2013 in Review

A month into 2014, and I've finally found space to look back at the last year on Packing Lust and review 2013. 2013 was the first full year of this blog's existence, since I started it in the summer of 2012.

2013 started out with visiting family on the East Coast, where planning for my mom's Cruzbike Race Across America (then 6 months away) to race 3000 miles for the cure for brain cancer was in full swing.

Down in beautiful and sunny Florida, I visited with my aunt and uncle, Trog, and Grammy.

In the meantime, Prince Charming was struggling through a very snowy week back in Ramallah.

In March, we left our new-but-problematic-and-far-flung apartment and moved into a fixer-upper, near the city center.  Along with our new home came a bunch of new friends we are thankful for. We tried not to offend our neighbors.

It was a Spring of enjoying both Palestine and Israel, with trips to Jaffa and Herzeliya beach, where a bulldozer almost ruined our day.

In May, I officially unveiled Prince Charming's handsome face. For now, we are still keeping his real name off the blog. Our marriage turned one in April.

Also in May sometime, we took a trip to Amman and Petra, Jordan. I blogged it, then lost that post. Eventually I re-blogged what I could remember. [Update: that re-blogged post is here.]

In June, my mom won the Race Across America, and I was there crewing from California to Maryland and every state in between.

Jelly Bean turned one sometime in June. We forgot to celebrate, but we give her birthday presents almost every day in the form of treats, toys, and bones.

I celebrated my July birthday with a small, quiet celebration, and by posting some sun-soaked photos I took with my birthday present.

In August, it was back to the states again for another big traveling month, with visits to Maine to see Charming's parents, then down the East Coast to see lots of friends and attend two weddings.

Maine:

K&C got married:

And then my brother too.

In September, Calli came to visit us in Palestine!

Fall brought a fun trip to the Golan Heights, where we stayed in a yurt and tasted some nice wine. Romantic.

I didn't post it on Packing Lust, but I had a great time painting my own and some friends faces for a Ramallah Halloween party:

We found a home for this stray puppy.

Just before Christmas, Ramallah got hit with some heavy snow; despite the weather, my family still managed to survive and thrive on their visit here.

Then it was Christmas in Rome. I plan to post soon about our Rome-antics and Italy fun, but for now here's a preview photo.

Career

My writing got a boost when my first book, Minimalism for Grandparents, won an About.com Reader's Choice Award early in the year. In April, I started blogging for Fairy Tale Life and officially launched my coaching business, Fairy Tale Life Coaching, in May. Today, I'm planning to bring my coaching practice over here to Packing Lust, and to bring my blog content over here too. In November, I focused hard on drafting book number two, Minimalist Living, and launched the book in December.

Packing Lists

There was only one post in 2013 dedicated solely to packing advice:

Minimalist Packing for Visiting the Gaza Strip

Must remedy that in the 2014 with more packing advice!

On Community

A huge theme for the year for me was community. When we moved into this home in March of 2013, we instantly had good friends in our neighbors, and we also gained access to the vibrant cafe downstairs, where it's easy to meet up with or bump into friends and colleagues.  Over and over, whether it was through what I was reading or in my life around me, I saw that community matters more than almost anything else. Whether it was my neighbor showing up at my door with fresh eggs from the chickens in her garden, family and strangers rallying around my mom's Race Across America in support of brain cancer victims, or my online community of beta readers and supporters of my book publishing, I felt deeply thankful for my community is 2013.

What were the themes for you in 2013?

What did you learn, experience, or do that you are proud of or grateful for?

Here's to a great 2014,

P.S. I thought this "year in review" thing was such a good idea, that I recently did one for 2012, too! I backdated it, but you can see it here.

How to Offend Your Neighbors

I had good intentions. I truly did.

I wanted to paint every room in my house a different color.  At the paint store, Morgan (my downstairs neighbor) and I chose what we hoped would be a deep, calming blue, like diving into a swimming pool on a hot day. It turned out looking more like Smurf blue. Okay.

Once the blue was done, I decided to paint one of my favorite spiritual quotes on one wall.

I read "Only love is real" in a book about A Course in Miracles, and I thought it would make an inspiring quote for me to contemplate each day during breaks from work.

I began, painting high on a ladder in thick, white block letters.

I soon finished, happy with my wall.

But then Morgan gently noted that I hadn't left much space between the "is" and the "real."

Since I wrote it high on the wall, it was visible from the street below, as we are on the second story.

So to Palestinians passing by -- people affected every day by the brutal Israeli occupation -- it looked like my wall said:

"Only love isreal." Or, to the quickly glancing eye,

Only love Israel.

