuff I wasn't familiar with, but there were also some great covers, including a thrilling rendition of Dolly Parton's made-famous-by-Whitney-Houston I Will Always Love You. We also laughed that the ubiquitous "Let it Go" from Frozen somehow made it into the show as well.
Hungry after sitting in the theater for a couple hours, we made a pit stop at a hole-in-the wall pizza joint. A total gamble that paid off with some of the best pizza I've ever had. Check it out if you're craving pizza in Myrtle Beach. It's in this strip mall:
It's called New York Pizza. Trip Advisor displays love-it-or-hate-it reviews. Maybe they have off-nights. The couple that owns it is Lebanese, so Prince Charming chatted with them about his visit to Lebanon when we lived in the Middle East. I begged for the secret to the pizza, but they wouldn't reveal it, although there were some hints about fresh garlic, thyme, oregano, and how it's all in the crust.
Charming's favorite food experience during the trip was a fried oyster sandwich he had at Noizy Oyster. I was raving equally about my dish of raw oysters there.
For a delicious brunch the next morning we went to Johnny D's Waffles and Bakery where we had eggs Benedict, a large fruit plate, and some sort of banana coconut waffle the server described as "so heavy it kind of condenses on itself." Yeah.
I don't usually care what a restaurant looks like as long as the food is good and it's not too loud to have a conversation, but Johnny D's interior added icing on the waffle with charming hand-painted seascape murals on each wall.
I ate a lot since that morning we'd woken up early with the aforementioned sunrise and I'd gone for a run on the beach. Charming got a picture of the end of my run as I'm looking for him on our 11th floor balcony.
It was fun to show Charming around Myrtle Beach, a place I've visited many times growing up Lumberton, but that he'd never been to.
Prince Charming, Bump and I visited our first powwow as a family on May 3, which, not coincidentally, was a full moon.
The Dance of the Spring Moon is a well-known event hosted by the Lumbee Tribe here in the Robeson County, NC area. In an article about the powwow in the local paper, The Robesonian, an attendee said that he heard that this event was well known in the Native American community for having the best drummers.
The annual Spring event would be a great one for visitors to the area to attend any year. The environment is friendly and educational and all are welcome to enjoy the atmosphere and learn about the various ceremonial dances and traditions of the Native American Tribes who attend.
ReidTerri
I attended sessions at Book 'Em North Carolina in Lumberton this year, and somehow finagled my way into speaking on a panel at the book fair and writer's conference.
Seated with me on the "Making Money Writing" panel were several other authors, including Terri Reid, who I admire for her prolificacy in writing (14 books in 5 years!) and in life (she has 7 children).
This powerhouse author has sold over one million books.
Her advice? You'll get to read a bunch of it in my upcoming book about habits of successful creatives, which she graciously agreed to be interviewed for.
My essential takeaway from what she said at Book 'Em was to write and publish regularly. Once you have an audience, they want to keep enjoying your work. So give them what they want: new books. She publishes hers in a series. Check out her site here.
My other lesson learned from the conference is that traditional publishing is in a state of chaos. Self-publishing is probably the way to go, especially if you have some skills in social media and marketing.
I wrote this blog post about my path to self-publishing on Kindle. It's remarkably easy. The part that takes time is writing, rewriting, editing, and proofing your book. But once you've written your book with the help of a supportive group of beta readers, you can self-publish for free (or almost free) very easily via Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing.
This new website will help me better serve those of you interested exclusively in minimalism, which has sometimes been a topic here. I list some great free resources on the site, and my books and courses on minimalist living will be available for purchase there as well.
Packing Lust will continue to be a place where I blog on travel, packing lists, minimalism, the writing life, and my personal/family life. However, most of my writing about simple living and minimalism is part of the free email series over at SimpleLivingToolkit.com.
Questions? Put 'em in the comments and I'll answer them there too.
I started off 2014 in cold water.
After feeling like just another member of the hoard of tourists that constantly pulse through Venice, Italy, we found a remarkably local-feeling celebration in the city on New Years Day, 2014. It was at Lido Beach, at an annual event of the Ibernisti club. I joined a bunch of other so-called "hibernators," mostly middle-aged men clad in Speedos and ladies in swim caps, in a celebratory plunge into the ice-cold Adriatic sea. (Anyone is invited.) Scroll down to the lower part of this blog post to read details.
During the ensuing adrenaline spike, I enjoyed a warm lentil sausage soup, and, improbably, the sounds of my Carolina upbringing as a live band played Beach Music there on that Italian beach.
In February we spent some time enjoying the not-so-dry season of the dry lands around Israel and Palestine, including the examination of an extra large hole in the ground.
As Spring came to Palestine, I spent a lot of time at Juthour, the arboretum nurtured into being by our tree-loving friends, American-Palestinian couple Morgan and Saleh.
Out on the land, I enjoyed long walks with Jelly Bean, getting away from the commotion that came with living in the city center of Ramallah, and picnics with a dear group of friends that we became close to and who made Palestine feel like home into our second year there.
As the year wore on, I started to feel the pangs of wanderlust.
In April, while celebrating our two-year wedding anniversary at the beach in Tel Aviv, we scheduled a visit to a doctor nearby and learned that the home pregnancy test I'd recently taken was correct.
I was pregnant! We'd been trying for what seemed like a while and had been discouraged and thought it might never happen. After we heard that little heart beat, we joyfully called our family to share the news.
In the first half of the year, we had the pleasure of hosting some friends in Palestine.
When Kimberly visited us, we had the usual Dead Sea shenanigans, plus some new explorations in Nazareth and Jerusalem.
In late June and early July we took a big trip to the USA that included a cruise with a stop in Canada. We saw New York City; Boston; Halifax, Nova Scotia; then Portland, Oregon; Los Angeles; and San Francisco. I had an inspiring bowl of Pho. We went on a cruise with family and I have a wonderful memory of soaking in a hot tub on deck with my dad and siblings as evening came on and Hurricane Arthur pelted our faces with cold sideways rain.
We arrived back to a summer of chaos and bloodshed in Gaza. In our home in the West Bank, we were never in danger, but our hearts went out to the people who lost so much during the escalation in Gaza, those whom Prince Charming served in his position with a large humanitarian aid organization.
August and September were bittersweet, as we prepared to leave our friends in Palestine and looked forward to giving birth in the U.S., surrounded by family and friends. My belly was growing, and I looked forward to being able to not worry about overcoming a language barrier with healthcare providers in the U.S.
Morgan spoiled me with a spa day that included an all-natural face mask that made me look like an alien.
I ate a lot of bananas and drank a lot of green smoothies.
We visited Armageddon (underwhelming) and the Bahai Gardens in Haifa (wow).
And we said goodbye.
We arrived in Lumberton, North Caroline where we've been staying with family. They have been so generous in giving us a place to land in the U.S. so that Prince Charming can take a sabbatical and enjoy new fatherhood.
Once settled, we set up the baby stuff and took some short trips: babymoons to the Richmond, Virginia area; to Holden Beach and Asheville, North Carolina and to Charleston, South Carolina. We met the medical staff who'd be attending the birth of our baby.
Then, just before we were scheduled to sit down for a Thanksgiving feast with lots of extended family, I started to feel the birthing waves begin.
Some fifteen hours later, he arrived. Our beautiful son.
We spent the rest of the holiday season lost in Babyland, the reason this blog post is so late. It's an enchanting place to travel to and get lost in. It's a hormone high every time he coos or caws. It's been so fun to get to know this little boy who gets bigger and brighter every day. Time is flying.
Packing Advice on Packing Lust
IN 2013, I posted only one packing advice article on packing lust. in 2014 I did a little better, and posted 5, with a little help from others:
I'm happy with the increase in posts about what to pack this year.
Professionally
Professionally, 2014 saw me simplify my web business situation, combining my coaching practice with Packing Lust. I continue to learn and grow as a creative entreprenuer. I have some changes planned for 2015 to clarify what I do and make my site easier to navigate so visitors can find what they are looking for. Sales of Minimalist Living were strong in 2014 and the Facebook community continues to grow. The Minimalist Living page had around 6,000 "likes" at the end of 2014. I worked on my next book, which will be about the habits required to make a living as a writer or artist, in 2014, but did not make my goal to have it finished and published in 2014. Hopefully I will publish it in 2015. I want to share what I've learned about making money from my writing, but I want to test what I've learned before I do so. I want to earn more income myself through the application of the habits and practices I've been studying. Then I'll share what I've learned in the book since one of my professional goals is to help other writers do the work independent creative work they want to do and get paid for it.
It's 10:01pm on the final day of the one-week Your Turn Challenge and, after a weekend out celebrating a wonderful wedding, I almost forgot to blog today. I'll keep it brief with what I learned from blogging for seven days in a row. It was a valuable experiment. I learned that it takes dedication to blog every day, even for just one week. I learned that I do not want to continue, at least for now. I may revisit the idea of "shipping daily" later. For now, I'll return to keeping my daily writing private. It was a useful exercise to think daily about things you, dear blog reader, may want to read. My daily writing is self-centered. After all, it is personal; no one reads it except for me.