And I had written the unintentionally political message in white on a blue wall, exactly the colors of the flag of Israel.

Who does that? Sets out to write an uplifting spiritual quote and ends up reminding her neighbors of the bane of their existence?

Me. I did it. Hahaha.

Although this happened close to when we moved into this apartment back in March of 2013, I thought it blog worthy now, since each time I tell the story it gets funnier. Mistake + time = funny.

Don't worry, I hussled back up that ladder to paint over the "real" with my Smurf blue. I moved it way over to the right and down, at such a safe distance that "is" and "real" could never, ever, be in danger of turning into "Israel."

Now the wall looks like this:

Lesson learned. Don't move into the middle of an oppressed people group and write a pro-oppressor message on your wall.

Love is real,

How to Turn Conflict-Zone Living into a Video Game

Welcome to the first Packing Lust post of 2014! I'm so excited to get back to posting after a nice, long, good-for-the-soul holiday break. Let me set the scene for you. It was mid December, and Charming and I were looking forward to our family's visit with warm anticipation.  We decorated. Charming made a star-shaped tree topper out of aluminum foil whose star shape would later be called into question.

Morgan (BFF, land lady, and co-owner of the cafe downstairs) did an AMAZING job decorating the restaurant, turning its already warm atmosphere into a festive tribute to the season.

And then, as if perfectly timed, it started snowing. How quaint. I took this picture with plans to show you what I assumed would be a light, pre-Christmas dusting.

But then it kept on snowing.

And snowing.

And snowing. Until we were completely snowed in. Except for Jelly, who is an unstoppable canine force.

The power was out for days. Propane was running dangerously low. Charming was fielding calls from freezing employees who didn't have a way to heat their homes, but who were more concerned about the run-off flooding Gaza and displacing thousands. I spent a day downstairs with Morgan and Saleh complaining about how cold I was. They let me sit in the spot closest to the fire, piled blankets on my shoulders, and put their dog in my lap. I went out at one point and got into a life-or-death snowball fight with strange men. I survived and promised Charming (and myself) I wouldn't leave again during the storm.

The roads out of town were closed. My vision of greeting my family at the airport wouldn't come true.

When they landed at Ben Gurion Airport, they had to  make their own way to a hotel in the city. Little did we know, Tel Aviv was sunny and practically balmy.

As soon as it was remotely possible, we got into a 4-wheel drive vehicle and headed for the beach. Getting out of town was like leaving the wreckage of a zombie-desolated city. Cars were sliding all over the road.  At one point, I left the safety of the Jeep to make a mad dash over ice for an ATM. Armed with cash, a first aid kit, extra water and blankets, we started our journey to the coast, neither of us sure if the roads would be open or passable.

We made it. It took twice as long as normal, but once we were out of the treacherous hills, it was an easy trip. It was so great to finally see my family and enjoy a Tel Aviv coastal sunset.

I should note now that this isn't my entire family. My dad and two more siblings weren't able to make it for this trip. Maybe next time.  We had such a wonderful time with our smart, funny, loving, and very patient and gracious family. We made sure their trip included lots of good food, starting on our first night together in Tel Aviv.

The next day it was back to Ramallah, where the snow was melting.

Charming outdid himself with his breakfast spreads. We ate.

And ate.

And ate.

and ate.

And went all around both Israel and Palestine, including an emotional visit to Hebron. Very few people were around, except for the TIPH observers. (Temporary International Presence in Hebron).

The family were good sports the whole time, turning the challenges of 3rd-world living into levels 1-5 of a video game. Level one being getting through passport control, and level five being a moment in Hebron when, upset Charming hadn't tipped them enough for their (unrequested) services, a huge gang of boys surrounded our vehicle and tried to trap us in the parking lot they had lead us to by closing the gates. We escaped our would-be captors by a very narrow opening. Perhaps our good luck was due to all the holiness, including a trip to the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem and the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem.

Here they are stooping low to go in the door that was made small to protect the Church of the Nativity from marauders on horseback, and presumably, tall people.

We took them out to Ein Kenya, which is a beautiful spot of nature near Ramallah, and home of Juthour Arboretum.  We got our exercise, and my mom, brother, and sister managed to hang out looking like models for sunglasses and active wear.

We went to Jericho and on down to catch a view of the Dead Sea.

The trip gave me the opportunity to do some Gensplaining. I love pretending to know what I'm talking about.

Prince Charming got to do some tour-guiding as well. It was a pleasure when our visitors were so open-minded, curious, and eager to talk about the joys and challenges of the region.