One thing I like the idea of doing in the future is a limited series of daily posts, perhaps on one topic or in one genre. Let me know in the comments if you have ideas for a future series.
It's Day 5 of the Your Turn Challenge, and the optional daily question is:
What advice would you give for getting unstuck?
I've heard this term "unstuck" a lot lately. It's either a trendy word or it's that reticular activator thing.
You feel stuck. You'd like to travel the world but you just can't get out of the situation you're in.
Everywhere you turn, you encounter another obstacle that makes it feel like you can't move.
-Your lack of vacation time
-Your fear of flying
-Your fear of getting lost, robbed, or just looking like a fool
-The 50 pound cat your mother gave you
You keep turning, and you'll keep encountering obstacles. You know there's probably a solution to each obstacle, but thinking about that hits a little too close to the truth: the obstacles are excuses.
There are two obstacles that are probably really at play:
1. No one in your circle of friends travels the way you want to travel. So you don't know what it looks like, feels like, or smells like. You have no reference and you'll have no real support.
2. You aren't willing to sacrifice what you need to give to take the trip: the difficult conversation with your boss, the time to attend the hypnosis sessions to beat your fear of flying, or the guilt and/or worry that comes with letting a stranger cat-sit.
If you have travel dreams and you feel stuck at home, know this: travel does require a degree of discomfort. Not just when you're on the road (or in the sky), but when you're interviewing strangers to look after your overweight cat, or when you are mispronouncing words in a foreign language.
So don't go. Don't do it. It's too hard. It's going to exhaust you, stretch you, and test you.
What? That's what you want? You want to get out of your comfort zone?
In that case, getting unstuck is simple. Take one step forward, even if it's a little scary and uncomfortable. Just one. And then the next.
Then bring back your courage as a souvenir. Share it with your friends. Travel - and growth - is contagious.
Where In the World Are We?
We are currently staying in Lumberton, a small town in southeast North Carolina where my family lives, and where we chose to have our first baby.
The Ecstatic Birth of Our Son
The birth of our son was an incredible experience at the local hospital. We had competent and caring healthcare providers, including a nurse who told us she was leaving her job soon and wished our birth could've been her last because it was so touching.
Prince Charming held me in his arms for the ecstatic final moments (or was it hours?) of my 15 hour overnight labor. He skipped the lavish Thanksgiving feast (that he helped cook) to be there for every moment. I rewarded him by hitting him (apparently, although I have no recollection of that) when he came too close to me with breath smelling of powder-cheese snack crackers.
Magic and Romance
Parenthood has been magical. Our little boy is so deliciously perfect he's almost edible. We delight in snuggling with him and kissing his chubby cheeks. I give him new nicknames every hour. Charming likes to discuss solutions to world hunger and poverty with him.
New parenthood has also been hard. Hard, as in, sleepless and grumpy. The romance has taken a predictable hit. You know things are bad when, asked what he would like for his birthday, your husband says "just be nice to me."
Please keep in mind my sleep-deprived and cranky state as I describe our current location.
Lumberton, The Ugly
Located in Robeson County, NC, Lumberton is known for its violence, drug-trafficking, and obesity.
Parts of the county are considered a food desert. It's franchise fast-food for as far a the eye can see. And the eye can see far, as the land is flat here in this part of the state. My high school cross-country team would go to the man-made byway overpasses to do hill training.
There are no independent coffee shops or bookstores. Two recently opened businesses include a drive-through Starbucks and a large, almost warehouse-sized sex shop.
Lumberton, The Love
There are some things to love about Lumberton. Most importantly, my family is here, and they are immensely loveable.
It's got that slow-paced, small-town friendliness. We were standing in line at the post office, asking the attendant a question about the location of some government offices she didn't know the answer to. Three people in line behind us volunteered answers and other helpful tidbits.
People here are kind, friendly, hospitable, and truly caring. They have time for each other. There isn't much elitism, and, with a population evenly divided into four main ethnicities, the racism is, at least, a fair fight.
The town is also known for its extensive healthcare facilities. It's marketed to retired couples who make use of the healthcare facilities and enjoy relatively low-cost housing.
The landscape can be beautiful, especially if you enjoy lush fields of soft white cotton buds, lanky pines, and tastefully dilapidated tobacco barns. The Lumber River hides secrets in tea-colored water that languidly flows around knobby Cyprus knees.
The weather is mild in the winter. Air conditioning is plentiful in the summer.
The Lumbee Indian tribe here has a compelling history worth reading up on. The local, incomprehensible, deep-country dialect of English has a lilting musicality.
Lumberton isn't a place I would likely choose to spend much time in if my family wasn't here. Sometimes it feels like I have a love-hate relationship with Lumberton. But the truth is, a place is really all about its people. And if that's the true, then Lumberton is a place to love.
Two travel tips for you today:
Save by Planning Ahead
According to a Wall Street Journal article published October 23, 2014, the best day of the week to buy a plane ticket is now Sunday, when prices tend to be lower. According to the Airlines Reporting Corp, you'll find the lowest price for a domestic ticket 57 days before departure, while you'll want to purchase your ticket for an international flight 171 days before departure for the best price. Those are specific numbers. You win by being an above-average planner and counting back from your intended trip dates to get your ticket on the cheapest day.
Avoid Schlepping Extra Stuff
I love this tip from one of my international traveler friends. She suggests taking pictures of souvenirs instead of buying them. Next time you're shopping abroad, pause before you hand over your cash. Take a picture instead. I snapped the top photo in a crazy flea market in Hollywood, California. This photo reminds me of the visit and takes up less space in my home than if I'd brought home one of those carafes, kettles, or bowling pins.
If you buy souvenirs as gifts, instead have someone take a nice photo of you standing in front of a landmark and give that away instead.
For more simple living tips, visit SimpleLivingToolkit.com
Last week I wrote about how some successful writers/creatives swear by posting daily. I mentioned a few examples. One I didn't mention is Seth Godin. He calls getting his thoughts published "shipping," and does it daily. Last night found me spitballing to my family about ideas I have for Packing Lust, and about how I was playing with this idea of posting daily. My sister said that Seth Godin had a daily challenge coming up soon.
I looked it up, and of course it was starting tomorrow. With such serendipitous timing, I couldn't say no. Or rather, I couldn't just imagine I would do it at some vague point in the future. So I got myself into this 7 day challenge led by Winnie Kao, the Special Projects Lead for Seth Godin.
This is what happens when you say your intentions out loud. People give you suggestions and opportunities. It happened last night and after tweeting my intentions out publicly, I was committed.
I'm doing this as an experiment to see how the rhythm of posting daily feels. I tried it years ago and I couldn't maintain it. Why'd I fail back then? Maybe I can explore that this week and figure out a way to avoid whatever the reason was.
It feels good to start following my own advice.
http://yourturnchallenge.strikingly.com/
I'm learning so much from my research into how artists make a living from their creativity. One thing that keeps coming up for folks that have quickly built a solid income up from zero is communication with their audience or fans. Not just any communication, daily communication.
How to Get Rich Quick(er)
These creatives attribute their success almost entirely to the daily post. It's a ticket to success -- and transparency or honesty, which is a huge factor in our ability to connect with our audiences or market, no matter what line of business we are in.
I'm thinking of a copywriter/ online marketing expert who writes an email every day to his followers. He teaches all his clients to write the daily email, saying it is his key to success.
I'm thinking of the author of a diet book who posts a daily vlog to YouTube sharing what she's eating and how she's living a healthy lifestyle daily, as well as advice for those who want to be healthier. She has over 300,000 subscribers.
And I'm thinking of artist Jolie Guillebeau, who built her art business up quickly by sending a daily short email with a photo of the day's work and a story or observation about it.
She still sends those emails. I'm on her list and love the daily peek into a painter/potter's mind.
It's Too Hard
So why don't I do the daily post? Why don't most creatives?
It's like the story I heard in Hollywood. A well-known screenwriter regularly teaches a sold-out seminar where he takes hours to break down and analyse the structure of the classic film Casablanca.
At the end, he promises that if all present would just repeat the exercise regularly, they will because successful screenwriters. How can he make such a promise, he asks? He knows very few, if any of his students will follow through. No one is willing to spend the time on such a tedious exercise.
Daily posts take a lot of time. I tried it a few years ago and gave up because I felt I'd over committed and couldn't keep putting in the time to come up with thoughtful posts every day.
The other major obstacle to daily posts is feeling vulnerable.
There will come a day when you feel you have nothing to write, or that what you have to share is something that feels too honest, too vulnerable. But that just might be what connects you most to your audience - what creates a strong sense of loyalty.
I'm not saying that you have to post daily if you want to make money from your art. I am saying that if you want to build an audience relatively quickly, posting daily is a tried-and-true method. Of course, one you have an audience, you have do have to actually sell something to them. But that's another topic for another day.
Don't Do What I Do
So, do as I say, and not as I do. Post daily if you want to quickly cultivate a passionate audience for your work.
And maybe one day soon I'll find a way to post daily too.