Seriously, family, your visit and wonderful mindset rocked and made every minute fun.

I thank all three of you for being intrepid & adventurous,

positive and resilient in the face of obstacles and setbacks,

and extremely stylish and radiantly attractive.

I was so sad when you packed up to leave.

We love you!

How to Create a Beautiful Website Without Wanting to Die

Do you ever want to just give up before you start working on your website? Ever thrown yourself down dramatically on a dock and said “How am I ever going to create a beautiful and functional website about my sea shell collection?”

Yeah, me neither. But if you want to create a powerful website with minimal drama, you’re in luck. I’ve got a list of my favorite tips and resources right here for you. This is for those who don’t want to mess with a lot of code and aren’t professional developers, yet want to have as much freedom as possible over the look and feel of their site.

Here, for free, are my best steps and tips (and what I do) for creating websites:

Steps

1. Use WordPress.org (not WordPress.com). Follow this tutorial to get WordPress working for you to create a self-hosted blog that you will turn into an awesome website. Self-hosting via WordPress.org is the single best, industry standard way to get the most out of your website. You will eventually regret it if you go with Weebly or a similar service because when you’re ready to grow, they can’t grow with you.

Think About Theme

2. If you are going to use a free theme, select one with lot of positive reviews, not a new, untried one. Look from the dashboard of WordPress under the Appearance > Themes > Install Themes tab. However, I recommend learning on one of the themes that comes pre-installed free with WordPress, and then paying for the Headway Theme.

3. Now it’s time to learn the basics of WordPress, such as how to add a new post, create a menu, and add photos. The WordPress Codex has everything you need, starting with some basic terminology.

4. If you are willing to pay for a theme, I recommend Headway, which you can download here. You’ll probably only need the base plan ($87). Headway allows more customization-without-knowing-code than any other theme I’ve tried. Not convinced? Read more about it here.

5. I recommend watching tutorials to help you learn how to design in Headway, which involves minimal coding. Search Google or Youtube to find a video that answers your specific Headway questions, or you can find free tutorials here. If you are willing to pay to make your learning process and time shorter and sweeter, I recommend Websites Made Easy, by Nathalie Lussier. She has a way of breaking down technical projects into actual human language. I personally use her Websites Made Easy tutorials and I love them.

5. My favorite website to find royalty-free images to use on your blog or site is Photo Pin. I love how it helps you give proper attribution.

6. For editing images, you could use a program like Photoshop that takes forever and slows your computer down, or you could use PicMonkey, which I recommend.

7. Install a few basic plugins from the WordPress Dashboard. I recommend Akismet, BackupBuddy, and JetPack by WordPress.com.

tips

Break it step down into bite-sized pieces. Make a list, and cross each one off as you go.

Pace yourself — don’t try to get your website up and running perfectly in one day.

All most every WordPress question has already been answered  somewhere out there — Google and Youtube are your best, best, best, best, best, best friends.

Rock on!

Yours,

Your Worst Enemy

This is a guest post by my wonderful, funny and wise grandfather, Trog. Thanks for sharing, Trog.

I recently wrote about enthusiasm being your best friend. So, if enthusiasm is your best friend—then what is your worst enemy?

 That would be the opposite of enthusiasm, optimism, and happiness.

that would be pessimism, unhappiness, darkness, gloom and meanness.

I once had a friend who I worked with. Sometimes we went to lunch together, and sometimes we had to work on a case together. He seemed just like a regular “guy,” but spending time with him usually depressed me. He seemed to have no love of life. There was no excitement or happy expectation of anything. I think he was trying to be sophisticated by being unemotional.  He was blase, bored, and disappointed with his life. He seemed to think that he was too high and mighty to be doing such a dull job.

There are no jobs that are “dull” only “dull” people who don’t know how to make their job interesting and exciting. I’ll grant you sometimes it takes a lot of creativity and imagination. Sometimes you have to “work at it.” But, life is all about how you perceive things… another case of attitude controlling your altitude.

the lesson to learn is don’t let these unhappy complainers, and critics drag you down to their level. don’t let them grind you down. sometimes it is hard to resist joining them in their weltschmerz  (german)—”world woe”; romantic melancholy and sentimental pessimism.

I’ll end this missive with a tag line from the film The Bridge on the River Kwai (William Holden and Alex Guinness). The director of the film was David Lean–who also directed Lawrence of Arabia.

 You probably know the story- locale –a POW camp in the jungle of S.E. Asia. The POW’s are captured British soldiers who are being starved and beaten and made to work on the railroad. The Japanese Colonel in charge of the camp–stands on a box and addresses newly arrived prisoners. He says, the motto of this camp is: “Be happy in our work.”

(Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/zoomar/145322737/)

The Blender Story

This is part of the Don’t Be Like Me series, a new column of mostly true stories illustrating what not to do in life.Email me if you’d like to contribute. We all have a story.

When Prince Charming recently came home from a three day trip to Gaza, he was all “Agh… this really stressful thing happened…. someone almost got arrested and I lost my right foot in a freak accident, do you still love me?”

And I was like “AHHHH! That sounds horrible but this blender, and arg, and I am so frustrated. Pay attention to my needs first and then I’ll try to listen to you better.”

Prince Charming:  Ok, what’s the problem? (I love him so much.)

Me: I should have used the food processor for this but I don’t know how to use the d____ thing and I f-ing hate it!

(I’m attempting to use a butter knife, spatula, and chopstick simultaneously to dig the cementing pie-gel from under the sharp blades of the vitamix blender.)

Me: I HATE COOKING!!!

Prince Charming: You know, I can show you how to use the food processor.

Me: No! Cooking shouldn’t be like that! You should’t have have to assemble a complicated piece of machinery to cook! And then you have to wash it. And it’s so dangerous! All those moving parts. Ah! I want to push a button and do it! Cooking should be, like, easy. If I can’t figure out how to do it by myself, it isn’t worth it! AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! WHY IS MY LIFE SO HARD???

Charming: So you didn’t have to learn how to use the oven? You just naturally know how to do everything?

Me: You probably have a point but I really don’t want to tell you that right now. That is why I said that first part in a quiet Shy Ronnie voice AND THIS IN MY LOUD YELLING VOICE:  ITS NOT THAT I KNOW HOW TO DO EVERYTHING, IT’S THAT WITH A LITTLE EXPERIMENTATION, YEAH, I CAN FIGURE ALMOST EVERYTHING OUT. BUT I’VE MESSED WITH THE FOOD PROCESSOR FOR LIKE TWO HOURS AND I STILL CAN’T FIGURE IT OUT. I DON’T WANT TO NEED HELP, I DON’T!!!!! OK?

You can probably see where I am going with this. It’s crazy to think you can do it all on your own. No one ever accomplishes anything magnificent all on their own, not even a vegan pie crust. If we look around, we are generally surrounded by kind, supportive, one-footed or two-footed people who are willing and eager to help us learn what we need to learn, go where we need to go, and be the people we need to be.

Don’t be like me and try to do it all on your own without help. We are all in this together.

ADDENDUM: Don’t worry, Prince Charming did not really lose his foot.  That was a metaphor for an extremely stressful experience that took a toll on him. Thankfully, not THAT much of a toll.

Pie crust-covered hugs (the best kind),

(photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/lintmachine/2987986325/)

Why Selling Art is an Act of Compassion

I was recently talking to a fellow artist — a photographer– and I told her that I looked at her photos when I was having a bad day and needed to feel better.

her response was incredulous. “do you really mean that? or are you just saying that because you’re my friend?”

I couldn’t believe she was asking me if I really meant what I said. Her work is stunning. Her business is growing. Her clients are overjoyed. Is she still maturing as a photographer? Yes. She’s still finding her voice and vision. But her work is already way above that of entry-level professional photographers.

Like many artists who are in a similar stage, she is having trouble charging what her services are really worth.  She underestimates her own abilities, which is something I frequently see in my work as an artist coach. This underestimation undercuts her ability to market and sell her services.

There’s something she doesn’t understand, and it is something many artists don’t understand. This something is the single most important thing I can tell an artist about selling art:

selling art is an act of compassion.

It’s not about you. It’s not about your skills, or lack thereof. It’s not about your fears about not being able to fulfill your artistic vision. Every artist has growing to do.

SELLING ART IS ABOUT THE EFFECT YOUR ART HAS ON THOSE WHO EXPERIENCE IT.

And that effect is a powerful one. Art makes people feel something. As humans, we need to feel. We need to feel strong emotions of passion, excitement, surprise, shock, connection, serenity, joy, rage, and the whole gamut. Perhaps if you truly understood the affect your art has on people (not everyone perhaps, but the special group who “gets it” who is it your job to find) then you would see what an act of compassion it is to create and sell art.

There is no other industry or field that can claim such a noble purpose. Some people think that selling a utilitarian item – a washing machine, for example – is easier than selling art, because a washing machine does something we all need – it cleans our clothes.  We all need clean clothes, right?