Happy New Year! I'm still a bit happily lost in new baby land, so what a great time for a guest post. This one comes to us from Brittany Taylor over at SimpleLivingandTravel.com. It's about creating a place where your dreams are represented visually so you have a daily, hourly reminder of what's important to you. Many of you have written to ask how to overcome obstacles to traveling the world. Well, if you have your travel dreams in front of you all the time, your mind will start coming up with solutions even while you are working on other things. Charming and I spent NYE creating a shared vision board for the new year, and my sister created her own digital vision board which she shared via Instagram:
So many of us want to travel.
We dream of it while we are at work, going weak in the knees as we scroll through images of dream vacations in tropical paradise, clutching our warm mug in the dead of a northern winter. We fight reality while denying ourselves the dreams that linger deep within our hearts. Or at least that is what I used to do. Then, I decided to start living my dreams.
One amazing thing I discovered while on my journey to dream-realization was about creating vision boards. When I started indulging in vision board creation, I not only learned about the power of images, but I also started to view imagination in a whole new light. I realized that in my focusing on what I wanted, I had the choice to either allow myself to sink into a feeling of lack, concentrating on what I did not yet have, or I could embody the emotions I would feel if I had what I wanted and really indulge in my fantasy. I chose the latter and I decided to consciously start indulging in my dreams on a daily basis.
Images can be truly powerful. We have all experienced how a picture can be worth a thousand words, or how an image can be scarred into our memory. We can harness that power and use it to our benefit.The idea behind creating a vision board is to put together a collection of images that inspires us. We can then keep that
vision board somewhere close by so that you will see it regularly, thus activating those awesome emotions those images bring to us.
How to Do It
There are so many ways to go about creating a vision board. There is the old school way of gathering magazines and sitting around sifting and clipping. And there is the new age way of going digital and harnessing the power of the net. I prefer going digital because it doesn’t take up the physical space in my life and because I can usually find the exact image I know will bring me ultimate inspiration (and in much less time at that).
As far as the subject matter of a vision board goes, this too can vary greatly. It may feel good to just do a general board, hitting on various areas of our lives, or we may want to hone in on a topic, like our physical health, our living space, or our professional life.
For the sake of this piece, let’s hone in on creating a digital vision board that specifically pertains to travel. We want to travel. Nearly all of us want it so badly that if someone asks us where we want to go we already have a place in mind. Some of us have lists. Some of us have lifetimes of it planned. How about we make that a reality?
When to Create
There’s no wrong way to create a vision board, but the timing is important. It’s important to be in the right frame of mind when going into vision board mode. Perhaps you will find yourself inspired and ready to go. Or you may need to do some work to get there. Take a few minutes to clear your mind, to breathe and just be. Do some light stretching or movements to get connected to your body. Do whatever you need to feel comfortable in all parts of you.
Now that you have set your internal environment for the creative time ahead, allow your mind to fantasize about your travel dreams. What do those dreams feel like in your body? Do you feel good imagining them? Make sure you are feeling excited and abundant about them before moving forward. Then, try asking yourself some questions and see what comes up.
What places excite you when you think about visiting them? What sights do you want to see and experience? What cultures do you want to learn about? What foods do you want to try? What music do you want to hear? What smells do you want to breathe in? What activities do you want to try? How do you see yourself moving from place to place? Where do you envision resting your bones after a day of exploration?
Ultimately we are looking to gain a sense of the feelings you want to experience and the images that come to mind when you feel those emotions.
As far as project duration goes, don’t worry about having enough time to complete your vision board all at once. Some boards get created in an afternoon and some take shape over a longer period of time. Yours will come together in a unique way for you. Just set out when it feels right and leave the rest to unfold naturally.
Finding Images
Now that you have fully set the stage, it’s time to find those images.
Start by creating a “Vision Board” folder on your computer (or a safe space to store images on your phone or tablet). This is where you will save your images as you come across them.
Now seek out those inspiring pictures. Perhaps you already have some in mind, maybe from a friend’s recent trip or from something that caught your eye on social media. If that’s the case, grab those ones out first and save them (no worries about copyright infringement because this is for your own personal viewing).
Most images you are going to have to search for. This is the fun part, which I really favor using Google Images for (although I encourage you to use any image finder you enjoy). Using the first image you have in mind, search a word or phrase that you think will generate the results you are looking for. This sounds fairly straightforward, but sometimes it can be tricky.
Remember there are a lot of images out there. For example, you may get really excited by the thought of backpacking through Europe. However, upon a Google image search of “backpack Europe” you may find that the results are not what you had in mind.
I suggest honing in on what you are really envisioning. Is it a Villa in Italy? Or perhaps a small café in France? Is it the coast of the Mediterranean? Or night life in Madrid? Whatever it is, get more specific. Perhaps your phrase is something as precise as “moonlight on water in Greece” or “mangoes market Spain”. The clearer you can be, the more success you will have in finding the results you are looking for.
You may also decide you want certain inspiring words on your board. If this is the case you can either search for them or create them in a program such as Microsoft Word’s WordArt, then save them as an image file.
Putting it All Together
Once you feel like you have enough images, it is time to start putting them all together. There is no right or wrong way to do it.
There are a number of programs you can use to put together your digital vision board. Basically, choose anything that is easy to paste images into while still being able to crop and resize them. Some common programs that would work are Photoshop, Publisher, Gimp, Word, Pages and although I have never used any, I believe there is even software you can use that is specifically for vision board creation.
Once you have selected your preferred program, enjoy pulling in the images you found that feel good for you. Play around with where you want them positioned on the page, what images you want side by side, what size you want them, and so on.
You don’t have to use all of the ones you’ve gathered. You may find that you want to have a very open, spacious board
and so you just have a few pictures. Or perhaps you prefer the excited energy of having everything together. Whatever you decide, it is your creation.
Check in with yourself throughout the process of creating your vision board. Make sure you are feeling excited and playful. If it starts to feel like work at any point, just stop and continue the next time you feel inspired.
Once you have completed your board, sit back and marvel at your finished product. Then, post it somewhere you will look at it regularly. Perhaps it will become your desktop background, or the lock screen on your phone. Maybe you print it out and hang it on your fridge or in your office.
Take pleasure in the viewing of your vision board as frequently as you would like. Let the emotions fill you and remember that you can have everything you dream of.
As you grow and shift, so will your fantasies. If it is fun for you, keep creating vision boards along your journey, saving them, so you can look back over time and take note of all the beautiful ways your dreams have unfolded before you.
This is part two of a guest post by Thomaida Hudanish, a writer, blog reader and traveler whom I met when she came to Palestine as part of a long-term volunteering/mission trip. Make sure you check out part one of the post here. Enjoy. - Genevieve
Type of Trip:
Extended Volunteer/Mission Trip/Pilgrimage a.k.a. Around-the-World-to-Help-Children
Length of Trip:
Indefinite
Destinations:
India, the Middle East, Western Europe
5 More Tips
1. Guidebooks
During trip prep, I love reading guidebooks for historical and cultural insight, maps, and background info about top sites. I thought I would easily find guides as I went, but this wasn't the case. Airport bookstores or large, chain bookstores(where you could find them) were the most reliable places to find guides.
2. Bearing Gifts
Previous volunteers clued me in to what gifts I could bring for the orphanage at my first destination, such as mosquito nets, coloring books and printer ink cartridges. You may also consider some easy-to-pack items unique to your home region. For friends at my second destination, I purchased gifts in India. For hosts at my third destination, I brought something from Turkey and so on.
3. Excercise
I walked a lot and used the stairs more, but let's face it, I wasn't active in the same ways that I am at home. I packed two exercise bands and although I didn't do as many bicep curls as I planned, I was thankful for my occasional mini-workouts.
4. Final Preparations
In the 10 days between my last day of work and take-off for my trip, here's what I did: took a private 1-hour camera lesson, picked up leather inserts to boost the support in my well-worn walking shoes, purchased an international driving permit at AAA, distributed copies of my itinerary, financial info and contact information to trusted friends, drafted a power of attorney, requested a PIN code for my credit card and alerted them of my travel plans, renewed my drivers' license (which was due to expire while I was gone), and purchased travel insurance.
5. Teachable Moments
Although I made a few "mistakes" in my packing, I don't regret anything because it all worked together to make a memorable trip.
• Too many shoes? I packed 4 pairs of shoes + flip flops; seems like a lot for a light packer. I was glad to have extra shoes after I accidentally left my trusted walking shoes on a bus.
• Consider a Global SIM. I found out that in some countries it takes 3 or more days to activate a local SIM card. I think I should have had my phone unloacked and purchased a global SIM (from companies such as gosim.com or worldsim.com) so that I had an emergency communication option available at all times. I ended up purchasing a phone in India and local SIM cards as I went. Now I have a phone loaded with fun Indian ringtones that I can use anywhere.
• Bring a nit comb and favorite lice treatment if you're going to be working with children. I didn't wear my hair back, gave lots of hugs and got lice. What's the positive side? I bonded with one of the older girls while she picked nits out of my hair for two hours and after two weeks of combing and searching, multiple home remedies and lots of washing, I was nit-free! I'll know exactly what to do when facing lice in the future.