More than clean clothes, we all need beauty in our lives. Beauty makes us forget our troubles for a moment, and it can also sooth our wounds, acting as a balm for heart ache. In slums around the world, people don’t own washing machines. They walk around in dirty clothes. But take a look at photos of these slums, and you’ll see the satellites and television antennae. Somehow, they found a way to bring art into a place missing most basic necessities.

All great art comes out of love, not just for ourselves, but for others.  Let’s remember that when we sell our art, we are offering one of the most numinous experiences a human being can have. That is priceless, of course.

Yet human psychology teaches us that people value what they pay for more than what they get for free.   Value, or benefit to the viewer’s life increases when he or she pays for art (with money or something else of value).

Therefore, not only is making and sharing art an act of compassion, but selling art is an even greater act of compassion.

By pricing your art well and communicating clearly about it (which is all selling is), you as an artist are actually increasing the amount of joy your customer can feel about your art.

I hope this is starting to sink in. By selling your art at the right price, you are effectively improving the quality of your customer’s life experience more than even meeting his or her basic needs would. Don’t believe it when someone tells you humanity’s need for transcendence is less than humanity’s need for basic necessities. If that were true, the world wouldn’t be at war over ideas. While there is violence over access to basic resources, world peace is much more threatened by ideas like culture, religion, equality, love, and freedom. We fight hardest for the things that bring us a sense of connection and transcendence.

I believe if art was more valued in the world, there would be more peace in the world. Art brings people together. Art lifts people up, making them feel better when they otherwise might turn to violence.   The value of art is its great potential to bring world peace.

As artists, it’s our jobs to be the first to value art. The way we value art is by creating it and selling it.  Have compassion on the world by selling your art.

♥ ♥ ♥ ,

(Heart image credit :http://www.flickr.com/photos/bestrated1/371032725/)

What I Gained and Lost in the Packing Lust Move

Welcome to the new Packing Lust! I've had a challenging time (adventurous is my preferred word) giving the website a complete makeover and moving it from Weebly to Wordpress. I learned a lot in the process, so overall it was a positive experience. I couldn't have done the move without the help of a Bangladeshi technical whiz who goes by the moniker Genius Fred. Thank you, Mr. Ferdoush. Wordpress is a much more powerful platform that allows me to self-host my blog and do much more with it than I could with Weebly. I'm gaining flexibility and control over the design and user experience of Packing Lust. However, I had to make one major sacrifice to move to Wordpress.

I lost your comments.

I wasn't able to import your beautiful words of support and encouragement to the new site. They are gone. However, it's very important to me that you know how much your comments mean to me, even now, when they are gone from individual posts. Through the year and a half that Packing Lust as been around, your comments made me feel connected, supported, and encouraged.

I want to give special thanks to Natalie, Maria, Calli, Lucia, Mo, Trog, Special K, Dan Kenney, Philip Harold, Grandpa, John Tolhurst, Rewa, and all of you who took the time to comment (for your privacy, I listed your names as you chose to in your comments). Special thanks to Natalie and Maria who would win first prize for blog support if I was giving out prizes. Knowing that all of you are keeping up with what we are doing on Packing Lust means the world to me. Each time there is a comment on the blog, I excitedly click to see it and my heart is warmed by your words.

Please keep commenting on the new blog if you enjoy the writing and photos. Thanks so much!

What’s More Fun Than Being a “Serious” Artist?

Answer: Being a fun artist.

That is, having fun creating your art. If what you are working on isn’t something that you would not read/watch/view/experience during your weekend chill time, stop! Do something fun.

One of my favorite artist-writers, Austin Kleon, suggests:

Draw the art you want to see, start the business you want to run, play the music you want to hear, write the books you want to read, build the products you want to use – do the work you want to see done.

I wholeheartedly agree with Austin on this one.  You've got to be inspired by what you already love. Or, you’ve got to create something that you have looked for, and not found. Ideally, a combination of the two.

AND HEY, YOU CAN BE AS “SERIOUS” AS YOU WANT TO BE.

If that’s truly who you are. If you are working on an anomic novel where the main character’s journey is one long walk through the rain, ending with her suicide, that’s totally cool. As long as that’s the sort of fiction you read when you are trying to relax after a long day.

So have more fun as an artist by creating the sort of things that you enjoy. I know that if you make the sort of art that is fun for you to consume, your work can find an audience.

Take action now by making a list of the books you are reading and the art you love. Compare this list with the projects you are working on. If there are no similarities, you may want to rethink that project.

WHAT DO YOU THINK? LET ME KNOW IN THE COMMENTS.