• Be Prepared for Air Pollution. India and Palestine have poor air quality for different reasons. I wish that I'd packed a nasal rinse system to help alleviate the coughing and sinus issues I had. Instead, I learned how to rinse with a cup and now I have a new survival skill!
• Brush Up on Driving a Manual Transmission. Not only will you be ready to help out with driving anywhere in any car, but in many cases you may find that stick shift cars are cheaper to rent and more readily available.
For Further Reading:
Two books that I referenced in preparation for this trip were Ron Wolf's Vagabonding and Lonely Planet's First Time Round the World. Although my travel style is less vagabond and more volunteer/pilgrim/tourist, I found practical advice and inspiration in both of these books. One great suggestion they made, for example, was to ship souvenirs home as you go, so you don't have to carry the extra weight in your suitcase. Additionally, I read packinglust.com and travelfashiongirl.com, among other girl-written travel blogs, to keep my naturally functional style balanced with a little bit of fabulous.
While on the road I met up with two other writers whose blogs and travels inspired me prior to departure. Whatever you take away from what is written here about packing and traveling, I hope that you'll also consider that the Internet is a window revealing just a small view of the amazing relationships and places out there to discover. I challenge you to move from the virtual and the vicarious to the rewarding experience of meeting each person and destination with all your senses.
May your journeys be blessed!
Thomaida wrote a series of articles about her 7-month volunteer pilgrimage covering India, Turkey, Israel/Palestine, France, Germany and England at www.honeybeebuzz.org. She lives, writes and dreams up new ways to make the world a better place in Portland, Oregon.
Prince Charming and I, adventurers that we are, created a perfect storm of stress by following this recipe:
Take 5 of the unofficial list of the top 10 most stressful life events you can undergo:
- Having a baby.
- Leaving a job.
- Moving to a new continent.
- Writing a book while launching a separate product.
- Moving back in with the parents as an adult.
Stir. Then bake under an oven set at 350 degrees of jet lag and reverse culture shock.
My pulse is racing just listing out this recipe for stress.
So what's the recipe for serenity?
I've had an extra push of creativity these past few months, probably because I'm anticipating being completely and happily lost in baby-la-la land for a while once the little elf gets here sometime in early December. Stress stifles creativity, so it's important for me to keep those stress levels as low as possible. (Oh, and that's right, it's good for the baby too.)
These tips might help you even if you aren't pregnant, but just going through a stressful time, as all of us normal human beings tend to do from time to time.
Here are some things that have worked for me to keep stress levels at bay so I can stay creative and keep working on the latest book and finish the 30-Day Map to Get Rid of Your Crap. I'd be lying if I said the following keep me in a state of queenly serenity 100% of the time, but they do keep me royally calm at least 3% of the time. Or maybe I just do them 3% of the time and it would help if I...
Do These Things More
1. Marrying well.
Well, this is actually not a habit I do regularly, but something I did once, and did well, even if I do say so myself. He recently asked me "what do you want for lunch, baby?" And I said, "Hmmm... I think Shrimp. Lime Cilantro Shrimp." This exchange happened in front of my mom, and she immediately laughed and said something like "If you can give that answer, you know you married well."
Besides keeping me well-fed, Prince Charming is incredibly supportive about all my creative endeavors. And even my eccentric pregnancy plans, like studying hypnosis for a more comfortable birth.
2. Yoga
Somehow it feels like cheating to call it yoga, because it's mostly stretching and deep breathing for me since I don't know the names of any of the poses. (Except for shivasana, my favorite.) I've taken a lot of yoga classes, so I just do a lot of yogic stretching of any part that is soar or tight. It feels great and seems to help everything in life.
3. Sleeping a lot and taking naps.
I have always slept a lot, and of course now I'm sleeping for two, so I take as much horizontal time as my body wants. For a while in Palestine my sleep pattern was bimodal. According to Wikipedia, "Along with a nap (siesta) in the day, it has been argued that this is the natural pattern of human sleep. A case has been made that maintaining such a sleep pattern may be important in regulating stress."
My body naturally started bifurcating my sleep when I was worried about our friends in Gaza during the ethnic cleansing massacres there this summer, worried about Prince Charming working in Gaza, and anxious about where and how I would bring our baby into the world. Now that I'm back in the US and feeling that my family is safer, I've been sleeping through the night and not needing naps so much.
4. Ability to work on the floor of a closet.
I'm writing this while squatting in front of my computer on the floor of a large walk-in closet. I love it. All I need to write is a private space, even if it's small.
5. Writing every single appointment down in Google Calendar.
I love Google Calendar. It did take me a while to get used to checking it and adding everything to it. But now that it's habit, it helps so much because otherwise I wouldn't be able to keep track of appointments, travel plans, and birthdays. Even if I'm not in a particularly busy phase of life, I rely on Google Calendar and tend to forget things when I don't use it.
6. Eating tons of fruit and vegetables.
I have our nugget to thank for this, because the little monkey loves bananas and other fruit. I wake up craving a big fruit smoothie that I often add greens to like spinach and kale. I still eat plenty of pizza, I just try to load up on fresh produce as well. I polished off a watermelon this morning.
7. Meditation.
This one is so hard for me to do regularly. I skip days all the time. But if I can sit down in a quiet place for even 10 minutes, it seems to help. I don't really follow a particular technique. Sometimes I sit and breath and clear my mind. Sometimes I pray. Sometimes I meditate on things I'm grateful for, or do a forgiveness meditation. I just got an email from Charming's mom about this free meditation series. Maybe I'll do it.
8. Just doing it. (The creative work.)
Have you heard that the concept of will power is a myth? People who are able to stop procrastinating have learned skills to get the work done. I sometimes think of those skills as tricking myself, or turning things into a game. I don't sit down to write books because I have more will power than all the other people who want to write books, but don't. I sit down to write, probably because I told myself there might be chocolate involved, or that maybe after writing I'd get to belt out "Let it Go" with Elsa from Frozen one more time. (I don't even have a kid I can blame that on yet.) Or, like right now, that I'll just START this blog post and it will be just a few words then I'll get up. And here I am at the bottom of the post. Ha ha, Genevieve. Tricked ya again!
What do you do in stressful times to stay serene? Please share in the comments so everyone on the internet can learn from your experience.
By the time this blog post publishes, we will, if all goes according to plan, be back in the U.S. and our time in Palestine will have come to an end. It's been a challenging and adventurous 28 months here. With the ongoing conflict and occupation, it can be hard to stay hopeful about Palestine's future, but there is hope. I want to leave Palestine with hope that the people here will one day be free, and that the conflict will come to a peaceful and just resolution. To share that hope with you, I've compiled a brief list of links and reasons why I have hope for Palestine. These five (mostly non-political) things give me reason to be optimistic about this place.
1. The Arc
Many people in Palestine hope for a one-state solution to the conflict: a single, democratic state where all people can live freely in equality no matter their race or religion. While I think that idea is wonderful, I see it as unlikely. I think a toxic amount of racial injustice would result if the two countries were to become one and it would be very difficult for everyone to have equal opportunities because of the history here. However, perhaps it's better to try and face those obstacles than not try at all. A second-best and still hopeful option would be a two-state solution, with a free and independent Palestine living in peace with Israel.
Enter the Arc. The Arc is part of a plan for the physical infrastructure a successful Palestinian state would need. Created by the Rand Corporation, The Arc gives an important and inspiring vision for a thriving Palestine. Check out the 9-minute overview video here. It's worth a watch. More resources on the Arc are available here.
2. Occupied Pleasures
Photographer Tanya Habjouqa is capturing some amazing images of Palestine and Palestinians. From photos of the head-to-toe covered women of Gaza to images of belly-dancing Palestinian drag queens in East Jerusalem, her work is diverse and fascinating. Most importantly, the images reveal the deep humanity of a much-misunderstood group of people.
3. An Israeli Soldier Speaks
This compelling talk by former Israeli soldier Eran Efrati will give you an inside view into what it's like to be an Israeli soldier occupying Palestine and having the earth-shattering realization that you're "on the wrong side of history." His emotional, heart-breaking, and at times funny speech allows us to see what the conflict is like up close on the ground from both sides. It really is a must-watch, revealing talk. To read more soldier testimonies, check out the book Our Harsh Logic.
4. Juthour Arboretum
From the website "Juthour Arboretum in Ramallah offers a natural reserve where we preserve native trees and plant species, working through educational programs and eco tourism to model and encourage greater individual and communal responsibility towards our threatened natural environment and heritage in Palestine." This eco-park was started by our friends and neighbors in Ramallah, Palestine. I've visited and hiked its terraces many times with Jelly Bean. They've put an incredible amount of work into saving trees so that Palestine's natural heritage will not be forgotten or destroyed by the many threats to it such as the occupation, violent extremist settlers, over-development, construction dumping, and littering. Check out and support what they are doing, especially if you care about preserving the natural beauty of Palestine.
5. The People
I've met some incredible people here, resilient people who have an amazing ability to keep going and maintain hope in the face of an under-occupation experience ranging from the utter monotony of three hours of checkpoint traffic to the overwhelming brutality of missile strikes on civilians in Gaza. To read more about the people we've met here, check out some of the posts in the Palestine category.